Can I Be Grateful for What's Not Going My Way?

Sunday morning I woke up excited and looking forward to attending my good friend’s community potluck and documentary viewing when I discovered the keys to my car were in the glove compartment of my locked car and my husband--who had the second set—was out for the morning with our son. Fully dressed, coconut honey-lime fruit salad in hand, I realized my morning plans had just taken a giant nosedive—I was going nowhere.

There have been many times in my life when I’ve perceived things were going “wrong” (not my way) and later it turned out they were exactly perfect. BUT the other day—in the middle of a giant funk---I wondered, where can I find gratitude for what’s not going my way right now.

Today, I’m feeling called to pause and gratefully acknowledge (with just the tiniest bit of resentment):

• the business systems within my organization that no longer work and are asking to be reformed
• on-the-job inefficiencies that make you feel as if you want to pull your hair out
• family and relationship struggles and miscommunication that seem unnecessary
• learning in a way that feels “hard” (you know what I mean)

Why am I celebrating these frustrations? Because even though the silver lining from these hardships has yet to be revealed, my greatest learning--and growth--has come from mistakes, because the pearls that have come to me from living in the unknown have changed my life, and because I know that the ability to “reset” and start each day fresh and new is a gift unto itself. These struggles are calling me to develop a level of discernment unlike any I’ve had before and offering me the chance to really step into new ways of being.

Am I dealing with some things that are uncomfortable, challenging and messy right now? Yep.  Am I open to the growth that may come from these? Yeah (at least I think so).

What about you? Are you watching old systems, structures or ways of being topple to the ground and beg to be re-imagined or rebuilt?  I thought so. We’re all drinking from the same well.

Sending us all lots of compassion and courage as we stretch into the highest versions of who we are over the next month. And the next time you have a flat tire or life throws you a real sucker punch, pause and see if you can find even the tiniest seed of gratitude in the middle of seeming disaster.

P.S. Self-employed, live in Texas and ready for a new way of being with your business? I have a couple of spots left for my 12/14 Envision, Align, Expand: 2013 Visioning Retreat.(ony offered twice a year!).
 
I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

• Find Your Tribe: Join or learn to facilitate Personal Renewal Groups for women
• Attend a retreat/event this spring or hire Renee to create one for your group
• Learn about Live Inside Out and receive weekly inspiration on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
• Pick up my life balance title The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here or at your local bookstore
• Read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter or Career Management newsletter
• Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
• Empower Others: Schedule Renee for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
• Subscribe to The Journey, a weekly blog about coach/author/speaker Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to creating balance from the inside out.

Photo: a pumpkin cheesecake that didn't out as expected.

Gifts from 2011

As we move into 2012, I find myself feeling more quiet and at ease than I have in many years past. While there are many wonderful things coming to fruition around my work, more than anything, I'm just content with being with what is. And whatever may come.

As I close out 2011, what kept circling back for me was the many gifts I received over the past twelve months. Gifts of joy, learning, hardship, friendship, difficulty, perspective, compassion and the invitation to step into a New Way of Being.

I have a tendency to often move too quickly and not fully take in the moment.

So before I fully embrace 2012 and whatever it may bring, I pause to gratefully acknowledge just a few of the gifts I received from 2011 which were catalysts for my growth:

• many beautiful meditation sessions with my Moon Sisters Meditation Circle
• mentoring and support from many dear authors and colleagues including Jen Louden, Laura Berman Fortgang, Linda Bloom, Denise Barack and many others
• sweet gatherings with my Freedom Mastermind group and the work of Don Miguel Ruiz that guided many of our conversations
• my son's incredible, sweet friends, his soccer tribe and patient piano teacher
• the hundreds of divine yoga classes I enjoyed through my yoga home--Yoga Yoga--and my beautiful new friend that I met through this community
• the always nourishing Town Lake hike and bike trail AND the healing Texas hill country that is just steps away from our back door
• the amazing students in the New Way of Being program and how they supported my ability to step into more freedom at work!
• a new book deal with mind/body/spirit icon and publisher New World Library, my wonderful editor and my talented new book agent
• the amazing staff, students and communities at Esalen and Kripalu that make it possible for me to share teachings around the power of self-care
• all the brilliant graphic design/web support I received from the fabulous Amy Hufford/Stellar Planet and the divine Bella Guzman/High Wire Creative
• the Austin Women's Conference and all the wonderful women/men who made it possible for me to speak/participate in this inaugural event (hope it continues!)
• the changes at Primavera Montessori School (and brilliant, adaptable teachers) which brought us many gifts and opportunities for learning and ah-has
• the wake up call around our family's diet and what best supports each of in coming into greater harmony with our bodies (becoming GF was one!)
• my dear friend's generosity and her desire and commitment to our friendship's growth and evolution
• the opportunity to refinance our house at a historically low rate and to explore where we want to be in our fifties and beyond
• my summer writing sabbatical --the space, the time, the insights, the discipline it required
• my husband's unconditional support for my work--and his always interesting, helpful perspective
• the various tribes and communities that support my husband and son including the Austin Samba School and our church community
• my husband's great job (3 miles from our home)and the great team he works with--things which have allowed us to have more flow and space in our days
• Deb Kern's gorgeous spirit/heart and Daring Divas, Claudia Welch's approach to hormonal balance, Carolyn Scarborough's writing coaching, Dianna Amorde's move to S. Austin, Terri Moser's parenting support, Saudra Goldman's writing retreat --wonderful women and friends that support my heart's work
• Lost Pines Hyatt Resort and the Crossings for helping me teach and serve others so graciously
• our dear friends who accompanied us to Big Bend last spring--the place where I received inspiration for my new book
• the thousands of women worldwide who participate in and lead Personal Renewal Groups--for reminding me again and again of what really matters
• my five siblings who always challenge me to question and re-examine how I see the world
• my wondrous son who is my greatest teacher--whether he's sweet, sassy or surly--he's always happy to hold up a mirror to support my personal and spiritual growth!
• my beautiful aging body--which teaches me so much about self-love, self-compassion, the journey called life and my boundless soul

These gifts all asked me to stretch, fully show up AND many required a shift on my part. They gave me opportunities to live from the inside-out. And to let go of that which no longer served me. And so with gratitude I let the dead limbs from the past year fall away as I direct my energy to the new growth that now needs my care and attention.

May I attend to what's before me with grace and power.

Have you heard about the I CHOOSE LOVE public service campaign? It's a reminder that when we come from love--one of the most powerful yet underutilized forces on the planet--we have the ability to transcend fear and remember what we're really hear to do: give and receive love. Learn more and order a tshirt (at cost).

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

• Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Personal Renewal Groups for women
• Attend a retreat/event including my Feb. 10th Empowered Entrepreneur Retreat and my April Esalen and June Kripalu retreats
• Learn about Live Inside Out and receive weekly inspiration on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
• Pick up my life balance title The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
• Read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
• Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
• Empower Others: Schedule Renee for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization

Subscribe to The Journey,  a weekly blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to creating balance from the inside out.  

Photo: Renee Peterson Trudeau, a field on the outskirts of Taos, NM. Taken on our family vacation last August. 

A Grateful Heart

I was flipping through our family calendar this morning, which is filled with quotes from Pema Chodron, to see what’s scheduled for May. The quote from her book The Places that Scare You, jumped out at me:

“Rejoicing in ordinary things is not sentimental or trite. It actually takes guts. Each time we drop our complaints and allow everyday good fortune to inspire us, we enter the warrior’s world. We can do this even at the most difficult moments. Everything we see, hear, taste and smell has the power to strengthen and uplift us.”

I’ve been overflowing with gratitude all morning. It’s so delicious. It has the capacity to move us into this feeling state that can actually keep expanding and growing (it reminds me of that Star Trek episode, The Trouble with Tribbles, where the “tribbles” just kept multiplying!).

I returned late last night from facilitating a weekend Self-Renewal Retreat for women at Kripalu Yoga and Wellness Center in Mass. I didn’t bring my laptop, purposely slowed way down and made probably no more than 5 phone calls over the five days I was gone.

And while it was a work trip, I still spent a good deal of time soaking in the cool Berkshire mountain air, walking, doing yoga/dance, meditating, having heartfelt conversation with my team members, soaking in the latest perspectives/teachings on wellness, yogic lifestyle, stress management and I even got to dance with and receive a hug from the beautiful Mother Maya, who teaches Living Ahimsa—a vow which encourages us all to practice non-violence towards self and others. A particularly relevant and thoughtful message given the major political news I returned to today.

After finishing an expansive meditation this morning (it’s amazing how much more spacious our minds can become when we “unplug” for an extended period), I could feel waves of gratitude spreading and amplifying through my body. This morning I paused to celebrate and give thanks…

For the gift of sight and to be able to drink in all the green growth of springtime.

For the amazing, other-worldly natural foods cuisine the Kripalu kitchen staff lovingly prepared for the more than 700 people who were on-site this past weekend.

For the supportive tribe and community that helped care for Jonah while I was away leading the retreat (and that always step up to support me when I travel for work).

To my sweet, wonderful husband and all the ways he supports our family’s physical, emotional, spiritual and financial well-being.

For the opportunity to help women reconnect with who they are and live from the inside out … and for the self-care ripples that occur when they return to their families, communities and workplaces.

For the brilliant team of women and students I get to work with day in and day out—what blessings each of you are in my life!

For the abundance of personal and professional support that surrounds me and continually flows my way.

For the deep, nourishing friendships I have cultivated that sustain me on so many levels. I appreciate these more every day and am so grateful for the opportunity to be vulnerable and show up “warts and all.”

For the myriad of life experiences I’ve had which were catalysts for helping me grow and evolve into the person I am becoming (let the journey continue!).

For the life-changing event I had at Dachau in 1996 which helped me awaken to the life I truly desire and my calling to help us all come into balance.

For the amazing connections and synchronicities that occur daily in my life that support me in remembering who I really am and what I’m here to do.

To my son and my siblings/extended family for being such amazing teachers and for never letting me fall into status quo or get “too comfortable!”

To my sweet, wonderful body and soul which allow me to experience what it’s like to be human, be spirit and all the vastness that lies in between.

P.S. I’ll be back at Kripalu Oct. 14-16 leading another Self-Renewal Retreat if you want to experience some of this yumminess and see the blaze of fall color!

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event or workshop
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, and read my April Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration
The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photos: After finishing a full and intense weekend of teaching and facilitation, I relaxed on the front lawn at Kripalu looking out at the Berkshire mountains while enjoying a piece of vegan pumpkin pie and hot rosehips/lavender tea.

Thank You Nonnie!

I’m officially declaring September as Gratitude Month in honor of Nonnie, my maternal grandmother Mabel Rebecca Harrison, who passed in 2005 and would have been 99 on September 1st.

She was an amazingly strong woman, mother, teacher, business owner and all-around renegade for her times.

She had a huge presence in and impact on my life and the lives of my six siblings.

She taught us to read when we were very young, encouraged us to use daily
affirmations--her favorite: “I am healthy, wealthy and wise”--nurtured us all through her amazing cooking, blazed the trail as single working mother/entrepreneur, constantly extolled the virtues of positive thinking –“if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all,” took us on trips that extended from the pyramids in Egypt to Big Ben in London, and taught us a lot about the power of gratitude.

My siblings and I often drove her crazy (picture a sweet but strong seventy-something Nonnie chasing four wild boys ranging in age from two to fifteen) and I know she thought my mom, her only child, was off her rocker to have had seven children! But, as the years passed—particularly after my mom’s sudden and unexpected death in 2000--we became her greatest joy and frequently made trips to visit her in Houston.

So my brothers and I will be gathering tomorrow evening to celebrate Nonnie and thank her for teaching us to remember the power of thanksgiving—as a way of life. (We were going to cook a grand southern style feast in honor of Nonnie, but my brilliant 7-year old reminded us: “Nonnie loved Luby’s.” So, good is good enough.)

And, in Nonnies’ honor, I invite you to spread the word (put Facebook to good use!) that September is officially Gratitude Month. What are you grateful for today?

AN INVITATION: Interested in reconnecting with who you are and feeling more grateful and joyful every day? Consider starting/joining one of our women's self-renewal circles, signing up for our FREE September 17th Global PRG Sampler Teleclass on Reconnecting with Who You Are or attending our life-changing October 2-4 Fall Women’s Self-Renewal Retreat at The Crossings (early bird rate ends Aug. 31st).
Also, visit Live Inside Out and sign up to receive weekly tips on how to live more intentionally by becoming a fan on our Live Inside Out Facebook page.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to life balance and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly. For more information on Renee’s upcoming events, click here.

Photo: Circa 1975. Nonnie's only child, Juliana Harrison(my mom), with two of my younger brothers in our ranch-style home in San Antonio.

Mothering

I attended a really wonderful "active art" event last night in Austin in honor of Mother's Day, called Mothering: The Act Of. The evening was the brainchild of my creative friends Lynn and Aimee. We were asked to reflect on Mothering as an act (who mothers us, who we mother, how we mother ourselves). Here some of the posts from the event (there was a live blog set up all evening as well as many other interactive art projects): http://theactofmothering.blogspot.com/.
I ended up writing (or rather scribbling) a short piece that came to me early Sunday morning at the coast. Like many, I didn't have a Hallmark card mother and have a wide range of feelings around the most important woman in my life.

What came to me though (rather strongly through a dream about my grandmother), was GRATITUDE. For the many gifts my mom did give me (both directly and indirectly) and how these "presents" initiated gifts I have bestowed upon myself.

Gratitude
You gave me compassion for others. I gave me compassion for self.

You stressed the importance of achieving. I feel the importance of being.

You nurtured my strong mind. I learned to nurture my tender heart.

You taught me the importance of service to others. I learned to serve without sacrificing myself.

You introduced me to the shadow. I have learned to embrace ALL of me.

You fed me with music, art and philosophy. I have learned how important it is to share these gifts with others.

You gave me a love for good food and cooking. I’ve learned to love myself by eating foods that truly nourish me.

You instilled in me ways to cope and survive. I learned how to build community and thrive.

You gave me independence. I gave myself permission to ask for and receive help.

You showed me the absolutely necessity for self-care. I embraced self-care and made it part of my day-to-day life.

You taught me to be a seeker. I learned I don't need to know all the answers.

You instilled in me the desire to find God. I’ve come to know God dwells within.

You taught me how to open my mind and be accepting of others. I’ve learned how essential it is that above all else—I love and accept myself.

Notes from Mother’s Day 2008 ...scribbles from an early Sunday morning on the Gulf Coast.

I am 42, my mother Juliana died suddenly from congestive heart failure in 2000, 30 days before my wedding day. She was mother to seven children, an artist, musician, nurse and teacher. And, she battled clinical depression for more than 30 years.