Do You Need to Reset?

In the mid-seventies--as part of a radical move to simplify their lives--my parents hauled my four brothers and I from bustling San Antonio, TX to a remote area of Northern California. We lived in the majestic Sierra Nevada Mountains near the Donner Pass. I rode our horses Bobbie and Pattie bareback, hiked over rocks and climbed trees barefoot, spent hours lounging in the sunny fields on my stomach writing poetry, daydreaming and enjoying the strong, clean smell of the Ponderosa pines.

But what I remember most from that period of my life was my relationship to time. It felt expansive, luxurious and endless. My brother and I would disappear into the forests for hours with nary a watch in site. No one called for us and no one bothered us. We had space to be, to explore and to follow our whims, wherever they took us. (At the time we attended a Waldorf school, so lucky us-no homework!)

This weekend, after a month of non-stop weekend activity, my family finally enjoyed a quiet, restful two-day respite. (I had to actually "plan" and fiercely guard this unscheduled weekend to make it happen; our only "have to" was an hour-long soccer game on Saturday.)

The break illuminated for me how essential it is for all of us to have expanses of time to do nothing. To do less so we can experience more (the title of one of the chapters in my new book Nurturing the Soul of Your Family: 10 Ways to Reconnect and Experience Peace in Everyday Life-New World Library 2013).

It seems crazy that we would have to fight off invitations, obligations, family and friend requests and distractions in order to "claim" this downtime for our family-- which we so desperately needed in order to "reset." To recalibrate. To pull back and remember what matters most.

Shouldn't it be a given that we have time to rest? Isn't this the most important thing we should be doing during our weekends, anyway (my yoga teacher says our job is to "do nothing--and then rest")?

I have a cellular memory for how it felt as an eleven year-old to languish outdoors with my brothers in nature during our California sojourn. Now the question is how do I gift that same feeling to my son and reclaim it for myself?

Invitation: One of the biggest "resets" for me is to attend a beautiful guided retreat with someone who is masterful at creating an experience that offers group time, nature time AND solo time. I'd love to have you join me April 27-29 at Esalen in Big Sur, CA or June 22-24 at Kripalu in the MA Berkshire mountains. The retreats are almost full; learn more here.

P.S. In honor of Mother's Day, we're giving away a Yummy Mummy Year of Self-Care package, which includes an all expenses paid trip to my Kripalu retreat (a $2500 value). Learn more.


I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:  

• Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Personal Renewal Groups for women
• Attend a retreat/event including my April 27-29  Esalen and June 22-24 Kripalu retreats and check out all upcoming events
• Learn about Live Inside Out and receive weekly inspiration on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
• Pick up my life balance title The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
• Read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
• Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
• Empower Others: Schedule Renee for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
• I Choose Love PSA: a reminder that when we come from love--one of the most powerful yet underutilized forces on the planet--we have the ability to transcend fear and remember what we're really hear to do: give and receive love. Learn more.

Subscribe to The Journey, a weekly blog about coach/author/entrepreneur ReneeTrudeau’s personal journey to creating balance from the inside out. 
 
Photo: One of the places I reset or recalibrate is Barton Springs in Austin. This photo was taken last summer; I can't wait for my annual baptism-into-summer dive this May!

Why Can't I Sit Still?

I finished the first draft of the manuscript for my new book on Friday (more to come on this fruitful journey and the gifts that came from the last several months). In many ways, the work is just beginning, but I’m committed to stopping to smell the roses whenever I can.

To celebrate and reconnect, my family headed down to Port Aransas on the Texas coast, for a weekend of doing nothing. At least that was the idea.

Even though I love to sit, relax and just listen to the ocean waves, I had a hard time just being.

When my husband put down a Mexican blanket for us on the beach (my ten-year-old son and his friend swam everyday we were there, even though the water was 60 degrees), I started doing yoga. And when we headed to the south jetty to look at the jellyfish, I brought my small Moleskine notebook and a pen in case I thought of new ideas to incorporate into the book. In the early evening, I invited the guys to sit out on the condo porch with me and watch the sun set—while I flipped through an old National Geographic.

Why is it so hard to just sit and do nothing. No thing. Not one thing. For me, yes—I’m a big idea girl and am constantly envisioning, dreaming and imagining—but I think it also ties back to my old habitual thinking around productivity=worth (read more).

I watched myself this weekend without judgment, more with amusement than anything else. (My husband came up with a new career for himself: he’s so good at resisting the compulsion to “get busy” that he’s going to become a presence coach and offer to sit with people like me who feel the drive to multitask and help us do nothing; he’s guessing he could charge $100/hour for this. What do you think?!)

I know that the desire to do more than one thing at a time is common for many of us and it’s a rare bird—like my beloved—that can sit and stare out into nature without feeling the need to pick up shells or brainstorm on places he’d like to visit. But, I can’t help but notice  how multitasking makes me feel (speeded up, tight, constricted, less open to solutions, less connected to others). And not just while it’s happening, but for hours and days later.

This week as I return to hundreds of unopened emails from the last two months and reply to a long stream of requests, I’m going to build in short spells into my day where I literally do nothing.  Feel free to join me if you're free--I'd love the company.

P.S. I guess my intention last week to remain curious paid off! I've received a lot of new insights this week.

Join us and CHOOSE LOVE in 2012: The I Choose Love public service campaign is a reminder that when we come from love--one of the most powerful yet underutilized forces on the planet--we have the ability to transcend fear and remember what we're really hear to do: give and receive love. Learn more and order a tshirt (at cost).

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

• Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Personal Renewal Groups for women
• Attend a retreat/event including my April 13th Empowered Entrepreneur Retreat and my April Esalen and June Kripalu retreats
• Learn about Live Inside Out and receive weekly inspiration on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
• Pick up my life balance title The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
• Read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
• Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
• Empower Others: Schedule Renee for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization

Subscribe to The Journey, a weekly blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to creating balance from the inside out. 

Video:  The Gulf of Mexico, Port Aransas, Texas.