Re-Defining Balance

The other night at dinner my eight year-old son asked us what “ponder” means.

It got me thinking.

Lately, I’ve been getting clearer that I want to reduce the number of hours I work each week.

I am really feeling a strong pull to be even more present with my family and to have more time for family-related activities, like unscheduled downtime in the evenings and cooking (something my son loves to do, too).

While I have a flexible schedule and have created a work day that supports me in picking up my son from school most days –which I am incredibly grateful for-- the pace of my schedule is still too fast.

I want to have time to occasionally go to lunch with friends, take a break to enjoy my hammock or even read the newspaper (none of which I feel I have time to do now as I'm juggling hundreds of daily emails, phone calls, interviews, clients, events, deadlines and programs).

What I’m realizing is the schedule that worked great for me a year ago, doesn’t work for me now.

I define balance as having enough time, energy and resources for those things that matter most—at this particular life stage.

I’m acutely aware that life with my sweet second grader is fleeting and in no time at all, he’ll be leaving for college!

I also know that our wonderful, relaxed family meals every night looking out at the woods behind our house, the incredibly tender evening bed time routine and the thoughtful, heartfelt conversations I enjoy with my precious family are as good as it gets.

So, I intend to map out this new work schedule—which will start Sept. 1--this summer.

I don’t know how I’ll get there—two full-time national businesses do require a fair amount of energy. But, I’m not worried. I know the solution will present itself because I’m so clear and committed to what is most important to me right now and to how I want to spend my time.

And, because ultimately I want to teach my son not just how to observe, think or deliberate (which to me all denote a desired outcome) … I want to teach him about the importance of taking time to ponder life's questions. And I want the time and space to do the same.

JOIN US FOR A RETREAT: Would you like support in re-defining what balanced living means to you? Join us April 23-25 Refresh, Reclaim, Re-Balance: Women's Self-Renewal Retreat at The Crossings Spa & Resort in Austin, TX, but sign up today to ensure your spot. Or, escape to the cool mountains in August and join us at the beautiful Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health for our Self-Renewal Retreat in the MA Berkshires, Aug. 13-15. One of my favorite spots on the planet!

FREE DOWNLOAD of Courageous Parents, Confident Kids: Letting Go So You Both Can Grow--an exciting new anthology including a special section from Renee on the power of self-care. SIGN UP TODAY to get your free copy on April 19-21 only!

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to life balance and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: A view of the Boston Harbor from Boston's downtown greenway. A wonderful invitation to ponder what it might have been like to live in this area in the 1700's.

Spirituality

I had a very unusual upbringing (read more). My parents were what most people would call spiritual “seekers.”

Questions about how we connect to our divinity or the sacred --what most people refer to as spirituality--were constantly on the forefront of my parent’s minds (my siblings’ godparents include a beautiful Irish nun named Aine and Swami Satchidananda, the founder of Integral Yoga).

Although there was a lot of emotional discord in our house, we always knew God was very important to my parents and that there were many paths to reach him/her. Interestingly, my mother was raised Presbyterian and my father Methodist; they converted to Catholicism after their third child was born. From there, their journey continued on to include many different Eastern and Western teachings.

For me personally, to feel balance, equilibrium and a sense of well-being in my life, a spiritual “practice” is a necessity (you can read more about the fascinating research I did last summer around the topic of Everyday Spirituality).

And, when I speak to a corporation, organization or at a conference and am asked to lead a Life Balance workshop around the power of self-renewal, when I touch on the four areas of renewal—physical, mental, emotional, spiritual—and ask participants to focus on the area that most needs their attention right now, you know what most of them say?

Yep, spiritual renewal is at the top of their list.

Last night, while my husband performed with his Brazilian Samba group at Carnaval,
I had a much tamer night, relaxing at home and purging my closet (you know how it is when you get bit by the “purge bug”—you gotta run with it!).

While sorting through my closet and trying to decide what clothes I loved and what had to go, I listened to music and stumbled across this great panel discussion on Oprah’s Soul Series on Spirituality (check it out, definitely worth your time!).

A reoccurring theme that this panel touched on and that I hear many of my friends discuss—particularly parents—is how their religious upbringing scared them away from talking or thinking about spirituality, God or being a part of a spiritual community (whether that’s a church, a meditation or prayer circle or a spiritually-focused book group).

What about you? How were your raised? Are you currently involved in that church? Have you converted to a different religion? Do you talk to your kids about God or the sacred in everyday life? Do you have a daily spiritual practice?

I would love to hear about your personal story.

I really think when we share our own reflections around spirituality, it enriches and deepens our collective experience. I look forward to hearing a little about your journey.

Photo: My almost seven-year old after he reached the top of Enchanted Rock --by far, my greatest spiritual teacher.