Practice

This morning my nine year-old was in total disequilibrium.

I don’t know if it was the 9/11 documentary we let him watch, the full moon or another growth spurt, but it didn’t feel good and I didn’t want any of us to leave for the day on a sour note. So right before our family walked out the door for the day--at my request--we circled up, dropped to the living room floor, did a check in with Jonah on what’s going on, listened from the heart, set individual intentions for our day and gave each other hugs before we walked out into the world. It’s amazing what taking a bit of time to be present with another will do!

I’m the in middle of taking some quantum leaps forward around how I work/run my business and manage my life. I’m very excited about stepping into this new way of being (in fact I’m launching a whole program with this same title!) and experiencing more freedom and space in my life. But this morning reminded me that even though I’ve been practicing and teaching “life balance essentials” for 10 years, (ex: managing your energy/saying no, slowing down/being more present, embracing self-care and asking for/receiving help) I still have to remind myself to tap into these tools daily.

Practice is defined as “to perform repeatedly so as to become proficient.”

I got the chance to attend a workshop on the Art of Mindfulness with Buddhist Priest and author Karen Maezen Miller in Houston on Saturday. Maezen (her Buddhist name) lovingly and passionately encouraged us to be particularly mindful of where/how we focus our attention when we’re interacting in our most intimate relationships. And that this truly requires a certain level of practice; she recommended meditation as the key to getting there—I second this.

Yesterday morning I awoke to the sounds of my son playing the piano. He’s been taking lessons since he was 6 (thank you Anna Larson) but he just hit his stride—both hands, flowing, enjoyable to listen to, connected to the music, even practicing without being asked. As I lay in my bed (slightly irritated that is was 6:35 a.m. but enjoying the beautiful sounds coming from downstairs), I had the ah-hah that we’re all on the same path. His progress came from repeated practice. It seems like his leap happened overnight, but it didn’t. It came from playing simple songs and scales over and over day after day.

I’m feeling gratitude for the message this morning that you have to feed the kids before you can send them to college (or in my case, keep returning to the “life balance essentials” before I move to the next stage)and appreciating the reminder that a “rewiring” or quantum shift in how we do things is usually preceded by lots and lots of practice, baby steps and sometimes years of playing Row, Row, Row Your Boat until one day, you can play the theme from Harry Potter.

Thank you Jonah, I needed that.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event; join me Oct. 14-16 at Kripalu in the amazing cool Berkshire mountains for our Women's Self-Renewal Retreat.
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, and read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration
The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Video: Jonah, 9, playing Flying Fingers by Carolyn Setliff. One of his favs.

A Different Way

In fall 2008 I was nuts.

Launching my first book, coordinating our global Personal Renewal Group program and running two coaching/consulting businesses was eating my lunch.

I felt like I was in the middle of a tug of war (with each of my businesses at opposite ends), and, it was a no-win scenario.

Every day in my meditation/prayer time, I would ask, “Help me. I desire to see this in a new light. I desire to work in a new way.” And, finally—after a lot of inner work—I did have a breakthrough, a release, and I breathed and all was well again. Like most big shifts, it came from “how I chose to see the situation,” rather than an actual change in the situation itself!

Well, round two. I’m back again. And, while I’m really content with most aspects of my life and many would say I’ve done a decent, maybe even good job of balancing my work demands and family/personal needs, this period of unplugging* has shown me in a few short days that things need to change: I desire an even slower, simpler life and work pace. And, I desire to spend even less time online.

I just wrote about the concept of going with the flow in my recent newsletter (read more). And while I believe and live this principle, I’m realizing that there are degrees of going with the flow ... there’s going for a Sunday drive with the windows rolled down, your hair blowing in the wind and an open mind about where the road may take you ... and then, there is taking your hands off the wheel.

Trusting, releasing and surrendering at such a high level (to God or the Universe), that going with the flow actually begins to look like not driving at all!

Does this sound crazy? Am I making any sense?

Years ago I was working with some brilliant consultants/friends on a product launch.

They had lined up some important meetings in New York with three key decision makers and felt strongly we needed to head to the east coast to meet them right away. My gut was screaming (literally—I was throwing up in the bathroom) that the timing was not right, we were pushing too hard and we needed to wait. But I wanted to honor their expertise, and after three cancelled and flights due to a snowstorm we finally arrived in the big apple.

Taking to the receptionist in a big, sterile office building downtown the following day, we were informed that Janet, our 1:00 had just left to go home with a stomach virus (and no, they didn’t care that we had flown there to meet her from Austin).

Our next meeting with the head of a powerful media group went well—but we found out shortly after our return home, that her father passed away the day after we left and she would be leaving her company for an extended sabbatical. And while these meetings weren’t fruitful, I am still grateful today for this experience and the huge reminder to always, always listen to my inner knowing, and to pay close attention when things are not flowing.

We teach what we need to learn. And coming into balance has been a life-long struggle for me. It’s also something I’m really dedicated to. (Read Is Ms. Balance Out of Balance?)

I remember a therapist asking me in my twenties as I sat on her flowered, aging couch, “Your emotional well-being is of paramount importance; there’s nothing that matters more. What decisions are you willing to make to preserve this?”

I think she’d be happy to see me now. And to witness my willingness to do anything and everything to not only maintain, but to enhance and evolve my sense of peace and well-being, both inside and out.

So back to the meditation cushion for me. And while I don’t have a clue as to what this new way of working and living will look like in the fall, I know my desire for more ease and flow is strong (overwhelmingly so). And I trust—like always—the answer will come. In its own good time.

*From June 6-July 28, I am officially unplugged and out of the office to work on a new writing project. I’ll still be blogging, but only every two weeks. But hop on over to Live Inside Out for daily dialogue on how to live more intentionally.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event or workshop, including our July 29th Career Strategy Workshop: Find a Fit, Create a Plan, Love Your Work in Austin
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, join us for our Aug. 25 class on Going with the Flow While Still Getting Things Done! and read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: Me in my favorite hammock chair. I'm writing an outline for a new project and enjoying a banana-coconut smoothie while listening to the morning doves and drinking in the thousand shades of green in our backyard. I could get used to starting my day like this!

Being Present

I love it when the Universe calls me up to the plate, puts a bat in my hands, throws me a big old curve ball and sees how I’m going to react.

I’m really getting the opportunity to practice what I preach right now.

My husband was layed off two weeks ago (he’s doing great, thanks for all your prayers, support and leads for software quality assurance jobs) and is focusing on his job search. While he is feeling calm, excited for what’s next and hopeful about finding something he loves that is close to our home, I am feeling a bit anxious (I had big plans for this summer that may have to change—read more).

I have a deep knowingness that everything will unfold for the best, but I’m finding myself having a hard time staying present.

Summer is my favorite time of year—I love the fresh peaches and basil, I love taking long/cold plunges at Deep Eddy, I love reading, reading and more reading and I love enjoying a slower pace with my family.

I don’t want to give this up and am very mindful that if I allow myself to be preoccupied with worry or go into “the spin cycle” around finances, summer will pass me by and I’ll wake up on Labor Day, having missed some of the best days of the year!

So my intention moving forward is to pause frequently, to enjoy this wonderful, special time of year in Central Texas, to take time to make blueberry-banana smoothies on a stick (my 8 year-old's newest invention) and roasted veggie pizzas, to enjoy lazy, evening neighborhood walks with friends/family, to relish swimming in Texas' many wonderful natural springs and to remember that just because life has thrown us a curve ball, doesn’t mean we have to step out of the game.

JOIN A GROUP, ATTEND A RETREAT/WORKSHOP OR DIALOGUE WITH ME: Would you like to learn strategies for being more present and slowing down? Join us in the cool Berkshire mountains in MA this coming August at the beautiful Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health for our Self-Renewal Retreat Aug. 13-15. One of my favorite spots on the planet and the retreat center that I visit when I'm ready to make a huge life shift! Visit our calendar to learn more about upcoming events including our FREE June 17th Live Inside Out teleclass for couples on Staying Connected to Your Partner.

Also, check out our Live Inside Out community and share how you create balance in your relationship.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to life balance and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: My son and I take a closer look at a small, sweet frog at Hamilton Pool while on a hike.

What's Your Mantra?

A couple of week ago I was coaching two entrepreneurs in my office, one after the other, around issues related to owning their power, growing their business and experiencing more balance in their lives. (I do very little one-on-one coaching now since I have a fabulous team in place to serve our clients and I am traveling a lot more for speaking/workshops. So, it feels like a rare privilege when I do get this opportunity.)

One client, a 42-year old leadership consultant, believed that “If I just work really hard and prove my worth, everything will be ok.” The other, a highly successful 38-year old writer, operated from the place that “Life is hard and sometimes, if you’re lucky, you’ll get a break.”

We all have a mind-set or “mantra” (a commonly repeated word or phrase) about life that we recycle over and over in our heads, whether we’re conscious of this or not.

What I find fascinating right now—in these very interesting, potentially stressful times—is that our mantras about life are having a huge impact on our perspective around the economic downturn.

I have many mantras—we all do—but one that continually pops to the surface time and time again is “Everything always works out for the best.”

Even though many of my clients and friends—and my businesses as well—are experiencing repercussions from the recession, in the long run, I think this time will be seen as a gift. A wonderful opportunity to pause, get clear on what’s really important and possibly, make some hard life choices and course-corrections.

Mantra in Sanskrit—the language of classical Hinduism--means a sacred utterance.

When I think about how much our internal language impacts our outward experience, I don’t know about you, but it makes me want to make sure my mantra is supporting--not dis-empowering me.

And, it inspires me to want to dig a little bit and ask my close friends and family what sacred utterance permeates their thoughts and world view.

I’d love to hear your life mantra, or your perspective on the current economic scenario. If you’re willing, share it here our Live Inside Out Facebook page.

P.S. I’d love to connect! If you’re free tonight from 7-8 p.m. CST, join us for our Free Personal Renewal Group class via telephone on Reconnecting with Who You Are. For women at all life stages; details below.

AN INVITATION: Interested in learning how you can experience more loving kindness towards yourself and tap into the power of self-care? Consider starting/joining one of our women's self-renewal circles, signing up for our FREE September 17th Global PRG Sampler Teleclass on Reconnecting with Who You Are or attending our life-changing October 2-4 Fall Women’s Self-Renewal Retreat at The Crossings.

Also, visit Live Inside Out and sign up to receive weekly tips on how to live more intentionally by becoming a fan on our Live Inside Out Facebook page.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to life balance and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly. For more information on Renee’s upcoming events, click here.

Photo: Renee Peterson Trudeau. St. Frances of Assisi Church, Ranchos de Taos, built in 1815.

Mindfulness

All last week I started my mornings walking around the Town Lake hike and bike trail in Austin, alone.

Being such an extrovert, I typically walk with a partner and use this early morning time for walk/talk meetings or rare windows to connect with friends I rarely get to see. After returning from my recent retreat though, I found my thoughts and demeanor so reflective that I had to be alone. I was craving my own, sweet, silent company.

As I walked and felt the gravel crunch under my Keens, dryness in my mouth and the sweat running down my back and arms, I wondered how many times have I done this walk? Hundreds? And how many times had my mind been somewhere else--focusing on the next approaching landmark, what type of taco I was going to pick up for breakfast or my growing "to do" list that awaited me back at the office?

On my walks last week, however, I played with the concept of mindfulness or "present moment living." I noticed the smells around me--strong body odor, rotting plants, sweet honeysuckle and how brilliant the colors of the blooming cactus and blossoming flowers were that lined the path--they literally seemed to explode before my eyes. At one point, I had to stop to really take in the beauty of these cactus blooms (above)--their intensity overwhelmed me.

I also focused on the muscles in my legs--in my thighs and calves and feet and marveled at how they worked together in harmony to effortlessly carry me the 3.6 mile distance around the lake.

I noticed a slightly metallic taste in my mouth and felt my breath changing, speeding up, slowing down, but always flowing.

The thought that I could not get out of my head was--how many times have I missed amazing gifts: moments, words, facial expressions, subtle nuances in communication, missed opportunities to connect, from not being mindful? From not really using my senses to full absorb and take in what was going on in the moment?

After my mindfulness experiment last week, I wanted to hear mindfulness guru/author John Kabat Zinn and found a link to an interview he did with Oprah--check it out if this speaks to you: http://www2.oprah.com/index.jhtml.

I love the poem they referred to during their interview. I'll include it here for you to enjoy and would love to hear how mindfulness looks throughout the course of your days.

P.S. More to come tomorrow on how my writing sabbatical has been going--the experience has been nothing less than intense. And surprising. And at times, very challenging. Surprise, surprise :).

Love After Love

The time will come when, with elation, you will greet yourself arriving at your own door,

in your own mirror, and each will smile at the other's welcome, and say, sit here. Eat.

You will love again the stranger who was yourself. Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart

to itself, to the stranger who has loved you all your life, whom you ignored for another,

who knows you by heart. Take down the love letters from the bookshelf, the photographs,

the desperate notes, peel your own image from the mirror. Sit. Feast on your life.

-- Derek Walcott