In fall 2008 I was nuts.
Launching my first book, coordinating our global Personal Renewal Group program and running two coaching/consulting businesses was eating my lunch.
I felt like I was in the middle of a tug of war (with each of my businesses at opposite ends), and, it was a no-win scenario.
Every day in my meditation/prayer time, I would ask, “Help me. I desire to see this in a new light. I desire to work in a new way.” And, finally—after a lot of inner work—I did have a breakthrough, a release, and I breathed and all was well again. Like most big shifts, it came from “how I chose to see the situation,” rather than an actual change in the situation itself!
Well, round two. I’m back again. And, while I’m really content with most aspects of my life and many would say I’ve done a decent, maybe even good job of balancing my work demands and family/personal needs, this period of unplugging* has shown me in a few short days that things need to change: I desire an even slower, simpler life and work pace. And, I desire to spend even less time online.
I just wrote about the concept of going with the flow in my recent newsletter (read more). And while I believe and live this principle, I’m realizing that there are degrees of going with the flow ... there’s going for a Sunday drive with the windows rolled down, your hair blowing in the wind and an open mind about where the road may take you ... and then, there is taking your hands off the wheel.
Trusting, releasing and surrendering at such a high level (to God or the Universe), that going with the flow actually begins to look like not driving at all!
Does this sound crazy? Am I making any sense?
Years ago I was working with some brilliant consultants/friends on a product launch.
They had lined up some important meetings in New York with three key decision makers and felt strongly we needed to head to the east coast to meet them right away. My gut was screaming (literally—I was throwing up in the bathroom) that the timing was not right, we were pushing too hard and we needed to wait. But I wanted to honor their expertise, and after three cancelled and flights due to a snowstorm we finally arrived in the big apple.
Taking to the receptionist in a big, sterile office building downtown the following day, we were informed that Janet, our 1:00 had just left to go home with a stomach virus (and no, they didn’t care that we had flown there to meet her from Austin).
Our next meeting with the head of a powerful media group went well—but we found out shortly after our return home, that her father passed away the day after we left and she would be leaving her company for an extended sabbatical. And while these meetings weren’t fruitful, I am still grateful today for this experience and the huge reminder to always, always listen to my inner knowing, and to pay close attention when things are not flowing.
We teach what we need to learn. And coming into balance has been a life-long struggle for me. It’s also something I’m really dedicated to. (Read Is Ms. Balance Out of Balance?)
I remember a therapist asking me in my twenties as I sat on her flowered, aging couch, “Your emotional well-being is of paramount importance; there’s nothing that matters more. What decisions are you willing to make to preserve this?”
I think she’d be happy to see me now. And to witness my willingness to do anything and everything to not only maintain, but to enhance and evolve my sense of peace and well-being, both inside and out.
So back to the meditation cushion for me. And while I don’t have a clue as to what this new way of working and living will look like in the fall, I know my desire for more ease and flow is strong (overwhelmingly so). And I trust—like always—the answer will come. In its own good time.
*From June 6-July 28, I am officially unplugged and out of the office to work on a new writing project. I’ll still be blogging, but only every two weeks. But hop on over to Live Inside Out for daily dialogue on how to live more intentionally.
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The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.
Photo: Me in my favorite hammock chair. I'm writing an outline for a new project and enjoying a banana-coconut smoothie while listening to the morning doves and drinking in the thousand shades of green in our backyard. I could get used to starting my day like this!