Time

This past weekend I attended a Yoga for Wellness workshop at my favorite yoga studio with the beautiful, passionate Italian-born Mirka Kraftsow.

Most think of yoga as a series of postures, but movement or “asana” is only one of the eight limbs of yoga. These past few days, we studied some of the other limbs or teachings of this 5,000 year old philosophy.

After a slow, yummy weekend of gentle movement, meditation, singing, journaling and study of ancient yogic teachings, I just couldn’t bring myself to jump back into “business as usual” Monday morning. So, I took the morning off and created space for contemplation.

Sunday evening as my husband and I sat on our back porch under the stars after my son had gone to bed, I commented, “I have so much to do tomorrow, am I crazy to take 5 hours off tomorrow for spiritual renewal and reflection?” His reply, “Is there anything you have to do that’s really more important?”

I think my strong desire to slow down my “doing” this morning and just “be” (read more from my post on this theme), was my rebellious attempt to in some way suspend time.

One of my favorite things in the world is the opportunity –alone and with my family-- to enjoy expanses of unscheduled time.

So in that vein, I moved slowly … locked “time” in the garden shed with the rusty old tools … made myself a big mug of Moroccan green tea … watched the rain … meditated on the back porch … lit a favorite candle … leisurely reviewed my notes and drawings from the workshop … at some salted cashews … and avoided looking at the clock as much as possible.

In some ways I feel it’s my responsibility-- after attending a rich, deep workshop like this-- to take time off the next day to give these “seeds” some fertilizer, some space to grow before I returned to everyday life. (Nothing like three hours on the computer replying to countless emails to kill a fresh, new idea or perspective!)

One of the Niyamas (a limb of yoga and set of ethical guidelines that when practiced can bring greater awareness and insight to our lives) we explored this past weekend that most deeply resonated with me is Ishvara Pranidhana, which means to surrender. Or, let go of our need to control.

And while I’ve come a long way around control, I still have a long way to go. But I’m noticing the more I can let go—around my son’s food allergies, my husband’s lack of exercise, or scheduling at work—my mind is less busy. My thoughts are fewer and far between. I feel more peaceful and trusting and my overall emotional and spiritual well-being is greatly enhanced. Funny how that happens!?

And, I’m realizing in this moment as I write this, that choosing to chuck my work responsibilities this a.m. and just “let go” was a great way to honor this insight. And hopefully to strengthen it.

Ahhhh, a noise: it’s time. I hear her banging on the old tool shed door. I guess I need to go and let her out. She’s getting impatient. And who knows what would happen if I forgot about her altogether.

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The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly. (Note: This blog post appeared in a similar format in 2010. It is so timely, I had to share it again.)

Painting: Salvador Dali, painter, 1904-1989

Honoring Your Path

I have just finished speaking at several national events and retreats on the topic of how to create balance from the "inside out" (the idea that fancy Blackberries and new organizing systems are truly just time management band-aids; creating true well-being is an inside-out job).

I believe that inherent to our journey to inner peace and well-being, is the necessity to constantly challenge our own beliefs and assumptions. Particularly about how we choose to navigate our careers--and where we choose to direct our time and energy.

One of the things I most enjoyed about my travels during October, was the opportunity to meet and visit with amazing, inspiring women--also authors/speakers and entrepreneurs like myself-- from around the world.

Arianne de Bonvoisin a new friend from NY, just released a new book that explores the concept of "change" and how to navigate this constant successfully, Jen Groover, a savvy PA entrepreneur and mom to twins, has created a "purse kingdom" based on an idea she refused to let go of, Cathy Greenburg in AZ, used her life tragedies to inspire a wonderful series of books that help people to understand happiness--and what motivates people who are, Galia Gichon, in NY, a former stockbroker and mom to young kids who has created some great "down to earth" personal finance tools for people like you and me and editor Erin Casey in TX, (under Success magazine) has launched a wonderful new magazine for women called Success for Women.

Meeting all of these women--many moms like myself--really stretched me in new ways. It made me pause--and reflect--on how I have consciously set up my life and businesses. It challenged me to review my commitments to myself and my family about what I'm willing and not willing to do to support my work goals.

I am active in a wonderful professional organization for self-employed women called the Business+Balance Success Group (look for their new web site next month!). Frequently I hear entrepreneurs beat themselves up about how much more they should be doing or how often they compare themselves to others (read "Are You Kind to Yourself?" to hear more on this topic.)

All of us are on our own unique path. Everyone's journey--and moment-to-moment personal and professional choices--will look vastly different, depending on our life stage, our "non-negotiables," the age (s) of our kids, our personalities/innate talents and how much we’re willing to work.

Ultimately, I believe--as I think my colleagues do as well--that we can only truly hold on to who we are and maintain equilibrium, if the choices we make are coming from our internal guidance system--not from "shoulds" or external demands.

I'm reminded of one of my favorite quotes from Carol Orsborn, "Your ordinary self is enough." Because there will always be more work to do or more emails to return. It's up to us to remember our worth is not measured by how busy we are, but by who we are. At least that’s what my inner wisdom tells me.

How about you? Is there anything you need to change about how you work to better honor your path?

Expanses of Unscheduled Time

Last weekend I had one of the most “decadent” and enjoyable weekends I’ve had in months. I had wanted to go out of town for the holiday weekend, but my husband convinced me we should just stay in town and take it easy.

Even though we’re very mindful of what we say “yes” to on the weekends, often, Sunday evening rolls around and we don’t feel truly rested and nourished. The weekend was simply too scheduled.

During the recent holiday weekend, my husband and I took turns taking naps (while the other played with our six-year old), I got a massage, we read, we made some great fresh summer dishes that we shared with our neighbors, saw a movie, spent time going on walks and gardening as a family and for the most part, just hung out and let our days unfold. It felt luxurious! (Sometimes cleaning out the sock drawer is just the soul food we need!)

As I age, I find the less I have to do, the happier I am. And when I can create “expanses of unscheduled time” in my life and my family’s life, magic happens. The ordinary becomes extraordinary. I’ve heard life coach Cheryl Richardson (http://www.cherylrichardson.com/) say that our quality of life is enhanced by what we take out of our schedule/days, not by what we put in. I can’t agree more.

I have been planning for the last 6 months to allow my schedule some space to slow down considerably in July and August. While I will be working during those months, I’ll be on a mini writing sabbatical in July and part of August and am really looking forward to claiming chunks of unscheduled time during these slower months. And, I can’t wait to see what unfolds from these “closets of intentional space.” I hope you can find some time to do the same.

P.S. Talking about balance, I encourage you to check out Stew Friedman’s (head of Wharton School of Business’ Work/Life Initiative) new book http://www.totalleadership.org/. I met him when I attended a workshop he led in Austin, TX last week at Bazaarvoice and was really excited and encouraged by his “whole person” approach to work/life effectiveness and leadership. It’s incredibly refreshing to meet a business teacher/leader who advocates for self-care and alignment with personal values and to hear him share about the profound impact the birth of his first child had on his world view and desire to promote a new way to lead. Read a recent New York Times article on Stew’s recent talk and approach here: http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/29/business/smallbusiness/29shift.html?em&ex=1212379200&en=2781ffd821336324&ei=5087%0A. Three cheers for Mr. Friedman!