I celebrated my 45th birthday over this past weekend. But I didn’t feel social (unusual for me).
I just felt a strong pull to nest, rest and reflect—read more—so much so that I cancelled my long-anticipated workshop with Shiva Rea and instead spent a good part of Sunday alone enjoying a massage, a hot aromatherapy bath and a long rest.
When I awoke I was overcome with gratitude for my sweet 45-year old body and was inspired to write a letter to my dear old friend.
Dear 45-year old body:
I love you. I really do. I’m sorry it has taken me so long to arrive here, but regardless, I have!
I appreciate you in so many ways.
-I love you radiant face that gets more interesting and playful the older you get (and fascinating neck--it seems as if you're developing a personality of your own!).
-I love you sweet soft belly just the way you are. And, I’m amazed by your ability to grow a child that is now almost up to my chin!
-I love you open, inviting and accepting smile (and thank you teeth for staying so cavity-free!).
-I adore you bright blue green eyes that are filled with a mixture of insight, depth and curiosity.
-I love you full sweet, strong upper arms that give great hugs, will never be willowy and were inherited from Grandma Harrison (so I’m told).
-I love you constantly changing, ever-evolving torso that has shifted through stages including: strong and sexy, pudgy and pouty, feminine and flirty, tired and disconnected and fluid and fabulous!
-I love you hands (Nonnie’s hands) and the way you have supported me in writing, painting, expressing myself musically, cooking and serving others.
-I love you strong, sexy legs and flexible hips that can move, balance and support me in dancing and doing yoga for hours.
-I love you rapidly changing, looks-different-every-day skin—in all of your various stages, colors, creases, patterns, spots and spring to summer styles and looks (I promise I’ll start wearing sun screen more often to protect you!).
-I love you amazing feet—hail to the feet! You’ve carried me for thousands of miles from Big Sur to Egypt, from Oaxaca to Ephesus and around Lady Bird Lake twice a week for the last twenty years.
-I love you sweet, healthy breasts that have helped me embrace my femininity and have brought me from maiden to motherhood to middle age (oh the stories you hold!).
-I love you sometimes cranky, but always lovable knees--especially the small crinkles that are just starting to crash the party and how they suddenly make their entrance when I do a downward dog.
Sweet body, I so appreciate how you house my soul and allow me to live fully, laugh often, embrace pleasure, express love to those around me and enjoy motherhood, marriage, traveling, dancing, hiking and wrestling with my 8 year old.
I am so grateful for your vibrancy, energy and overall health. I promise to continue to listen and respond to your needs and desires in the coming years. And above all, I will do my best to love you through all the changes and evolutions that are yet to come.
Much love and deep gratitude—your best friend, Renee
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The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.
Photo: Me and my shadow at Pedernales State Park, December 2010.