The Journey

A New Simplicity

2012-01-22T16:09:00.000-06:00

I attended an awesome women’s retreat yesterday with the fabulous Anita Johnson and the divine Elissa Shapiro.

What came through loud and clear for me at the retreat was a desire to yes, simplify and do less (read more), but also to use less energy in all that I do.

I feel a calling for what I’m terming “A New Simplicity.” Not a fluffy, this-would-be-a-nice-way-to-live where we purge our closets and garages, but a New Way of Being that is coming from necessity. The necessity to purge and streamline our thinking, our doing, our giving and receiving, and of course, our stuff. We’re entering a time of the unknown—a whole new frontier—that I believe requires us to have more space to breathe, think, dream and digest.

Daphne Rose Kingma, author of the beautiful The Ten Things To Do When Your Life Falls Apart says, “When we live simply we are able to rest in the peace that simple living brings: a quieting of the endless mental chatter and the agitation to have more, a simplicity of movement and action in the passage of each day. Time to sit still, to talk with your children, to stare into your lover’s eyes, to read a book, to water a tree, to pray.” And, I would add, to just be--so we can actually integrate into our hearts and souls what we’re experiencing moment to moment.

So this week simplicity may look like calling a friend and changing a previous “yes” to a “no,” to create more space and flow, voicing clear boundaries to my clients around my time, consciously building in “unscheduled” weekends and evenings on our family calendar, reviewing February commitments and seeing if any course corrections are needed, skipping my regular Sunday yoga class so I can be rest in stillness for a precious hour, standing up for what I need in the moment, and serving black beans and tortillas for dinner.

As part of my book research I keep running across studies that share our level of happiness and contentment takes a nose dive when we have too many choices OR are faced with making too many decisions in one day.

Here’s to a week imbued with simplicity. I’ll let you know how it goes and would love to hear how you keep it simple.

P.S. Are you a parent and looking for some top-notch, high level support and inspiration this year? I love to partner with other entrepreneurs and expand their success and am excited to be involved in Carrie Contey's new Evolve 2012 program and Lisa Byrne's wonderful free MAPP spring series.

Join us and CHOOSE LOVE in 2012: The I Choose Love public service campaign is a reminder that when we come from love--one of the most powerful yet underutilized forces on the planet--we have the ability to transcend fear and remember what we're really hear to do: give and receive love. Learn more and order a tshirt (at cost).

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Personal Renewal Groups for women
Attend a retreat/event including my Feb. 10th Empowered Entrepreneur Retreat and my April Esalen and June Kripalu retreats
Learn about Live Inside Out and receive weekly inspiration on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
Pick up my life balance title The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
Read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
Empower Others: Schedule Renee for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization

Subscribe to The Journey, a weekly blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to creating balance from the inside out.

Photo: Black beans--simple goodness and highly nutritious! What my family will be eating this week.

Gifts from 2011

2012-01-15T21:04:00.001-06:00

As we move into 2012, I find myself feeling more quiet and at ease than I have in many years past. While there are many wonderful things coming to fruition around my work, more than anything, I'm just content with being with what is. And whatever may come.

As I close out 2011, what kept circling back for me was the many gifts I received over the past twelve months. Gifts of joy, learning, hardship, friendship, difficulty, perspective, compassion and the invitation to step into a New Way of Being.

I have a tendency to often move too quickly and not fully take in the moment.

So before I fully embrace 2012 and whatever it may bring, I pause to gratefully acknowledge just a few of the gifts I received from 2011 which were catalysts for my growth:

many beautiful meditation sessions with my Moon Sisters Meditation Circle
mentoring and support from many dear authors and colleagues including Jen Louden, Laura Berman Fortgang, Linda Bloom, Denise Barack and many others
sweet gatherings with my Freedom Mastermind group and the work of Don Miguel Ruiz that guided many of our conversations
my son's incredible, sweet friends, his soccer tribe and patient piano teacher
the hundreds of divine yoga classes I enjoyed through my yoga home--Yoga Yoga--and my beautiful new friend that I met through this community
the always nourishing Town Lake hike and bike trail AND the healing Texas hill country that is just steps away from our back door
the amazing students in the New Way of Being program and how they supported my ability to step into more freedom at work!
a new book deal with mind/body/spirit icon and publisher New World Library, my wonderful editor and my talented new book agent
the amazing staff, students and communities at Esalen and Kripalu that make it possible for me to share teachings around the power of self-care
all the brilliant graphic design/web support I received from the fabulous Amy Hufford/Stellar Planet and the divine Bella Guzman/High Wire Creative
the Austin Women's Conference and all the wonderful women/men who made it possible for me to speak/participate in this inaugural event (hope it continues!)
the changes at Primavera Montessori School (and brilliant, adaptable teachers) which brought us many gifts and opportunities for learning and ah-has
the wake up call around our family's diet and what best supports each of in coming into greater harmony with our bodies (becoming GF was one!)
my dear friend's generosity and her desire and commitment to our friendship's growth and evolution
the opportunity to refinance our house at a historically low rate and to explore where we want to be in our fifties and beyond
my summer writing sabbatical --the space, the time, the insights, the discipline it required
my husband's unconditional support for my work--and his always interesting, helpful perspective
the various tribes and communities that support my husband and son including the Austin Samba School and our church community
my husband's great job (3 miles from our home)and the great team he works with--things which have allowed us to have more flow and space in our days
Deb Kern's gorgeous spirit/heart and Daring Divas, Claudia Welch's approach to hormonal balance, Carolyn Scarborough's writing coaching, Dianna Amorde's move to S. Austin, Terri Moser's parenting support, Saudra Goldman's writing retreat --wonderful women and friends that support my heart's work
Lost Pines Hyatt Resort and the Crossings for helping me teach and serve others so graciously
our dear friends who accompanied us to Big Bend last spring--the place where I received inspiration for my new book
the thousands of women worldwide who participate in and lead Personal Renewal Groups--for reminding me again and again of what really matters
my five siblings who always challenge me to question and re-examine how I see the world
my wondrous son who is my greatest teacher--whether he's sweet, sassy or surly--he's always happy to hold up a mirror to support my personal and spiritual growth!
my beautiful aging body--which teaches me so much about self-love, self-compassion, the journey called life and my boundless soul

These gifts all asked me to stretch, fully show up AND many required a shift on my part. They gave me opportunities to live from the inside-out. And to let go of that which no longer served me. And so with gratitude I let the dead limbs from the past year fall away as I direct my energy to the new growth that now needs my care and attention.

May I attend to what's before me with grace and power.

Have you heard about the I CHOOSE LOVE public service campaign? It's a reminder that when we come from love--one of the most powerful yet underutilized forces on the planet--we have the ability to transcend fear and remember what we're really hear to do: give and receive love. Learn more and order a tshirt (at cost).

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Personal Renewal Groups for women
Attend a retreat/event including my Feb. 10th Empowered Entrepreneur Retreat and my April Esalen and June Kripalu retreats
Learn about Live Inside Out and receive weekly inspiration on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
Pick up my life balance title The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
Read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
Empower Others: Schedule Renee for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization

Subscribe to The Journey, a weekly blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to creating balance from the inside out.

Photo: Renee Peterson Trudeau, a field on the outskirts of Taos, NM. Taken on our family vacation last August.

Reflecting

2011-12-31T14:18:00.001-06:00

It's Thursday morning, December 29th. I'm sitting in front of our fireplace in my floral pajamas with a mug of chamomile tea and an inspirational Osho Zen card deck.

I've arranged for my son to attend an all-day winter nature camp so I can write. I have agreed to deliver a first draft of my manuscript to my publisher by January so the holidays have been a mix of book deadlines interspersed with family time (an interesting cocktail!).

But today what is calling me is not my unfinished chapters (that still need a lot of massaging), but my old journals, my colored pencils and sketchpad, drawings from the last 12 months and scribbled insights and musings from 2011--all scattered across my dark wooden coffee table.

After the guilt around not "getting busy" subsides, I give myself permission to surrender and embrace my natural rhythms. I settle into a comfortable spot near the fire, wrap myself in a soft blanket and allow the signal to travel through my body that yes, I agree, it's time to slow to a snail's pace.

My desire for reflection this week is so strong, it feels like the pull you experience while standing in a strong tide. Constant, persistent and visceral.

I don't want to produce, I want to pause. I don't want to create, I want to dream. To observe and take note of what needs to whither and die--and what needs to be allowed to grow and bloom.

I want to simply be. To take sweet time to gently acknowledge all the lessons learned in 2011 and to sit quietly with all the joys, suffering, light and shadow (read more), achievements and failures. I want to invite all of these experiences and emotions to sit close by my side, like a small child before they finally wiggle away and run off to play.

So often it feels like we're "speed living" --moving quickly through the motions, skimming the surface--instead of allowing ourselves to drop deeply into the moment.

Later that day while savoring a walk around the lake with a dear friend in 70 degree weather, I knew I had made the right decision. The time for writing will come. But the opportunities to be quiet, reflect and go inward are precious and deserve to be heeded when they call.

Reflection exercises: Some of the things I'm doing this week during my time of reflection include creating a "Gifts from 2011" list, writing a letter of forgiveness to someone I want to make amends with and reflecting with my partner and friends on ways we can all simplify our lives even more. I'd love to hear any rituals you do during reflective time (and of course, doing absolutely nothing is best of all!).

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Personal Renewal Groups for women
Attend a retreat/event including my April Esalen or June Kripalu retreats
Learn about Live Inside Out and receive weekly inspiration on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
Pick up my life balance title The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
Read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
Empower Others: Schedule Renee for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization

Subscribe to The Journey, a weekly blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to creating balance from the inside out.

What Really Matters?

2011-12-13T20:34:00.002-06:00

Yesterday morning I found myself standing at my open front door staring out at a beautiful oak tree. Bathed in sunlight, I held a cup of lemon ginger tea in one hand and my to-do list in the other.

I was waiting for a friend that I was helping out of a financial jam, and wondering how crucial this hot list of tasks I was holding--that had seemed so important earlier in the day--really were. (This week is a big one for me as I’m attempting to wrap up all my projects so I can begin finalizing my manuscript which is due in January.)

The moment felt big and pregnant (ever have those?) and I had the strong sensation that I was being asked to stop everything … and become present to what life was trying to tell me.

Over the last few days, I’ve been surrounded by close friends and dear acquaintances who are struggling with big stuff. Life or death stuff. Fork in the road stuff. Questions that don’t have easy or quick answers stuff.

One of my son’s teachers lost her 19 year-old son in a fatal car accident right before Thanksgiving (this touched me deeply as my brother was the same age when he died). A close colleague is struggling financially to pay even her basic bills. Another friend has been battling depression and is in limbo around her life purpose and direction. One of my childhood friends is navigating the holidays with her kids after the loss of her husband 5 months ago. Another dear friend, a mother to two young kids, is working herself to the bone and having a hard time seeing a way out of a never ending cycle of overwork.

As I'm standing here in the doorway, I'm racked with the questions, "What can I do? How can I best help?" And as I write personal notes to them, leave messages and emails, offer prayers and resources--I'm reminded that this work, however small and insignificant it may feel--is more important than any task, deadline or to-do. Being here for each other is the most important thing there is.

So my prayer as I move through the week is “Guide me how to best serve and help my brothers and sisters who are in my life right now." Because we don't have to go to Africa or a low-income area or a disadvantaged school to find people in need.

Help is needed right here, right now and often those whose paths we cross daily are hurting and in dire need of a kind word or deed. But unless we drop the "Gotta get it done" mentality long enough to be fully present and *really* see those around us, we'll miss the call for help altogether. Like I almost did this past week.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
Attend a retreat/event including my Fri., Dec.16 Reflect & Re-Imagine Small Business Owners Retreat
Learn about Live Inside Out and receive weekly inspiration on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
Pick up my life balance title The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
Read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
Empower Others: Schedule Renee for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization

Subscribe to The Journey, a weekly blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to creating balance from the inside out.

Photo: Texas oak tree bathed in sunlight, Dreamstime.

Do It Different

2011-11-20T20:13:00.001-06:00

Over the past two weekends I saw some amazing art at E.A.S.T. (I feel so lucky to live in Austin--a progressive oasis in the center of Texas; our tourism plug for years was "Austin, what the rest of the country had in mind!")

Having the opportunity to visit these artists' avant-garde work and home spaces and be reminded that there is no "right way" to live or work was powerful. And, drinking in this visual feast of multimedia, oil paintings, woodwork and sculpture, pottery and glassblowing inspired me to re-visit one of my favorite slogans: "Do it different."

Do it different: meaning shaking life up, looking at it sideways, turning things upside down, changing how you do and see things, challenging how you've set up your life and trying on a new perspectives or way of being.

Whether it's small (driving a new route to or from work or school) or big (starting to walk or meditate each morning before work or eating different foods)--"doing it different" makes me feel more vibrant, grateful to be alive and appreciative that I get to create the day (and life) I desire.

There's a lot of research around how much our brains benefit when we "do it different." We actual create new neural pathways when we mix it up (ever wonder why your 65-year old friend who is always signing up for new cooking classes and loves to learn the latest dance moves is sharp as a tack?!).

Much of our daily routine is rote. We've fallen into habitual, unconscious ways of doing, being and seeing (from what we eat for breakfast and how we start our day to how we approach work or parenting and relate to our partners and family members).

During our New Way of Being course, 70 women and men from around the world explored what a "New Way of Being" would look and feel like. For five weeks we asked ourselves, "If we dropped our old ways of thinking and seeing and released habitual ways of being, what would it be like to step into a higher, more evolved version of who we are?"

It was quite a powerful experience--even just asking the question proved to be a catalyst for many. (Note: It's not too late to participate; you can download the classes and listen anytime from anywhere.)

As I prepare to return to my manuscript and begin work on my new book next month, I'm curious how the New Way of Being journey will affect this new project. I'll keep you posted on what unfolds.

P.S. Every year, I really enjoy "doing it different" around how we celebrate the holidays. Interested in joining me? Read more.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
Attend a retreat/event including my Fri., Dec.16 Reflect & Re-Imagine Small Business Owners Retreat
Join the dialogue and receive weekly inspiration on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
Pick up my life balance title The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
Read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
Empower Others: Schedule Renee for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization

Subscribe to The Journey, a weekly blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to creating balance from the inside out.

Painting/photo: Darvin Jones. One of the many amazing artists exhibiting at E.A.S.T.

Surrendering

2011-11-06T07:49:00.002-06:00

This past week I participated in an amazing one-day conference for 2000 women. It was an inaugural event and I was delivering the closing keynote, a workshop session to 300 women, my organization was staffing/working a booth and I was signed up to do two book signings (I know, too much …next year I’ll scale back!).

Everything was cruising along fine. The afternoon before the conference began, I was at the convention center unloading boxes and setting up our booth with my assistant, coordinating details for the next day, preparing for sound/AV checks and getting ready to go home, wrap up work and change for a speaker event that evening. Then, my phone rang.

“Your son has lice, you need to come get him from school,” said his sweet teacher. Ugh! I could feel my chest tighten and body stiffen as my mind raced to all I had yet to accomplish by 7:30 a.m. the following day.

The next morning, after a late night of helping my husband de-louse our son (and doing preventative treatments onmyself), working late to catch up from losing the afternoon and four hours sleep, I awoke and thought, “There is no way I’m going to be able to physically pull off this ten-hour day and be ‘on’ at this level for this long.”

So, I surrendered. This is not a new concept for me. I’ve surrendered before and like to think I “surrender” all the time (surrender meaning not giving up, but releasing something to a higher power), but if I’m really honest with myself, I find there are some areas of my life I surrender more easily than others. Interestingly, when this blog post came to me, I thought, “Oh I’ll just go pull up all the posts and newsletter articlesI’ve written on surrendering—I talk about this all the time. But I couldn’t find a single one with surrendering in the title.

After a sleepy early morning meditation session with my husband, we heldhands and I asked him to say a prayer with me that I would be able to take my hands off the wheel and surrender this day to the Divine. And by the time I got out of the shower, my perspective had gone from complete stress and overwhelm to seeing what a gift and opportunity this day could be.

Yes,I was exhausted beyond belief and scared about whether or not I would have the stamina to function—let alone be energized--for the closing keynote to 2000 women at the end of the day, but I also felt this unshakable calm and kept hearing a kind reassuring voice whisper, “All is well.”

So I took a lot of deep breaths that day, kept acknowledging and thanking God for being present with me physically, emotionally and mentally and for guiding every thought, word and action, I practiced self-care, conserved my energy, and embraced “good is good enough.”

Guess what happened? Everything flowed and went phenomenally well (so I’m told!).

This morning when I awoke I thought about the wonderful women and men that are participating in the New Way of Being tele-course I’m leading. Together, we’re releasing old habitual ways of being and stepping into new ways of thinking, being and seeing. We began this program by challenging each person to define what a New Way of Being feels …and then looks like …for them.

For me, I articulated early on that a New Way of Being feels like FREEDOM. A “have to” free zone. And this week, I got that what a New Way of Being looks like to me is SURRENDERING.

This past 24-hours taught me that I’m finally ready to open up to experiencing “surrendering” at a whole new level. Wednesday was life-changing and if this is what is possible when I surrender and let go, I’m headed back to the buffet line for another serving.

Interested in a New Way of Being? Read 7 Ways to Embrace a New Way of Being and join me and like-minded men/women for my 4-week New Way of Being Telecourse . Registration is ongoing through Nov. 30^th. Learn more.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
Attend a retreat/event including my Fri., Dec.16 Reflect & Re-Imagine Small Business Owners Retreat
Join the dialogue and receive weekly inspiration on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
Read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
Empower Others: Schedule Renee for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization

Subscribe to The Journey, a weekly blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to creating balance from the inside out.

Photo: Carly Daniel Photography. May we all allow ourselves to surrender and let go at this level. I'm so excited! Two of my brothers are expecting babies next year. I've got babies on the brain and can't wait to welcome these beautiful sweet souls to our family.

Shifting

2011-10-30T16:05:00.001-06:00

Friday I got triggered.

One of my team members told me they wouldn’t be available to help me this week as I prepare for several major events.

I translated this into “I’m not supported in the world."

And I immediately felt a strong tidal wave of emotions sweep through my body.

But then something interesting happened.

Thirty minutes later—after ten minutes of slow, deep, conscious breathing while I was sitting in my car outside my hair salon preparing to go in for a trim--I heard a clear, kind voice say, "You know that’s not true. You are abundantly supported.”

This truth landed internally like a 100 pound anchor, and as I resonated with these words, I felt something inside me “dislodge.” It was like a re-patterning was occurring in the moment—as if my internal blueprint for how I see and respond to life was shifting.

It was quite powerful.

I’m in the middle of facilitating and participating in a tele-course where we’re challenging ourselves weekly to let our old, outdated habits and ways of thinking and being “fall away” (what better time to do this than autumn, especially after this past summer).

This morning I’m feeling deep gratitude for the opportunity to step into a New Way of Being with my class. Because this—releasing, stretching, evolving, coming into the highest expression of who are while in the good company of others—is what Ibelieve this “thing we call life” is all about.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
Attend a retreat/event
Join the dialogue and receive weekly inspiration on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
Read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
Empower Others: Schedule Renee for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization

Subscribe to The Journey, a weekly blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to creating balance from the inside out.

Photo: Me hiking "au natural" in Big Sur last year with my husband. This week, one of my team members shared with me how different I look now than I did 10 years ago (more youthful and vibrant now). It seems when we begin to have shifts and our inner landscape becomes lighter and more alive-- our outer landscape follows suit.

More Harmony, Please

2011-10-23T20:24:00.002-06:00

This pastweek was a doozy.

It seemedeverywhere I turned—clients, friends, school, family, businesses—people were indisequilibrium.

On apersonal note, it makes sense that I would experience some resistance giventhat on top of our busiest month of the year (personally and professionally),I’m stepping into a New Way of Being and guiding others on this journeytoo! Read more. Nothing stirs up the pot like deciding to make a quantumchange in how you live and work.

So for ourfamily this past weekend and moving forward, it’s back to basics. As weprepare for an exciting but very full next three weeks, we are:

making aconscious choice to pause before we say “yes” to more activity and to scaleback as much as possible on extracurriculars so we can create more breathingroom
eatingsimply (yesterday’s lunch of baked potatoes and broccoli was perfect—and loadedwith fiber and serotonin boosters!)
consciouslyspending time in nature (we said no to numerous weekend activities so we couldall participate in a small family camping trip to Krause Springs onSaturday)
making it apoint to create space to just be together as a family even if it’s doing chores side by side (this doesn’t mean it’skumbaya all day: yesterday my son unleashed a tsunami on us after we asked himto clean the bathroom!)
practicing “good is good enough”—and being mindful about giving our attentionto things which matter most rather than things which matter least
over-communicating with one another so we’re aware of what each person is navigating and can be more compassionate with one another
making sure we’re all going to bed early and getting plenty of sleep toboost our immune systems and enhance our moods/energy levels

Given allthat we’re navigating right now (collectively and individually), I thought you mightenjoy hearing from other families around the U.S. on how they enhance harmony andemotional well-being in the everyday.

Below are some of the uneditedresponses we received from the more than 130 families that responded when Isurveyed them for my new book this past summer. (Read more.)

I'd love to hear how you enhance harmony and emotional well-being in your everyday life here.

Q: What enhances your family’s sense of harmony and emotional well-being? (Note: my apologies for the length.There were just so many great responses, I decided to go ahead and list half of them here.)

gettingout in nature together; having down time; deciding nothing needs to get done
familydinners and allowing space for each one of us to say whatever is on our mindwithout judgement.
togetherness.sometimes separateness. music. art. food. laughter. honesty. adventure.
humor:as parents we like to emulate what the kids do and have fun with it; wefamiliarize ourselves with their world; activities, tv shows, songs andinteract in play; this makes the kids happy
spendingtime together just snuggling on the couch, eating dinner together, doing chorestogether
wetalk endlessly about big ideas and philosophy; unstructuredtime spent together … sometimes doing nothing, ahhhhhnocomputer or Internet connection in the home; family dinners and family fun/datenights; open communication; practicing presence with one anothergoingon camping trips together, going to family get-togethers, sharing all the workit takes to care for kids.
Ihave to center myself each and every day or I throw everyone else off; spendingtime listening and meeting the most pressing needs helps too
nightlyfamily worship; weekly family meetings; going to church together and eatingmeals together
doingless; being involved in less activities; making sure that mom and dad get timealone together and apart
beingphysically close to each other, making eye contact, laughing!
everydayrituals: routine expectations, and emphasis on being there for each other inimportant moments; weekendmeals together; sharing our day at bedtime and dinner
spending time together, eating a sit down dinner and discussing the day; we spend a lot of time in nature,learning about the world around us; we strive to maintain peace in our house which makes everyonehappier!
enjoyingshared meals or activities that are more quiet in nature - such as walks orspending time outside. Reading is also a big part of our lives and we sharebooks with our children that represent our values/outlook.
timespent outdoors, hiking, caring for our garden, reading going to museums andgalleries, exploring our great city, making stuff, connecting with friends--these are all things we do to feel connected and at peace; we encourage our children to feel connected with othersby giving time and support to those in need.
familydinners, limited TV watching, daily catch-ups, hugs+kisses in the morn/eve andwhen we say 'hi' + 'bye', attending church + sharing brunch with congregationafterwards, daily check-ins, saying I love you
workingon community projects as a family (park clean up days, build park trails,working at food banks, etc); familygame night at least once a week; eatingdinner as a family and discussing our day; working on home projects as a family
laughter,travel to the beach, activities that everyone enjoys (i.e., backyard cookouts and games); playing together
notscheduling too many activities in one day, keeping our home free of clutter,going to Mass each week, spending time outside together
beingoutdoors in nature; attending church and church related activities; having a(flexible but in place) daily schedule
timespent outside - hiking, swimming, boating, backyard time swinging, blowingbubbles, flying kites
rituals,sticking to them: family night,Saturday with Dad, story time, sacredtime where I play with my daughter being fully present for 30-60 min.
whenwe slow down: our family iscomprised of 4 ADHD highlyfunctioning (read type a) members who tend to move through the day withoutslowing down to really hear each other; we are conscious of this and making a much better effort tocommunicate more effectively and with better emotional control; family therapy has helped tremendously
dailyfamily sharing "highlights" and"lowlights"; doingsomething active on weekends - swimming, hiking, 5-10 minutes (not rushed) at bedtime to talk; being organized so I don't have to say"hurry up!"
as busyas we are, at dinner we have the sweetest ritual in which wehold hands and silently look into each other's eyes. I love looking at myhusband and daughter gazing at each other as much as I love looking into theireyes: it's this beautiful synergistic experience that intensifies our familycycle of love. I am always amazed at how quickly and deeply we all receive fromthese long gazes. No matter what our day has been like, we find just what weneed in those tender moments: relief, joy, forgiveness, a deep sense of beingknown and held. There is something quite profound about looking into eachother's eyes and being together in that place beyond words. The habit of thatritual is especially healing on stressful, rough days. Many a night, my eyestear-up as I reconnect to my heart and the deeper current of Life as I lookinto the eyes of my precious family and as I let them see into me as well.After we look "in" each other, we feast our eyes on our food, thenclose our eyes and go in even deeper to the silence. Someone gives a gentlesqueeze after a while, and we begin to dine, renewed and present to our selvesand each other
nature,communication, meditation, exercise, joy, laughter, love, yummy/healthy meals,travel
longroadtrips w/ uninterrupted windshield drivetime;we have had more sillymoments inside a car that we can count. The long hours together become sweetereach time we hit the road. Also,regular family meals. When we have thecrazy weeks of client dinners and don't have a family meal for at least twonights in a row, we can tell something is off or it's just more difficult forall of us. We need the family time to ground each of us. Lastly, taking in a new experience -- one that is newfor all ofus. We all enjoydiscovering together and watching each of us make our own connections andinsights is always a good way to learn and grow together.
rest.couples counseling. routine and rituals (Saturday MovieNight, etc)
myfamily feels connected when we enjoy a slow dinner together each evening.During that time we share with each other something we are grateful for thatday. It helps us remember all of our blessings that day. I have noticed thatthe girls stop throughout the day to notice the goodness around them - they maysay "Oh, I'm going to share this tonight at our 'grateful time.' " Ithas also helped me and my husband not to talk about work worries at the dinnertable. My daughters feel connected and peaceful when I give them personalblessings each day - I wrap them in an "angel blanket" each nightbefore bed and I give them a "blessing" before they go to school eachday.
meditation.Even if the kids don't want to meditate at that moment, they can hang outaround me and get something out of it, too. Insisting on lots of downtime athome, planning nothing - so what comes out of it is wrestling, group playingwith the cat, laughing at comic books, creative pursuits, all impromptu.
aregular routine, healthy food, regular times for mom and dad separately andtogether to decompress and fill themselves up and verbalizing our appreciationfor one another.
open communication, one on one time and family time involving activities we all enjoy; time without electronics
quietdinners, walks in the park or neighborhood, sharing stories and reflecting onthe day and taking time to greet/hug one another in the morning and when we seeeach other after work, giving each other compliments/praise on a regular basis
fewerthings on the calendar, spending time in nature, laughing, eating mealstogether, really listening to one another and enjoying time together as afamily with other special family and friends.
sharingin a project, eating meals together, doing "home church"by listeningto an inspirational message or sermon together and then discussing it, sittingin nature to meditate, sitting under the full moon, going for walks or hikes innature, camping, watching movies at home together
connection:eating together, doing activities together; regular sleep and mealtimes; not over-scheduling; relativelyclean, usually quiet, and orderly environment-- when possible.
togethertime both w/ immediate and/or with extendedfamily. A certain amount of alone time- pursuing passions. Going to church sometimes.
whenthere is nothing on the agenda; i.e. appointments, engagements, homework, anykind of to-do list - which isn't that often.
havingfun together (bowling, bike ride), slowing down the bedtime routine so there'splenty of time to talk, piling in my bed and reading (each one his or her ownbook but at the same time). Less on the calendar.
timein prayer with my family, anddon't sweat the small stuff (ie. pick your battles); talking at dinner and at bed time, camping, being together in nature
spendingtime together without tv or electronics. Allowing our relationships to includethe full emotional range, so we are open with each other about positive andnegative emotions we experience together. This fosters a sense of resilienceand trust in the strength of our relationships.
beingaway from day to day distractions -- technology, jobs, school, friends. Creating morequiet in our lives.
forus it's not just meals together (usually we eat out because I don't cook that much) but also the space to betogether, yet doing our own thing. We are all free spirits, yet very supportiveof each others independence.
unplugging,doing more physically active things together like swimming, working on the garden, etc.
stayingon a schedule. Having family dinner. Rituals like weekly Friday night movienight or weekend hikes on the greenbelt.
eatingmeals together, family night (watching a family movie with coke floats onFridays), attending church, family prayers/bedtime prayers; spending together doing an activity thatwe love such as skiing or cooking.
whetherit's when we are all dancing silly or holding hands praying before a meal, Icherish the united we stand mentality.
doingthe little things of the day together without rushing (eat, read, walk, work, cuddle, speak,sing, play, goof)
spendingtime in nature together, mom and dad taking time to themselves to run, ridebike, unscheduled time at home
less on our schedule, sitting down for a home cooked meal, especially when thechildren helped prepare it, walks in the evening
havinga routine or rhythmthat everyone can count on; doingactivities that we all enjoy and can participate in, like dancing or yoga.
beingpart of andconnected to a greatercommunity, appreciating my family as part of that
spendingquality, non-rushed time together that isn't 'too planned': things like pizza night, sitting out onthe porch for coffee/wine while the kids play
when weare eachable to have individualtime doing things we enjoy, we are then able to better enjoy time with the ones we love
mom'sfeelings of connection, harmony and peace. When mom feels it, others seem to aswell.
we believe God helps guide us each day and helps to keep us connected with eachother.

Want support for enhancing peace/harmony in your everyday life? Read 7 Ways to Embrace
a New Way of Being and join me and like-minded men/women for my 4-week New Way of
Being Tele-course. Learn more. This is an amazing group; registration is ongoing through
November.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers! I invite you to:
-Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
-Attend a retreat/event
-Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
-Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
-Read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
-Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an
initial complimentary consultation
-Empower Others: Schedule Renee for a private workshop or retreat for your company or
organization

Subscribe to The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal
journey and how to live life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: My husband and 9 year-old son on a leisurely stroll on a farm in rural New Mexico. This
area was near Chaco Canyon, one of the gems from our summer vacation.

A New Way of Being

2011-10-17T18:52:00.004-06:00

(This morning I found this scribbled on the back of a page in my journal. It's from the first week of my summer writing sabbatical. June 22, 2011. You can read more about my summer here.)

The deepest part of me desires to WAKE UP and evolve into a New Way of Being!!

I am done with "Just two more phone calls, ten more emails, if can just ..." I'm done with having my worth tied to my productivity ... to serving ... to success. Done, done, "stick a fork in me" done!

I desire to live EVERY DAY more pleasure-full, play-full and present.

I am a spirit, not a robot. I am a woman, not a manager. I am a creative, sensual amazing soul that wants to live a fully AWAKENED life. All the time, not just when I happen to be inspired to do so.

I release, I let go. I'm ready. Bring it on.

Want to join me? What better way to embrace a New Way of Being than to teach it? Read 7 Ways to Embrace a New Way of Being and join me and like-minded men/women for my 4-week New Way of Being Telecourse for all of us who are done with overwork and overwhelm. I’m so excited about this revolutionary new approach that was born from my summer writing sabbatical and I can’t wait to support you in creating the life you desire from the inside-out! Learn more.

P.S. Have you heard about the I CHOOSE LOVE public service campaign? It's a reminder to ourselves and our brothers and sisters that when we come from love--one of the most powerful yet underutilized forces on the planet--we have the ability to transcend fear and remember what we're really hear to do: give and receive love. Learn more about how you can embrace this message in your daily life through being more mindful, sharing stories, ordering a tshirt (at cost) and more.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
Attend a retreat/event
Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
Read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
Empower Others: Schedule Renee for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization

Subscribe to The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Living from the Inside-Out

2011-10-09T20:21:00.045-06:00

October overwhelm. It’s an old familiar friend. With my natural proclivity to “always think big” (I am a dyed in the wool entrepreneur!), underestimate how much time is needed for tasks and my tendency to take on too much at one time--I can easily find myself juggling more than one should: this week it's a new book deal, two upcoming keynotes, a retreat, a new program launch and several other yummy new endeavors.

However, something is different this time around. Even though there are moments when I feel like I’m swimming in pea soup and my chest and upper back are yelling “Hey Renee, slow down!” there’s more space around how I’m seeing and experiencing what’s before me.

There is a deeper pull to approach this month from the inside-out. A calling to operate from a higher altitude, a new level of maturity or discernment. To come from a New Way of Being (my name for the “wise zone”—a place of space and freedom where I function at my highest/best and can clearly see what matters most).

Yes there’s a lot going on right now, but at the same time my desire to feel good—to feel a sense of well-being, ease and that everything is ok no matter what—is bigger and stronger than my need to control, achieve or do it my way.

And so I call forth self-compassion during this particularly robust time and I practice Living from the Inside Out by:
•releasing the notion that my worthiness is tied to my productivity or ability to create results! (read more)
•practicing “good is good enough” (read more) around music/details for my retreat, how I promote my new programs and how clean my home is (or isn’t!)
•delegating more, asking for/receiving help and being willing for things to be done differently than how I would handle them
•trusting that I don’t have to figure things out all by myself and can relax into the support (seen and unseen) that is always with and around me
•not caring what others think AND being willing to frustrate or anger people when I don’t respond in a way that they want me to (read more)

Stepping back, I realize as I prepare for my new book, upcoming Kripalu retreat, New Way of Being telecouse and the Austin Women’s Conference, that I have created the perfect stew to practice and embody what I most desire to learn (and live): the belief that I can step into a New Way of Being and still be successful . That this space has actually been there all along, waiting for me. And I don’t have to be or do or prove anything to experience this. I deserve to live this way. We all do. It's our birthright.

An Invitation: What better way to embody a New Way of Being than to teach it? Read 7 Ways to Embrace a New Way of Being and join me and like-minded men/women for my 4-week New Way of Being Telecourse for all of us who are done with overwork and overwhelm. I’m so excited about this revolutionary new approach to balanced living and can’t wait to support you in creating the life you desire from the inside-out!

P.S. Have you heard about the I CHOOSE LOVE public service campaign? It's a reminder to ourselves and our brothers and sisters that when we come from love--one of the most powerful yet underutilized forces on the planet--we have the ability to transcend fear and remember what we're really hear to do: give and receive love. Learn more about how you can embrace this message in your daily life through being more mindful, sharing stories, ordering a tshirt (at cost) and more.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event; join me Oct. 14-16 at Kripalu in the amazing cool Berkshire mountains for our Women's Self-Renewal Retreat.
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization

Subscribe to The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: Music in the Moment, a painting by Nancy Ortenstone . I saw this painting while we were vacationing this summer in Taos at Nancy's studio and bought a print. This image captures for me the feeling behind a New Way of Being. It is the first thing I see when I wake up each morning.

Ahhh....A Change Is Needed!

2011-10-03T19:48:00.022-06:00

My husband and I had a challenging time around communication this past week. Of course, I can quickly blame it on his heady, introverted nature (he’s an INTP if you know Myers Briggs speak), but the truth is it takes two to tango.

At the same time we were dealing with our stuff, four friends reached out to me within a 48 hour period—all were navigating big relationship hurdles and some shared they may be looking at separation or divorce. (It was an emotional weekend for many, to say the least.)

It seems many of us are being challenged right now to examine what’s working and what’s not in our key relationships, and if necessary, to course correct.

Hours later following our disconnect, my partner and I had a great conversation around things each of us could do differently to help enhance harmony in our relationship.

And, for the first time ever, rather than internalizing “what’s wrong,” or ingesting self-criticism or blame (my husband’s tendency)—we both simply came to the realization that “Ahhhh … a change is needed,” in how we communicate.

It felt like such a relief to realize we didn’t have to turn this into WWIII. We could simply see this for what it was: a call to action to change the way we do things. And to respond accordingly. Even with a bit of levity!

Sometimes changes may involve tweaking our cruise control setting or adjusting our rear view mirror and other times, it may mean moving from Farm Road 150 to the toll road.

“Ahhh … a change is needed.” It feels good just to say it (and a lot less burdensome than “So how do we fix this?”).

I look forward to getting many more opportunities this fall to respond to various situations with “Ahhh … a change is needed.” Maybe you’d like to test-drive it, too.

An Invitation: this past summer I had some huge ah-has around how I want to live/work moving forward. I came to the realization that even though there are many things I appreciate and enjoy about how I’ve set up my life, I desire even more space, simplicity and freedom. So what better way to embody a New Way of Being than to teach it? Read 7 Ways to Embrace a New Way of Being and join me and like-minded men/women for my 4-week New Way of Being Telecourse for all of us who are done with overwork and overwhelm. I’m so excited about this revolutionary new program and can’t wait to support you in creating the life you desire from the inside-out!

P.S. Have you heard about the I CHOOSE LOVE public service campaign? It's a reminder to ourselves and our brothers and sisters that when we come from love--one of the most powerful yet underutilized forces on the planet--we have the ability to transcend fear and remember what we're really hear to do: give and receive love. Learn more about how you can embrace this message in your daily life through being more mindful, sharing stories, ordering a tshirt (at cost) and more.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event; join me Oct. 14-16 at Kripalu in the amazing cool Berkshire mountains for our Women's Self-Renewal Retreat.
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization

Subscribe to The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: I’m currently taking qi gong (an ancient practice designed to balance qi or life energy) from Master Li at AOMA I love Master Li’s prompts to expand into a “feel good” state while doing qi gong. He says the emotional state is one of the most important elements of the practice. “Ahhh … a change is needed,” I now say with a smile. I think Master Li would approve.

Choosing Love Over Fear

2011-09-21T15:55:00.036-06:00

There are only ever two choices: love or fear. Which path will you take?

My writing sabbatical this past July/August was incredible. Incredibly intense that is. I told a friend the other day it was like 30 years of therapy in two months. I went far and deep and visited places I've never been before!

At the end the summer, I spent a divine day and night alone at a beautiful cabin, located on 20 acres about 20 minutes from downtown Austin (the cabin was specially created for personal retreats).

The message I kept hearing on my solo date (on the heels of a conversation with my publisher about how fearful many Americans are right now due to the election, economy, and natural disasters) was the reminder that we always have a choice in how we interact with one another and see the world.

We can come from fear (where we constrict, contract, shut down and cut ourselves off from others) or we can come from love (where we expand, open, connect and trust). Our daily interactions are a reflection of where we choose to hang out and live: the house of fear or the house of love.

So this fall we're introducing an I CHOOSE LOVE public service campaign as a reminder to ourselves and our brothers and sisters that when we come from love--one of the most powerful yet underutilized forces on the planet--we have the ability to transcend fear and remember what we're really hear to do: give and receive love.

Learn more about how you can embrace this message in your daily life through being more mindful, sharing stories, ordering a tshirt (at cost) and more.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event; join me Oct. 14-16 at Kripalu in the amazing cool Berkshire mountains for our Women's Self-Renewal Retreat.
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Logo design: www.highwirecreative.com and www.hidesigngraphics.com

Practice

2011-09-13T15:28:00.028-06:00

This morning my nine year-old was in total disequilibrium.

I don’t know if it was the 9/11 documentary we let him watch, the full moon or another growth spurt, but it didn’t feel good and I didn’t want any of us to leave for the day on a sour note. So right before our family walked out the door for the day--at my request--we circled up, dropped to the living room floor, did a check in with Jonah on what’s going on, listened from the heart, set individual intentions for our day and gave each other hugs before we walked out into the world. It’s amazing what taking a bit of time to be present with another will do!

I’m the in middle of taking some quantum leaps forward around how I work/run my business and manage my life. I’m very excited about stepping into this new way of being (in fact I’m launching a whole program with this same title!) and experiencing more freedom and space in my life. But this morning reminded me that even though I’ve been practicing and teaching “life balance essentials” for 10 years, (ex: managing your energy/saying no, slowing down/being more present, embracing self-care and asking for/receiving help) I still have to remind myself to tap into these tools daily.

Practice is defined as “to perform repeatedly so as to become proficient.”

I got the chance to attend a workshop on the Art of Mindfulness with Buddhist Priest and author Karen Maezen Miller in Houston on Saturday. Maezen (her Buddhist name) lovingly and passionately encouraged us to be particularly mindful of where/how we focus our attention when we’re interacting in our most intimate relationships. And that this truly requires a certain level of practice; she recommended meditation as the key to getting there—I second this.

Yesterday morning I awoke to the sounds of my son playing the piano. He’s been taking lessons since he was 6 (thank you Anna Larson) but he just hit his stride—both hands, flowing, enjoyable to listen to, connected to the music, even practicing without being asked. As I lay in my bed (slightly irritated that is was 6:35 a.m. but enjoying the beautiful sounds coming from downstairs), I had the ah-hah that we’re all on the same path. His progress came from repeated practice. It seems like his leap happened overnight, but it didn’t. It came from playing simple songs and scales over and over day after day.

I’m feeling gratitude for the message this morning that you have to feed the kids before you can send them to college (or in my case, keep returning to the “life balance essentials” before I move to the next stage)and appreciating the reminder that a “rewiring” or quantum shift in how we do things is usually preceded by lots and lots of practice, baby steps and sometimes years of playing Row, Row, Row Your Boat until one day, you can play the theme from Harry Potter.

Thank you Jonah, I needed that.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event; join me Oct. 14-16 at Kripalu in the amazing cool Berkshire mountains for our Women's Self-Renewal Retreat.
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, and read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration
The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Video: Jonah, 9, playing Flying Fingers by Carolyn Setliff. One of his favs.

Breathe

2011-09-01T12:08:00.025-06:00

I heard a movement teacher say the other day that every time we take a deep breath, our physiology and emotional makeup is completely altered. So in other words, remembering to breathe, can be life changing!

I returned back to the office this week after being out for most of the summer on a writing sabbatical/traveling (it was very fruitful and insightful; more to come on my ah-has and my New Way of Being telecourse program that was birthed from my summer away unplugged to work on my new book).

My intention for the fall is FREEDOM (read more) and as I eased into my work space on Monday and sat down to my new white computer (yay—it makes me feel oh-so-free!) a glass of sparkling water and some good Mozart, I kept the deep inhales and exhales coming at a steady pace.

And, although things got a bit wobbly at times, I surfed the wave successfully (the phrase we like to use in our office that means maintaining a big picture view, focusing only on what is most critical and walking away from things that are not true priorities).

I’ll never forget in 1996, returning to my corporate cubicle and international PR job after a two-week trip to Europe and Dachau (read more). Even though I was returning to a very stressful job, for days I experienced this healthy detachment to my everyday tasks balanced with a deeper sense for what was truly meaningful. What mattered most.

I’ve got that same feeling in my bones now. And yes—thousands more emails, requests, calls and contracts await—but maybe I’ll only respond to half of them … or less. Who knows?

My desire for more space and freedom at work is overriding everything else right now. So, just breathing and trusting that I’ll be guided to where my energy is most needed in the coming months.

Am keeping my favorite quote by Goethe, “Things which matter least should be never be at the mercy of things which matter most,” close by.

Note: Each quarter I take a personal/business planning one-day retreat to help me determine how best to use my energy/time to support my businesses in the coming 3-6 months. If you're self-employed and need a guided, structured opportunity to listen deeply to your inner wisdom, receive high level, strategic coaching support and to be reminded of why you do what you do this fall, consider joining me on Sept. 16 at Casa de Artistas in Austin. I love these visioning retreats and always leave with clear, grounded direction.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event; join me Oct. 14-16 at Kripalu in the amazing cool Berkshire mountains for our Women's Self-Renewal Retreat.
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, join us for our Sept. 8th class on Going with the Flow While Still Getting Things Done! and read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Listening

2011-08-21T20:07:00.028-06:00

We just finished a wonderful dinner of New Mexican red chile roasted veggie enchiladas. We were joined by some dear neighbors and before everyone headed home we gathered our four sweet children ages five to nine for a school year blessing (they all start tomorrow).

We asked the kids to close their eyes and reflect on what kind of school year they wanted to have-- what their theme would be for the next nine months. They giggled, paused and then shared (their words): blissfulness, flowingness and fun, creativity, happy sunshine and bouncy castle. Then they each got to pick a special stone or natural treasure from the bowl on our counter to take home as a reminder of their intention.

I think the reason I love setting intentions is they don’t require an action or a goal. They’re more about how I intend to be.

My intention for the fall is FREEDOM.

And after attending a wonderful creative intent workshop on Saturday, I got the confirmation again that this is not going to come from changing my schedule, moving into a new work space or getting a personal assistant. For me, freedom is an inside out job. (Read more.)

Lately, everyone I talk to seems to share their desire for something along this same line. They want a new way of being. Not just a tweak to their current system for how they manager their lives/careers/relationships, but an overhaul, a paradigm shift, a totally new way to approach how they experience daily life.

My husband says I’m hearing this from so many because I hang out with people in the human potential field, but I disagree. I think there is a growing number of us who are done with being overworked, overscheduled and overly busy. We have a strong hunger to experience a life that’s more spacious and simple.

This week, I’m leaving to take a spiritual retreat. I’ve spent a lot of time creating this summer and I’m clear that now it’s time to stop everything and just listen … quietly and deeply.

I believe my external landscape and world is a reflection of my inner landscape. And, right now, it’s in need of some weeding, pruning, tilling and watering. Essential work to clearing away internal clutter and creating the space to hear what most needs to be heard.

And possibly to receive guidance around what experiencing more freedom might look like in my business and life.

I’ll let you know how the week goes when I return to the office on August 29th. Thanks for sending me good thoughts.

P.S. I talk a lot about Living Inside Out. If you’re curious what this means, you might be interested in this short video Brianna, our communications assistant, made around what this message and movement. And, if this calling resonates with you, join our dialogue on the Live Inside Out Community.

Note: Each quarter I take a personal/business planning retreat to help me determine how best to use my energy/time to support my businesses in the coming 3-6 months. If you're self-employed and need a guided, structured opportunity to listen deeply to your inner wisdom, receive high level, strategic coaching support and to be reminded of why you do what you do this fall, consider joining me on Sept. 16 at Casa de Artistas in Austin. I love these visioning retreats and always leave with clear, grounded direction.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event; join me Oct. 14-16 at Kripalu in the amazing cool Berkshire mountains for our Women's Self-Renewal Retreat.
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, join us for our Sept. 8th class on Going with the Flow While Still Getting Things Done! and read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: From our recent family vacation to New Mexico. Full moon at Chaco Canyon National Historic Park. Some believe this ancient, mysical site built by the Anasazi people was a place of spiritual pilgrimage for many. A place people would gather to be still ... and listen.

Self-Compassion

2011-08-01T14:35:00.024-06:00

Last week I had a day where I felt like I was swimming through steel cut oatmeal (as my west Texas therapist friend Donna likes to say).

I was judgmental and finding fault with every person, group, situation, scenario I was bumping up against.

And when I meditated, the thoughts I usually watch dance by like twigs rolling down a river, were as thick as cement running through my veins.

But my saving grace was I knew it. There was a level of discernment happening thanks largely to a presence coach I began working with almost 17 years ago that introduced me to the principles author/therapist Richard Carlson taught around the connection between thought and mood.

Even though I couldn’t easily pull myself out of this funk, I knew I was responsible for feeling yucky. I was the originator of these negative thoughts. These pesky, multiplying “tribbles” (remember these on Star Trek?) were having a field day at my expense. And yes, the quickest way to change my mood was to change my thinking, but that morning, this task looked as daunting as climbing Mount Everest.

So I acknowledged where I was. Reached out and asked for some support. Kept my expectations low around my work output. Tried to laugh at myself (“You’ve got to be kidding ….you think I’m going to believe THAT?!). Drank a tall glass of self-compassion and sat with the reminder that this too shall pass.

And it did. Friday came and after I had the opportunity to teach a workshop for an amazing, inspiring group of professionals, I was reminded of who I really was. And that I am not my negative thoughts.

And what I truly desire is that I’ll remember to be grateful when my mood is high and graceful when it’s low.

Because one thing I’m guaranteed of for the rest of this life is that the thoughts will keep coming. And some days when I’m lucky, I’ll get to watch them float by on the river, waving from the banks. While others, I’ll find myself jumping on their tenuous raft and floating down the murky stream right along with them, rats and all!

P.S. Each quarter I take a personal/business planning retreat to help me determine how best to use my energy/time to support my businesses in the coming 3-6 months. If you're self-employed and needing focus, an energy boost, high level, strategic coaching support and to be reminded of why you do what you do this fall, consider joining me on Sept. 16 at Casa de Artistas in Austin. I love these visioning retreats and always leave with clear, grounded direction.

Note: I'm out on a writing sabbatical this summer and we're surveying the Emotional and Spiritual Health of Families for my new writing project. If you have 5 minutes to tell me about your family culture, I’d love to get your input (and feel free to share with friends/lists): http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/RXZ88GR

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event; join me Oct. 14-16 at Kripalu in the amazing cool Berkshire mountains for our Women's Self-Renewal Retreat.
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, join us for our Sept. 8th class on Going with the Flow While Still Getting Things Done! and read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: Roses from my sister's blessingway. They say the rose is symbolic of compassion for self and others. I'll have another round.

Waiting

2011-07-25T11:34:00.029-06:00

In 1999 I was so ready for a career change I thought I would implode if my new path didn’t reveal itself soon!

I was taking many steps to support the career exploration process--doing informational interviews, journaling and asking the hard questions, conducting research, getting support, thinking big, staying true to my passion and saying no to a lot of opportunities that weren’t a true fit---but I had yet to land on a new path that felt so solid and right I was ready to ditch my full-time job as an established department head leading a robust marketing communications division. (Check out my Friday workshop if you’re considering or are in the midst of a career change.)

So being the type A, driven, “make it happen” kind of person I was then, I booked a vacation with my fiance to Huatulco, Mexico and told my new career path it had exactly 10 days to arrive. When I returned from our vacation getaway, I wanted the answer delivered in a nice neat package to my door (preferably via FedEx). I was tired of waiting and being in limbo. So as was my style then, I planned to force this to happen by giving the Universe a deadline!

Looking back at that time, I’m able to laugh now (I did end up making a big change in 2000—the year I launched Career Strategists, but this clarity came to me months later, after I was able to relinquish “paralysis by analysis” and finally let go of the fear that was keeping me from seeing what had been in front of me all along).

This teaching came to me in yoga this morning when I set my intention for the day and heard clearly, “Relax … and wait.”

While my larger life and career path feels clear, I’m completely up in the air around specifics like my new book release date, when to roll out some new revolutionary programs/events I’m creating, what my fall is going to look like work/schedule/location-wise, how much to travel this fall, etc.

One thing I’ve learned since launching my first business almost 12 years ago, is how essential is to take action that is deeply guided, as opposed to just taking action for action’s sake. It’s important to me to use my precious time and energy in the most effective way possible. I like to enjoy work, to find pleasure in what I do, to have fun, to feel synchronized inside and out, to flow with things, to work with people I love—and of course, to get things done.

The other day, I had tea with a dear friend and mentor. She listened to me talk about my strong desire to “Do it different” this fall, to work with more spaciousness and ease than ever before (read more) and she applauded my willingness to surrender and wait to see what this might look like. She suggested I consider the mantra, “Let me be willing to let go of what I think the world needs from me …” that really resonates with my desire to take my hands off the wheel and step into more freedom this fall (click here to receive our August newsletter on What Are You Ready to Be Free From?).

So for now, I wait. I wait for the answers and guidance from my wise self on how and when to do what is mine to do. And regardless of when the answers come, I’m committed to following the wisdom that emerges. Even if it doesn’t look like what I thought it would.

P.S. Each quarter I take a personal/business planning retreat where I engage in my favorite exercises focused on helping me determine how best to use my energy/time to support my businesses in the coming 3-6 months. I just started opening these up to friends/colleagues. If you’re a small business owner and this resonates with you, consider joining me on Sept. 16. I love these visioning retreats and always leave with clear, grounded direction.

Note: I'm out on a writing sabbatical this summer and we're surveying the Emotional and Spiritual Health of Families for my new writing project. If you have 5 minutes to tell me about your family culture, I’d love to get your input (and feel free to share with friends/lists): http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/RXZ88GR

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event or workshop, including our July 29th Career Strategy Workshop: Find a Fit, Create a Plan, Love Your Work in Austin
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, join us for our Sept. 8th class on Going with the Flow While Still Getting Things Done! and read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: The way-too-dry Pedernales River bed. Along with thousands of fellow Texans we wait for rain to come and this drought to end.

Allowing

2011-07-12T20:06:00.015-06:00

Last March my family took a trip to Big Bend National Park. In the middle of our family vacation, after a long day of hiking in the canyon and swimming in the river, we stopped at a quiet, still campground on the banks of the Rio Grande. As soon as we pulled in to park, I felt a strong, invisible nudge to grab some paper and a pen and prepare to write.

My husband and son set out a blanket under gorgeous fifty-foot tall cottonwood trees and I immediately plopped down on my belly to write. In about ten minutes, I had jotted down what ended up being the outline for the book I’m working on now which will come in next spring.

I hadn’t asked for this, nor was I contemplating these themes, they just tapped me on the shoulder, asked me to listen and they flowed right through me.

It was as if these messages were seeking a vehicle or way to be heard (interestingly I already had a book in the works with a different focus which I reluctantly abandoned after being moved so deeply and clearly to follow the new path before me).

I’m a big fan of creative expression. Whether it’s painting, writing, dancing or creating a new business, I believe it’s our job to get out of our own way and let what wants to come through us, be born. No matter what the outcome is or who sees or experiences it.

My husband and I watched the movie Country Strong with Gwyneth Paltrow the other night (rare for us to find something we’re both willing to watch). A character named Beau really stuck out. He was a musician and singer/songwriter that was passionate about creating music and singing—not for the fame, crowds or accolades-- but because he loved it and he was committed to showing up and allowing this inspiration to come through him. And, because he stayed connected to his essence, he inspired others around him to want to do the same.

It can feel like a bit of push and pull when you’re trying to balance creative expression with writing a book that has a clear timeline. But my allegiance and my heart belong to the creative process—to honoring what wants to come through, regardless of the product or ultimate outcome.

Hard? You bet. Particuarly over the past two weeks, when I had very limited time to write due to my son’s part-time day camp schedule, a big AC and car repair to handle, constant requests to respond to and relatives coming in to town. But I’m anchoring back to that commitment today. To receive and allow what wants to be heard…..through me …at this time …in a way only I can express it. Because I can’t imagine doing it any other way.

When I launched my first business Career Strategists 12 years ago, I found myself sitting in my newly furnished, freshly feng-shuied office in central Austin, booking appointments for new clients, feeling a swirl of anxiety in my belly and thinking “Am I crazy?! What the bleep did I just do?”

I remember calling my self-employed brother Kert for some support that first week of business and he emailed me this piece by dancer Martha Graham. He knew how huge it was for me to have taken this leap, turned down lucrative corporate jobs and followed my heart and transition full-time into the field of serving others through the field of professional coaching. The poem really moved me. And as I breathed deep and reminded myself that I have always taken the pass less traveled, I knew that I had to honor what had and was coming through me …what was ready to be heard. And so I did and I can’t imagine any other life.

by Martha Graham
"There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique.

And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and it will be lost. The world will not have it.

It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how valuable nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open.

You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep yourself open and aware to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open. ...

No artist is pleased. [There is] no satisfaction whatever at any time. There is only a queer divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others."

P.S. I recently reconnected with a friend who took a similar leap, leaving a high profile job in publishing to follow her heart and journey into the big unknown. Check out Marianne’s wonderful blog Gap Year Girl Goes to Europe.

Note: I'm out on a writing sabbatical this summer and we're surveying the Emotional and Spiritual Health of Families for my new writing project. If you have 5 minutes to tell me about your family culture, I’d love to get your input (and feel free to share with friends/lists): http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/RXZ88GR

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event or workshop, including our July 29th Career Strategy Workshop: Find a Fit, Create a Plan, Love Your Work in Austin
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, join us for our Aug. 25 class on Going with the Flow While Still Getting Things Done! and read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: The ever inspiring skies in Big Bend National Park. Renee Trudeau

I Want To Be Free From ...

2011-07-04T11:32:00.024-06:00

Last night we gathered with a small group of friends for a Freedom Fest.

No fireworks, hot dogs or Tchaikovsky.

Instead, we enjoyed a lively international potluck (each person brought a dish from a favorite trip they’ve taken) and we asked our guests to bring one thing they wanted to be “free from” this summer: a habit, a worry, a situation, a concern, etc.

Curious who the most popular unwanted house guests were? Anxiety and worry, debt, overwhelm, fear about the future, taking on other people’s “stuff,” resistance to self-care, obligation, and pain and suffering were just a few that gathered around our table.

Originally, when I sat with the question, “What do I want to be free from?” what first came to mind, was email (like many, I’m trying to tame the email dragon).

But as I peeled away the layers of the onion and went even deeper, I realized that all of my busy-ness is caused by the need to produce or create.

We all have this drive and there are positive and negative aspects to this ingrained behavior, but some of us are in “over-drive” when it comes to creating and bringing things to fruition (even if it’s for a good cause, for family, in the name of service/healing/world peace or to create community and foster connection). There are many noble reasons to get busy, but even so--sometimes it all becomes too much.

During the soiree, we passed around a basket of freedom questions: What would happen if I was free from ____________? When was a time I felt most free? What does being free mean to me? What would feeling free at work (or in my marriage) look like? and heard some fascinating perspectives around the theme of “breaking free.”

Before we all said goodnight, we wrote down all the things we wanted to be free from and burned these outside in a clay pot as a symbolic release.

All morning long, I’ve been thinking about the theme of “freedom” and keep coming back to the realization that what we all want most is inner freedom. Freedom from our stressful thinking. From our own reoccurring negative thoughts. We want more interior space. We’re tired of living in a shanty with our own fears and insecurities. We want to live in a mansion---a wide open space where we roam free, react less and respond more. And can breathe. Deep, long, spacious breaths.

Interior freedom. Ahhhhh. Yes, I want to experience more of that for sure.

And, right now, the only way I know how to taste this is to meditate each day—-no matter what.

Dropping into stillness, staying with my breath. Surrendering to the present moment. Because even when my 20 minute sit feels like watching a race car circle madly around a track, I still finish feeling better than when I started. And more and more often, my interior space feels more like somewhere I’d want to actually hang out--somewhere I’d like to live.

At the last minute, we found someone to watch our son this morning and my husband was able to join me for a 9:00 a.m. yoga class. At the end of savasana, the thought appeared in my head, "What am I already free from that I'm not seeing?"

I don't think this freedom theme is ready to depart. I'll be sitting with this new question this week.

Namaste.

P.S. I'm out on a writing sabbatical this summer and we're surveying the Emotional and Spiritual Health of Families for my new writing project. If you have 5 minutes to tell me about your family culture, I’d love to get your input (and feel free to share with friends/lists): http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/RXZ88GR

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event or workshop, including our July 29th Career Strategy Workshop: Find a Fit, Create a Plan, Love Your Work in Austin
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, join us for our Aug. 25 class on Going with the Flow While Still Getting Things Done! and read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: This sweet guy was swimming in a creek on the Barton Creek greenbelt. My friend, son and I loved watching him dive in the water, enjoying the wide open space.

Soulpod

2011-06-29T18:42:00.018-06:00

(I'm out on a writing sabbatical through the summer working on a new project. During this time I'm only posting sporadically, when I'm moved to do so.)

Here we are. Again. Together. Sharing lentil soup. Legs tangled, snuggling under the warm blankets. Negotiating piano practice and chores. Telling stories from our day. Moving from asleep to awake and awake to asleep. Navigating being human.

When I stop, I see your curious eyes and your beautiful spirit. You remind me of who I want to be in the world … who I really am.

We have the gift of now. It’s a large, beautiful moment. It can expand into the skies and go on forever.

We don’t need to go to the mountains or the beach, plan an adventure, schedule an exciting evening out, wait for a birthday or create a moment to experience one another. This is it.

Screw calendars, to do lists, dirty dishes, overgrown grass and dark, busy inboxes.

We surrender to the moment, hold hands, jump in and swim through the cool, deep waters together …feeling our oneness and the unexplainable mystery of how and why we’re together. Without words, we honor the sacredness of this union.

This connection feels ancient … new … difficult … and easy. The hardest thing in the world and the most delicious. Above all, it’s unique and it’s ours.

When we stop everything. Every. Single. Thing. We find delicious comfort and respite in our three beautiful, interconnected hearts.

We feel the fleeting sweetness of being in each other’s presence. We relax, we remember. We breathe out the entire world.

And we know, this, this, is all we need. This is all there is.

P.S. I’m Surveying the Emotional and Spiritual Health of Families for my new writing project. If you have 5 minutes to tell me about your family culture, I’d love to get your input (and feel free to share with friends/lists): http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/RXZ88GR

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event or workshop, including our July 29th Career Strategy Workshop: Find a Fit, Create a Plan, Love Your Work in Austin
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, join us for our Aug. 25 class on Going with the Flow While Still Getting Things Done! and read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: Barton Springs. June 28, 2011. 4:30 p.m.

Unplugged

2011-06-22T14:30:00.028-06:00

Are you really living your life ... or are you watching your life being lived?

Last night my husband told me he “likes me better the way I am right now.”

I’m at the beginning of an 8-week writing/creativity sabbatical and the ah-has are coming faster than I can catch them.

I’m really getting that in order to be the fully awakened, conscious parent and partner I want to be, I need to slow down, do less and let go even more than I can imagine (and to my credit, I already do quite a bit of this). I just don’t know what that looks like. Yet. (Here’s my recent post on A Different Way.)

I know I shouldn’t be surprised by all the gifts and revelations that have come from being unplugged (basically off email/social media except for the rare occasion—thanks to an amazing support team), but I am.

Since unplugging, I’ve observed:

-physically my body is so much more relaxed, my shoulders feel fluid and open; my heart rate is slower, I don’t feel that constant adrenaline surge
-my thinking has slowed down …there are more pauses, more space, I’m more reflective and more observant
-I’m more present and less reactive in my relationships (especially with my 9 year old and my husband)
-I’m more creative and more willing to try new things (I feel my perspective on life/work/family is more 360 than the 180 view I usually experience)
-I can sense I’m more tuned into nuances, the shades of grey in conversation and interactions
-it’s much easier to see what matters most (I still have a tall stack of “action items” sitting on my desk from May—interestingly, they seem a lot less urgent now)
-I’m more connected to my rhythms, my environment, nature, my home—things seem more colorful, more vibrant
-my tolerance for everyday stress, pushing and rushing has gone way down (and it was already pretty low)
-I’m beginning to question some of my old habitual behaviors that still re-surface (such as tying my sense of “worth” to my ability to be productive, serve others and experience success)

I’ve officially been “unplugged” for about two weeks now and plan to remain offline through the summer.

Yesterday, after taking a yummy salsa class at Esquina Tango, I headed to Blue Dahlia, a wonderful European bistro, to write.

Things weren't flowing, in fact there were at a dead standstill. I felt like a clunky 14-month old learning to walk--horizontal a lot more than I was vertical.

I grappled with this for a few minutes (feeling my precious summer writing window melting away and upcoming publishing deadlines reaching out to inquire, “So, how are things going?”) and then breathed out, ordered a delicious salad and decided to stop pushing. Instead, I got a massage, took a rest, cooked a wonderful summer vegetable dinner for my family, picked up some books to support my research/new writing project, called some friends for support and let go.

And today, my writing flowed like a stream.

Baby steps Renee, baby steps.

P.S. I’m Surveying the Emotional and Spiritual Health of Families for my new writing project. If you have 5 minutes to tell me about your family culture, I’d love to get your input (and feel free to share with friends/lists): http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/RXZ88GR

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event or workshop, including our July 29th Career Strategy Workshop: Find a Fit, Create a Plan, Love Your Work in Austin
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, join us for our Aug. 25 class on Going with the Flow While Still Getting Things Done! and read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: treehugger.com: horse and buggy. The ultimate in low-tech.

A Different Way

2011-06-14T19:13:00.021-06:00

In fall 2008 I was nuts.

Launching my first book, coordinating our global Personal Renewal Group program and running two coaching/consulting businesses was eating my lunch.

I felt like I was in the middle of a tug of war (with each of my businesses at opposite ends), and, it was a no-win scenario.

Every day in my meditation/prayer time, I would ask, “Help me. I desire to see this in a new light. I desire to work in a new way.” And, finally—after a lot of inner work—I did have a breakthrough, a release, and I breathed and all was well again. Like most big shifts, it came from “how I chose to see the situation,” rather than an actual change in the situation itself!

Well, round two. I’m back again. And, while I’m really content with most aspects of my life and many would say I’ve done a decent, maybe even good job of balancing my work demands and family/personal needs, this period of unplugging* has shown me in a few short days that things need to change: I desire an even slower, simpler life and work pace. And, I desire to spend even less time online.

I just wrote about the concept of going with the flow in my recent newsletter (read more). And while I believe and live this principle, I’m realizing that there are degrees of going with the flow ... there’s going for a Sunday drive with the windows rolled down, your hair blowing in the wind and an open mind about where the road may take you ... and then, there is taking your hands off the wheel.

Trusting, releasing and surrendering at such a high level (to God or the Universe), that going with the flow actually begins to look like not driving at all!

Does this sound crazy? Am I making any sense?

Years ago I was working with some brilliant consultants/friends on a product launch.

They had lined up some important meetings in New York with three key decision makers and felt strongly we needed to head to the east coast to meet them right away. My gut was screaming (literally—I was throwing up in the bathroom) that the timing was not right, we were pushing too hard and we needed to wait. But I wanted to honor their expertise, and after three cancelled and flights due to a snowstorm we finally arrived in the big apple.

Taking to the receptionist in a big, sterile office building downtown the following day, we were informed that Janet, our 1:00 had just left to go home with a stomach virus (and no, they didn’t care that we had flown there to meet her from Austin).

Our next meeting with the head of a powerful media group went well—but we found out shortly after our return home, that her father passed away the day after we left and she would be leaving her company for an extended sabbatical. And while these meetings weren’t fruitful, I am still grateful today for this experience and the huge reminder to always, always listen to my inner knowing, and to pay close attention when things are not flowing.

We teach what we need to learn. And coming into balance has been a life-long struggle for me. It’s also something I’m really dedicated to. (Read Is Ms. Balance Out of Balance?)

I remember a therapist asking me in my twenties as I sat on her flowered, aging couch, “Your emotional well-being is of paramount importance; there’s nothing that matters more. What decisions are you willing to make to preserve this?”

I think she’d be happy to see me now. And to witness my willingness to do anything and everything to not only maintain, but to enhance and evolve my sense of peace and well-being, both inside and out.

So back to the meditation cushion for me. And while I don’t have a clue as to what this new way of working and living will look like in the fall, I know my desire for more ease and flow is strong (overwhelmingly so). And I trust—like always—the answer will come. In its own good time.

*From June 6-July 28, I am officially unplugged and out of the office to work on a new writing project. I’ll still be blogging, but only every two weeks. But hop on over to Live Inside Out for daily dialogue on how to live more intentionally.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event or workshop, including our July 29th Career Strategy Workshop: Find a Fit, Create a Plan, Love Your Work in Austin
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, join us for our Aug. 25 class on Going with the Flow While Still Getting Things Done! and read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: Me in my favorite hammock chair. I'm writing an outline for a new project and enjoying a banana-coconut smoothie while listening to the morning doves and drinking in the thousand shades of green in our backyard. I could get used to starting my day like this!

Is Ms. Balance Out of Balance?

2011-06-02T09:44:00.042-06:00

My back and shoulders hurt from too much computer time. I’m not sleeping great (too many late nights online). My mind is too busy. I’m more reactive. And, I’m not as present as I’d like to be with my family and friends.

“When are you going to slow down?” my sweet body asked this morning. “Soon, very soon,” I respond.

I ran into one of the moms from my son’s school at Whole Foods yesterday. We caught up for a moment and after I shared how much I’ve been in overwork during the last two weeks, she smirked and said, “It sounds like Ms. Balance is out of balance.” Years ago this comment would have triggered me and I would have felt the need to justify my current schedule. But this time, I let it run off my back, smiled and moved on to the cereal aisle.

My definition for life balance--having enough time, energy and resources for those things that are most important to you—flooded back to me (read Balance is Bunk?! ).

In a flash, I realized that most people still see life balance as this state of perfect equilibrium in all areas of life (unattainable and unreaslistic!), rather than an ebb and flow of how and where we direct our energy based on our current life priorities.

Yes! I am working way more than I want to right now---getting online early in the morning and staying up late every night to complete a big video project, knocking out seemingly endless deadlines, wrapping up spring outreach projects with my team, participating in back-to-back meetings and conference calls, navigating new contracts for speaking and publishing, booking/negotiating workshop engagements for this fall and spring, writing newsletters and articles, handling interviews, guiding staff on web site updates and training new team members---but it’s for a very good reason.

I’ve chosen to enter into this temporary state of overwork in order to give myself the space I need to work on a new creative endeavor during June and July: a writing project and focus that is very dear to my heart. And in order to fully unplug and enter into the “cave of creation” –I needed to devote some extra energy to my two businesses right now.

At this life and career stage, one of the things that matters most to me is honoring creative expression … giving myself the space, time and support to completely unplug, free fall, dive deep and bring forth what’s yearning to be birthed (read my post on Ripe).

And, honoring my own voice--which like an echo in a canyon is becoming louder and more still at the same time--is a big part of this.

So fingers crossed. Two more days of wrap-up and then I’ll be transitioning into my writing sabbatical (read more on my focus in How Bad Do You Want to Feel Good?).

As my son and I sit outside and watch the birds and enjoy our soy yogurt parfaits from Whole Foods this morning, I also give thanks to my mom friend for the reminder that sometimes in order to experience more harmony and balance in the larger sense, we have to encounter some disequilibrium along the way.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event or workshop
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, join us for our Aug. 25 class on Going with the Flow While Still Getting Things Done! and read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: Me getting my groove on with the wonderful women at our April Kripalu Self-Renewal Retreat. I love dance as a metaphor for coming into balance: attuning, responding, shifting, re-prioritizing and harmonizing our inner/outer state. When I want to feel more balanced, I often put on music and just start to move!

Aware ... ness

2011-05-24T11:59:00.025-06:00

It's 7:00 a.m. I’m sitting at my computer replying to some timely emails before I finish helping my son find his shoes and water bottle and get out the door for school.

He walks into my upstairs office and sits down in the office chair opposite mine and begins to twirl in circles like a mad man, while telling me about a really cool skateboard trick he saw Connor, his 12-year old idol perform last night on our sidewalk.

When this happens—-which is quite often--I usually try and stop for a minute and explain that I can’t give him my full attention until I finish this task, but I'd love to meet him downstairs shortly or could he save the story for dinner time?

Sometimes I do this in gentle tones. Sometimes there’s a sharpness to my voice I wish wasn’t there.

But this morning, I stopped, looked up (I love his earnestness and passion), pushed my laptop aside and really saw him. For a moment, I jumped into his world, imagining how he must have felt watching Connor—wishing his small nine-year old string bean body could do what this testerone-flooded big boy’s could. I could feel how badly he wanted me to experience his excitement at witnessing this force of nature. And for a moment, a veil was lifted, and I did.

And when he left for school with his dad this morning and came to me for a goodbye hug and kiss, I held him tighter than normal and looked intently into his eyes whispering silently, “I see you.”

This five minutes of enlightenment reminded me of Betty Sue Flowers and her son, when she shared at a women’s conference years ago, that to really understand and connect with someone you have to have a desire to move into their world, to occupy their space. Not outside-in, but from the inside-out.

I’m carrying forward this moment into my week with the intention of having “heightened awareness” in how I approach my work, my team, clients, my family, friends and my environment.

I think a lot about being more present and how I can cultivate this quality in my everyday experience (listen here to the class Carrie Contey, PhD and I just led on this theme).

But, I’m realizing there are degrees of “presence.” And sometimes when I think I’m really listening to my son or husband or loved ones. I’m not. At least not like I did this morning with my little guy.

Before my husband and third-grader zipped off to school in our dirty VW, my son rolled down the window and I called out to him from the porch, “Maybe I could get a skateboard and we could try some of those tricks together?” He looked at me funny, “Mom, that would be embarrassing.” And then after a short pause, he added quietly but with hope .. “Would you really do that?” Yes, Jonah, I would.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event or workshop
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, join us for our Aug. 25 class on Going with the Flow While Still Getting Things Done! and read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photos: After a heavy rain, our yard was filled with these critters. When my son brought in eight of them to adorn our bathroom sink and compete in a snail race, I was mortified ... and then delighted. They're actually very cool.

Oh Yeah...That's the Life I Desire!

2011-05-10T18:03:00.021-06:00

Today I felt restless and unsettled. I found myself fixating on things I don’t normally worry about. Throughout the day, I felt like I was being pulled away from my center … from that which matters most.

I realize this is part of being human (even though it's said we’re spiritual beings having a human experience and not the other way around) and today my humanity was ever-present.

So, I pulled out this passage--which I intentionally included in the introduction of both my first and second books--to help me remember what the life I desire looks, feels and sounds like.

The life I desire is marked by a deep connection to my child and to my partner. It’s a life filled with joy and meaning. It’s a life in which I feel supported and nurtured by an incredible community of men and women—young and old. I experience regular, meaningful, heartfelt connections with people I care about. I am continually open to growth—as a woman, a mother, a partner and a spiritual being. I enjoy supporting and serving others in a way that feeds me rather than drains me. I feel that I always have enough time in my life for those things that are most important to me. My life flows, I trust my intuition and I expect good to come to me. I feel peaceful. I am loving and I feel loved. This is the life I desire.

It was only after I embarked on my self-care journey and truly began to connect to my needs and desires, that I was finally able to articulate this.

Oh (breath out)... yeah, that’s right! I needed that reminder.

May tomorrow be filled with clarity, a bit more light and perhaps even a small dose of Divinity.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event or workshop
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, join us for our May 17 class on Cultivating Inner Peace in Everyday Life, and read past issues of my Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photos: A lone birch tree takes a stand in the woods surrounding Kripalu in the Berkshires of Western Mass.

A Grateful Heart

2011-05-03T11:01:00.028-06:00

I was flipping through our family calendar this morning, which is filled with quotes from Pema Chodron, to see what’s scheduled for May. The quote from her book The Places that Scare You, jumped out at me:

“Rejoicing in ordinary things is not sentimental or trite. It actually takes guts. Each time we drop our complaints and allow everyday good fortune to inspire us, we enter the warrior’s world. We can do this even at the most difficult moments. Everything we see, hear, taste and smell has the power to strengthen and uplift us.”

I’ve been overflowing with gratitude all morning. It’s so delicious. It has the capacity to move us into this feeling state that can actually keep expanding and growing (it reminds me of that Star Trek episode, The Trouble with Tribbles, where the “tribbles” just kept multiplying!).

I returned late last night from facilitating a weekend Self-Renewal Retreat for women at Kripalu Yoga and Wellness Center in Mass. I didn’t bring my laptop, purposely slowed way down and made probably no more than 5 phone calls over the five days I was gone.

And while it was a work trip, I still spent a good deal of time soaking in the cool Berkshire mountain air, walking, doing yoga/dance, meditating, having heartfelt conversation with my team members, soaking in the latest perspectives/teachings on wellness, yogic lifestyle, stress management and I even got to dance with and receive a hug from the beautiful Mother Maya, who teaches Living Ahimsa—a vow which encourages us all to practice non-violence towards self and others. A particularly relevant and thoughtful message given the major political news I returned to today.

After finishing an expansive meditation this morning (it’s amazing how much more spacious our minds can become when we “unplug” for an extended period), I could feel waves of gratitude spreading and amplifying through my body. This morning I paused to celebrate and give thanks…

For the gift of sight and to be able to drink in all the green growth of springtime.

For the amazing, other-worldly natural foods cuisine the Kripalu kitchen staff lovingly prepared for the more than 700 people who were on-site this past weekend.

For the supportive tribe and community that helped care for Jonah while I was away leading the retreat (and that always step up to support me when I travel for work).

To my sweet, wonderful husband and all the ways he supports our family’s physical, emotional, spiritual and financial well-being.

For the opportunity to help women reconnect with who they are and live from the inside out … and for the self-care ripples that occur when they return to their families, communities and workplaces.

For the brilliant team of women and students I get to work with day in and day out—what blessings each of you are in my life!

For the abundance of personal and professional support that surrounds me and continually flows my way.

For the deep, nourishing friendships I have cultivated that sustain me on so many levels. I appreciate these more every day and am so grateful for the opportunity to be vulnerable and show up “warts and all.”

For the myriad of life experiences I’ve had which were catalysts for helping me grow and evolve into the person I am becoming (let the journey continue!).

For the life-changing event I had at Dachau in 1996 which helped me awaken to the life I truly desire and my calling to help us all come into balance.

For the amazing connections and synchronicities that occur daily in my life that support me in remembering who I really am and what I’m here to do.

To my son and my siblings/extended family for being such amazing teachers and for never letting me fall into status quo or get “too comfortable!”

To my sweet, wonderful body and soul which allow me to experience what it’s like to be human, be spirit and all the vastness that lies in between.

P.S. I’ll be back at Kripalu Oct. 14-16 leading another Self-Renewal Retreat if you want to experience some of this yumminess and see the blaze of fall color!

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event or workshop
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, and read my April Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration
The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photos: After finishing a full and intense weekend of teaching and facilitation, I relaxed on the front lawn at Kripalu looking out at the Berkshire mountains while enjoying a piece of vegan pumpkin pie and hot rosehips/lavender tea.

What Makes Me Happy ... Now

2011-04-19T15:49:00.036-06:00

Last week my son had a couple of days off from school and we headed to visit family in San Antonio—one of the ten largest cities in the U.S., one of the most overweight cities in America and a population that frankly, loves to shop, party and constantly be on the go!

It was wonderful to have time with my family, to celebrate my baby sister’s birthday and to hold my “chunk of love” nephew, Luca.

But returning to Austin this weekend—after non-stop activity and eating a lot of stuff I don’t normally consume—I felt heavy, lethargic, moody, stiff and sluggish.

I love to indulge now and again and didn’t beat myself up about my choices (French toast over fresh air and a jog around the neighborhood), but I couldn't help but notice the contrast between what I used to eat and do to feel good, versus what I do today to enhance my well-being.

What Used to Make Me Happy in the Old Days
-Eating out and big, fancy meals (the richer the better … no such thing as “over the top!”)
-Shopping (it didn’t matter how much I spent or what I bought, I was partaking in America’s favorite pasttime--buying was fun!)
-Over the top sensory experiences: festivals, art shows, big crowd events (not that I don’t love these occasionally now, but 2-3 times a year is plenty nowdays!)
-Being outdoors and hiking (but truly only if it accompanied a big cookout, feast, or food/drink-centric soiree)
-A full schedule and lots of activity, stimulation, things to see and places to go!
-A large circle of interesting, diverse friends—it was not uncommon for me to have 2-3 “play dates” on a Saturday with different friends at different locales

What Makes Me Happy These Days
-Cooking for a small group of friends and family and enjoying really fresh, delicious, in-season, local fruit and veggies (nothing better than a plum or peach at peak of season—even better if I get to pick it!)
-Spending time just being with my family (hanging in the back yard in a hammock, playing Ruckus or cooking a meal together)
-Long, quiet expanses of unscheduled time with and without friends--this is luxurious
-As much time in nature as possible: vigorous hikes at Big Bend, lazy walks around the lake, hanging out in our neighborhood park, exploring Yosemite or the redwoods with my family or camping on the Olympic Peninsula
-Lazy stretches of time for heartfelt conversation with close friends and family—maybe over food/tea or maybe not (it’s important to me to have people in my life that allow me to show up “warts and all!”)
-Moving my body daily through yoga, dance, hikes, walks with friends, canoeing or anything else that feels really pleasureful (I wholeheartedly believe exercise should be fun!)

Sure there are things I’ve loved since a young age that I still enjoy (reading is one!) and I know having a family changes everything, but my big ah-ha recently is that I now approach the idea of "feeling good" from a different perspective.

I want to nourish my body, mind and spirit. I desire a sustained feeling of well-being (not the 10 minute rush I get from finding a great deal at Target or eating an ice cream sundae).

And that comes from consciously choosing things that truly nurture me.

Because as delightful as they are, fresh out of the oven Toll House cookies will never feed me on a deeper level, but sitting quietly out under a full moon and a huge dark sky filled with thousands of stars, does.

An invitation: Are you interested in slowing down and truly nourishing your body, mind and spirit, tapping into the Transformative Power of Self-Care and enjoying the warm company of like-minded women? Join me April 29-May 1 at Kripalu for my Reflect, Reclaim, Re-Balance: Women’s Self Renewal Retreat in the Berkshires of MA (this retreat center is one of my favorite places on planet earth!)

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event including our April 29-May 1 Kripalu Self-Renewal Retreat in the Berkshire Mountains of MA
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, and read my April Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration
The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: A beautiful, fragrant lavender farm we visited while on vacation on the Olympic Peninsula, WA state.

We Need Each Other

2011-04-11T18:55:00.033-06:00

Yesterday afternoon my nine year old ran away from home.

He only went 2 blocks. He was barefoot and was carrying a cigar box filled with a Whole Earth Provision gift card, fifteen dollars and a birthday gift certificate from his uncle for bowling. He told me this was what he planned to use to support his new life.

He returned after about 15 minutes (meanwhile, my poor husband was cruising up and down the streets frantically looking for him!) but the experience—which followed a very emotional weekend for my young guy-- was intense for all.

Last night after a warm bubble bath and stories/a long cuddle session with mom, my son shared that being away from us was the scariest thing he had ever experienced. In his words, “he felt so alone …and vulnerable.” And, “It made me think of all the people out there in the world that feel this way everyday. That don’t have anybody.”

A few weeks ago, I led a small business retreat for a group of female entrepreneurs. The one piece of feedback I can’t get out of my head was from a woman who tearfully shared that this retreat was her first experience to be in the company of other women in this manner…a circle …feeling safe, nurtured and empowered. No egos, no competition, just unconditional support and enough “space” for everyone to show up just as they are.

I pretty regularly ask for and receive help now—both professional and personal—but I’m also remembering a time not long ago, where this was a very foreign concept to me. (Read my chapter on Building a Support Network here.)

Growing up as the oldest of seven kids, I look back now and see the predominant theme or message of “going it alone” was our family’s modus operandi.

Besides the distinct absence in our day-to-day lives of aunts, uncles, grandparents, family friends, ministers, close neighbors—a tribe that we could call on when things got stressful—my siblings and I rarely even asked our mom and dad for help. And, while I see the gifts that have come from being uber- independent, in the long run, it doesn’t serve to navigate choppy waters …alone ..in a small rowboat … when a nice big yacht replete with supplies and sailors is sailing by.

When I became a mom 9 years ago, I was forced to learn the lesson that we’re meant to be interdependent, we need each other. It’s our birthright to give and receive help. And, to be in community and connection with one another on a regular basis (read more on the gifts that come from this).

In fact giving from our hearts and allowing others to support us can be a spiritual practice for both parties (as my girlfriend shared yesterday who is caring for her husband who is very ill).

So yes my sweet son, it can feel scary at times to be alone. And while flying solo is not bad—you also learned one of life’s most important truths: tribes are good. We all need each other. And asking for and learning to receive help is what it’s all about.

An invitation: Are you interested in learning to let go and receive support, tap into the Transformative Power of Self-Care and enjoy the warm company of like-minded women? Join me April 29-May 1 at Kripalu for my Reflect, Reclaim, Re-Balance: Women’s Self Renewal Retreat in the Berkshires of MA (this retreat center is one of my favorite places on planet earth!)

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event including our April 29-May 1 Kripalu Self-Renewal Retreat in the Berkshire Mountains of MA
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, and read my April Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Time

2011-04-05T09:15:00.016-06:00

This past weekend I attended a Yoga for Wellness workshop at my favorite yoga studio with the beautiful, passionate Italian-born Mirka Kraftsow.

Most think of yoga as a series of postures, but movement or “asana” is only one of the eight limbs of yoga. These past few days, we studied some of the other limbs or teachings of this 5,000 year old philosophy.

After a slow, yummy weekend of gentle movement, meditation, singing, journaling and study of ancient yogic teachings, I just couldn’t bring myself to jump back into “business as usual” Monday morning. So, I took the morning off and created space for contemplation.

Sunday evening as my husband and I sat on our back porch under the stars after my son had gone to bed, I commented, “I have so much to do tomorrow, am I crazy to take 5 hours off tomorrow for spiritual renewal and reflection?” His reply, “Is there anything you have to do that’s really more important?”

I think my strong desire to slow down my “doing” this morning and just “be” (read more from my post on this theme), was my rebellious attempt to in some way suspend time.

One of my favorite things in the world is the opportunity –alone and with my family-- to enjoy expanses of unscheduled time.

So in that vein, I moved slowly … locked “time” in the garden shed with the rusty old tools … made myself a big mug of Moroccan green tea … watched the rain … meditated on the back porch … lit a favorite candle … leisurely reviewed my notes and drawings from the workshop … at some salted cashews … and avoided looking at the clock as much as possible.

In some ways I feel it’s my responsibility-- after attending a rich, deep workshop like this-- to take time off the next day to give these “seeds” some fertilizer, some space to grow before I returned to everyday life. (Nothing like three hours on the computer replying to countless emails to kill a fresh, new idea or perspective!)

One of the Niyamas (a limb of yoga and set of ethical guidelines that when practiced can bring greater awareness and insight to our lives) we explored this past weekend that most deeply resonated with me is Ishvara Pranidhana, which means to surrender. Or, let go of our need to control.

And while I’ve come a long way around control, I still have a long way to go. But I’m noticing the more I can let go—around my son’s food allergies, my husband’s lack of exercise, or scheduling at work—my mind is less busy. My thoughts are fewer and far between. I feel more peaceful and trusting and my overall emotional and spiritual well-being is greatly enhanced. Funny how that happens!?

And, I’m realizing in this moment as I write this, that choosing to chuck my work responsibilities this a.m. and just “let go” was a great way to honor this insight. And hopefully to strengthen it.

Ahhhh, a noise: it’s time. I hear her banging on the old tool shed door. I guess I need to go and let her out. She’s getting impatient. And who knows what would happen if I forgot about her altogether.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event including our April 29-May 1 Kripalu Self-Renewal Retreat in the Berkshire Mountains of MA
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, and read my March Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly. (Note: This blog post appeared in a similar format in 2010. It is so timely, I had to share it again.)

Painting: Salvador Dali, painter, 1904-1989

Doing vs. Being

2011-03-27T19:00:00.018-06:00

This is the time of year that many of us feel more like human doings than human beings.

Yesterday afternoon, my husband and son went out to work on costumes for one of my husband’s upcoming Samba School gigs.

I had been looking forward to this rare present all day: two to three hours of quiet time alone in my house!

After they left, I hopped online to take care of a few timely work-related items (rare for me as I try to stay offline on the weekends).

Forty-five-minutes later, I looked up and—irritated-- felt the sands of time sifting through my fingertips. My mind raced to all the things I had wanted to do during this window—gardening, hiking, baking, cleaning out my closet, “pure fun” reading, biking (it was gorgeous and sunny in Austin yesterday). And as I noticed all of these distractions waving and running by with hopeful smiles like contestants on the Price is Right, I found my irritation subsiding and realized what I really needed to “do”—was nothing at all.

Finally surrendering, I grabbed a Mexican blanket, headed out into our backyard, found the warmest, sunniest spot I could and laid down on the grass.

Can you relate to any of this?

I think there are three kinds of people:
1. Those who feel they have to “do” to be worthy (they’re constantly in motion; this was me up until about age 35)
2. Those who feel they need to “do their work” before they relax and play (I’m in this camp with millions of other Puritan work ethic devotees)
3. Those who have no guilt ever about relaxing and playing at any time! (My husband sleeps here—in his book “any time is the right time for relaxing!”)

The wonderful, wise author/mind-body expert Joan Borysenko, Ph.D. says, "Remember—your to-do list is immortal. It will live on long after you’re dead."

Being very skilled at the “doing dance,” I can honestly share that it’s quite seductive.

We’re rewarded –particularly in the U.S.—for output. Our national anthem is "Just Do It!" (You don’t hear anyone say, “Can you believe how often she says ‘no’ and how much she’s slowed down? Wow, what a role model!”)

There are many dangers that come from over-doing, but I think one of the deadliest—and scariest for me when I go into over-drive-- is we forget who we are.

I’ve heard many of our Career Strategists clients share in the last ten years “Isn’t there more? I feel like I just go to work, take care of the kids, handle my endless work/home obligations, sleep on the weekends and then start all over again Monday morning.”

When we don’t balance “doing” with “being,” we begin to feel like robots instead of the juicy, creative, vibrant, alive beings that we are.

And we forget that “Life is not a thing to be managed, it’s a mystery to be lived.”

I don’t know about you, but I’ll take pondering life's mysteries over finding a new way to cook chicken breasts, any day.

Onward through the week ... with a bit more mindful attention to balancing being with doing. The best I can.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event including our April 29-May 1 Kripalu Self-Renewal Retreat in the Berkshire Mountains of MA >Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, join us for March 31st life balance teleclass and read my March Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly. (Note: This blog post appeared in a similar format in 2010. It is so timely, I had to share it again.)

Ripe

2011-03-21T18:15:00.025-06:00

I just returned from Big Bend National Park Sunday night with my husband and son.

I sat out under a million stars, galaxies and a moon so bright it hurt my eyes. I experienced deafening quiet. I walked across deserts and over boulders until my legs were numb. I sensed my smallness, my bigness, our interconnectedness and how powerful, gentle, awesome and brilliant nature can be.

I crave these feelings and this level of stillness and solitude (you can hike for miles and not see a soul). That’s why we usually sojourn to Big Bend annually—one of the least visited but most unforgettable places I’ve ever been, Istanbul and Palenque included.

Every time I go—without fail—I have wild, almost hallucinogenic dreams, big ideas and visions, access to totally new perspectives, unique and life changing insights and the unclear becomes clear. Sometimes instantly. Maybe it’s because it’s like going into a sensory deprivation tank—the absence of sound, media, people and visual stimuli leave you to the expanses of your inner frontier.

Friday evening before I went to bed, I drew an inspirational card from a Zen deck my brother gave me several years ago. I asked for any insight or guidance around where I am right now—professionally and personally.

I got “Ripe.”

Ripe. As in ready to birth what’s next. Ready to pack my bags and visit the hidden chambers within my depths and dust off, drag out and bring forth the treasures that lie within. Ready to share what’s been brewing and is asking to come forth to be seen and heard. Ready to write. Ready to create, irregardless of the outcome or as Wayne Dyer says, “the good opinion of others.” Ready because it’s my time. And what’s coming through me is unique and deserves to have a voice.

When I woke up this morning, Dawna Markova’s beautiful poem called to me (one of my favorites to read it when I led career change workshops for professionals).

Perhaps if you’re ripe, it will speak to you as well.

I will not die an unlived life.
I will not live in fear
of falling or catching fire.
I choose to inhabit my days,
to allow my living to open me,
to make me less afraid,
more accessible,
to loosen my heart until it becomes a wing,
a torch, a promise.
I choose to risk my significance;
to live so that which came to me as seed
goes to the next as blossom
and that which came to me as blossom,
goes on as fruit.
-Dawn Markova

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event including our April 29-May 1 Kripalu Self-Renewal Retreat in the Berkshire Mountains of MA or my March 25th Small Business Visioning/Planning Retreat
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses, join us for March 31st life balance teleclass and read my March Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Image: A juicy, quite ripe plum.

Stardust

2011-03-14T14:59:00.038-06:00

Imagination is your preview of life's coming attractions.--Albert Einstein

I’ve always been fascinated with the idea of creating something out of nothing.

I just spoke at and participated in RISE global week (grassroots, city-wide, peer-led entrepreneur conference) in Austin and was in heaven. I had the same feeling in 2000 when I attended my first International Coaches Federation professional conference with 3,000 coaches from around the world---energized, excited and a sense of coming home. I was with my peeps.

Entrepreneurs are an interesting bunch. Doug Ulman, CEO of LiveStrong said Friday night at the RISE Fast Pitch, “Entrepreneurs see a need, they solve a problem and are driven to serve.” And, I would add, they say “yes” when many say no.

Being an entrepreneur is not everyone’s cup of tea. But, those who take the plunge usually agree: they feel they didn’t have a choice. They ultimately did “that which they MUST do.”

I distinctly remember fighting my inner compass which kept clearly pointing to the path of self-employment back in 1999. I think if I would have foregone this route, I would have combusted or gone crazy. I had to follow my heart and birth what was begging to come forth—regardless of how bumpy the road ahead appeared to be.

My first business was formally launched in 2000 (I was in labor for 2 years before she arrived) and my second in 2007 (which was never meant to be a business; those are usually the best kind) and I also launched a publishing arm (Balanced Living Press) that same year.

It’s mind boggling when you think about creating something out of thin air. Yes, most of us have done our due diligence, established a need, researched the marketplace and synthesized years of related experience before we launch. But starting a business is always a big risk, and ultimately we’re still testing our “recipe,” hoping our hunch, idea, nudge or feeling wasn’t just something we took action on after a late night and too many glasses of wine!

When I asked the 25 women in my RISE session last Thursday morning to share why they started their businesses, I heard: I wanted to more fully express my potential … share my creativity … make a difference in kids lives … communicate my ideas … be in charge of my time … experience more purpose-driven work and … I was tired of giving all my ideas and time away to a company that was getting rich off of me!. Not one person said it was just to make money.

These women, myself included, are what Mark Henricks, author of Not Just a Living: The Complete Guide to Creating a Business That Gives You a Life calls lifestyle entrepreneurs. People who are turning to entrepreneurship to support the life they have always dreamed of.

Looking back now on the last twelve years I see how the seeds I planted have blossomed, grown and are beginning to stand on their own in the garden. They’ve got roots.

If someone would have told me in the nineties (as I slogged through various challenging, often bureaucratic but always intellectually stimulating marketing communications/PR positions) that ten years later, I’d have two businesses, be my own boss, have the option to take Fridays off, work with whomever I wanted, published two books and be working on my third, and be collaborating daily with an amazing team of like-minded women, I would have had a very hard time conceiving that this life was possible.

I just picked up Daphne Rose Kingma’s book The Ten Things to Do When Your Life Falls Apart (New World Library) as research for my new book project on everyday spirituality. It’s a great resource (it just won a prestigious spiritual book award) and I remember Daphne sharing in an interview that the messages in the book were “given to her.”

I so resonate with this. I think this is what we experience as entrepreneurs, as well.

On the outside-in, it may look like authors, artists, musicians and innovators are creating something out of nothing … out of stardust. But, in reality, we’re just making ourselves available and receptive to receive what’s ready to be birthed …what is ours to breathe in and exhale, to share with others.

We just happened to have said “yes”--after we could no longer bear the unrelenting tapping on our shoulder--to giving the idea a voice, a stage, a chance.

A Personal Invitation: Are you self-employed and feel overwhelmed, pulled in too many directions or in extreme need of a day completely devoted to gaining clarity/focus around your business direction? Every quarter I take a one-day retreat to help me stay on track and focused on what matters most. I'm now inviting my friends to join me. Learn more about my 3/25 Small Business Visioning/Planning Retreat.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:
>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event including our April 29-May 1 Kripalu Self-Renewal Retreat in the Berkshire Mountains of MA
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses and read my March Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Image: Stardust--a large number of distant stars appearing to the observer as a cloud of dust.

Be Here Now ... Really?!

2011-02-27T13:40:00.041-06:00

Growing up, my parents used to quote a lot of annoying phrases to me.

They were boomers, intellectuals and spiritual seekers, and were always looking for new perspectives and teachings to expand their minds. (My dad liberally quoted passages to us daily from Einstein, the Bible, Wayne Dyer, Swami Satchidananda, St. Francis of Assisi, Marianne Williamson and others.)

Being big fans of author/spiritual teacher Ram Dass, they often would tell my six siblings and me to just “Be here now!”(read more) when we begged them to take us to a movie or the mall. You can imagine how that was received in teenage ears!

I don’t recall them being overly present during much of the time we were growing up (certainly challenging with 7 kids!), but Lord knows they tried.

This phrase “Be here now” flooded back to me this weekend as I sat on the couch with a nasty full-body cold, wanting to be …at the creativity party I was missing …at my son’s piano recital with my husband … upstairs cleaning my office … outside working on the garden … online sharing about my Friday spring renewal retreat … at yoga class … really, anywhere but where I was. Sick. At home. Immobile.

As a life balance teacher/writer/speaker, I'm very passionate about enhancing the emotional and spiritual health of American families. And, I find it interesting that so many stress management gurus and spiritual teachers believe the answer to everything is to just “Be here now … or be with what is.” (Read more on “Being with what is.”)

Many of them say all suffering and emotional distress would end if we simply stopped resisting being in the moment. If we embraced the "Now." But, boy, when your head is about to split in two, your body feels like wet spaghetti and your nose is running like a faucet-- that can feel really challenging.

But, because I know that discomfort often brings amazing gifts, I was willing to explore this and at least take a look at what would happen if I stopped resisting my uninvited house guest Franny Flu for a while.

As I allowed myself to be sick and be with other scenarios in my life that seem “counter to my desires”—I could feel a sense of peace and quiet settle over me.

And, as I temporarily suspended expectations about work, relationships and other interactions--out went their siblings: worry, anxiety and stress.

So, it looks like there’s something here worth exploring. And, as my dad would say, “You never know when you’ll bump up against enlightenment.” It might even reside at the bottom of a Kleenex box.

A personal invitation: Do you feel overwhelmed, pulled in too many directions or in extreme need of a day completely devoted to enhancing your sense of inner peace and well-being? Join me this Friday, March 4 at Reflect, Reclaim, Re-Balance: Spring Self-Renewal Retreat. Hope to see you there!

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:
>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event including our March 4 Lost Pines Women's Self-Renewal Retreat coming up this Friday; this is our last Texas retreat until November--bring a friend and save
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses and read my February Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration
The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photos: Renee Peterson Trudeau; fresh picked raspberries from a farm on the Olympic Peninsula. These babies went straight into cornmeal almond pancakes--yum!

Waves

2011-02-22T16:55:00.059-06:00

This past weekend, my family headed to the Texas coast for a 48 hour date with Mother Nature.

We have not taken a vacation since my husband was laid off last summer from his software job (he’s on a short-term contract gig right now) and we really needed a break.

In general, we like to take frequent, easy vacations as opposed to one big one, so we’ve really been missing our regular jaunts to New Mexico, Big Bend, the Gulf of Mexico, the Davis Mountains and other favorite southwest U.S. haunts.

The weekend was just what we needed. We saw beautiful pelicans, dolphins, a huge variety of birds (a birding couple had traveled from Australia to Port Aransas to see a rare seagull that was flying through!), turtles, jellyfish, crabs, collected shells during sunrise, ate mahi mahi and shrimp while watching the sunset and enjoyed laughing and being together. My almost 9-year-old son only said he was “bored” twice!

My son and I love to walk on the beach in the early hours of the morning while my husband sleeps in and see what washed ashore while we were sleeping. We both find such delight in exploring the untouched shores barefoot and scanning the wet sand for treasures and sea life.

It’s been a couple of years since we came to the beach as a family. As I trolled up and down the shore with my son, watched the waves crash and fall and felt the magnetic pull of the earth and ocean under my bare feet, I was struck by how different I felt on this visit compared to coast trips I've taken in the past.

The only way I can describe it is to say I feel “quieter” on the inside. And, there’s a heightened unmistakable sense of ease, compassion and self-acceptance present. If I had to guess, I attribute this in large part to a now regular meditation practice. And, a clear intention to more and more release and let go (read more).

That’s not to say that I don’t experience emotional and ups and downs (like the waves I watched with utter fascination as they crashed against the granite jetty!), but my inner “home” is just a bit mellower.

Interesting. It was great to get away. It was great to allow nature to heal us. And, it was nice to know that as my outer body evolves and ages, my inside is evolving, too. Slowly but surely.

I hope you can join us this Thursday, Feb. 24 from 7:30-8:30 p.m. CST for our Live Inside Out Teleclass with my good friend Dianna Amorde on "Love the One You're With ...That's You! Finding Self-Acceptance." Learn more here.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:
>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event including our 3/4 Lost Pines Women's Self-Renewal Retreat coming up soon (early bird rate ends 2/25; this is our last Texas retreat for a while)
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses and read my February Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photos: Renee Peterson Trudeau, the Gulf of Mexico, February 2011.

I Choose Love

2011-02-13T20:30:00.029-06:00

Twelve years ago, right before I got married, I vividly remember living in an apartment in central Austin with my husband-to-be and reading Return to Love by Marianne Williamson.

The book’s messages changed my life. The core theme that I think about everyday is there are only ever two choices in life: love or fear.

Everything we do is either motivated by love--which allows us to trust in the flow of life and expect good to come to us--or fear, which causes us to doubt, constrict and cut ourselves off from others. (Think about it—all expansive feelings are born from love and the scared or worried feelings can always be traced back to fear.)

I choose love.

I want to relax into the flow of life. I want to be open and receptive to those I come in contact with. I want to trust that “the Universe is conspiring in my favor,” and that the days and months ahead will be filled with many good things to come. I want to always feel like there is more than enough for everyone in every situation. I want to always remember that the more I love myself, the more I am able to love and have compassion for those around me. I want to have a soft and open heart.

Don’t you?

I attended a women's appreciation dinner tonight and each of us shared a favorite love poem. I explored bringing a favorite passage from Mary Oliver, Hafiz, Rumi, David Whyte and others, but I kept getting pulled back to the following famous passage from Marianne Williamson (below).

My dad gave this poem to me right before he died suddenly from a heart attack in 1996. I think his final words of wisdom were quite appropos and as I continue to expand into more self-love and self-acceptance daily, I hope I am able to inspire others to do the same. Happy Valentines Day--let your light shine.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond
measure.

It is our light, not our darkness, that most
frightens us.

We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous,
talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?

You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world. There is
nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people
won't feel insecure about you.

We are all meant to shine, as children do.

We were born to manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give
other people permission to do the same. As we are
liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically
liberates others.

Marianne Williamson

Photo: This 11x17 reminder is taped squarely on the front of our refrigerator. It helps me remember in some of my hardest moments--often parenting--that I choose love.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event including our 3/4 Lost Pines Retreat coming up soon!
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community; stop by and win a free Valentines Day Retreat package this week.
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses and read my February Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Welcome Mat

2011-02-07T20:38:00.022-06:00

I just finished writing our February life balance newsletter on emotional health and cultivating the ability to not take things personally. (Sign up here if you’d like to receive it on Wednesday.)

And for me, a big piece of emotional health has been allowing myself to feel what I’m feeling—regardless of whether or not I like it.

My brother Kert, a qi gong teacher currently living in China (read his fascinating blog on his experience here) has been one of my biggest teachers around allowing--rather than resisting--uncomfortable feelings to come knocking.

And, more and more I’m realizing the ability to “be” with what I’m feeling--rather than run from, ignore, stuff, avoid or “positive-thought” these visitors away—is essential to growing into who I’m meant to be. And, it’s also an opportunity to harvest the gifts that come from living with the light and the dark … with polarity (read more).

So as I approach the anniversary of my sweet brother’s death in a couple weeks, a time when I often feel particularly fragile, I plan to embrace and sit quietly with any visitors that may come calling. Regardless of the gifts they may bring. The welcome mat is out. The kettle is on. I’m ready when you are.

THE GUEST HOUSE
This being human is a guest house.

Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!

Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.

He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.

Be grateful for whatever comes.
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

-- Jelaluddin Rumi, 13th Century Mystic Poet

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses and read my January Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: Renee Peterson Trudeau. The skies and mountains of the Olympic Peninsula (WA state). Like the changing weather in the Pacific Northwest, our emotions come and go just as quickly. I recently read that a feeling, on average, only lasts 4-5 seconds.

Love the One You're With

2011-01-31T20:12:00.043-06:00

Love the one you’re with and that would be you. Bryon Katie, author

I’m about to overflow with insights and revelations. If I didn’t have so many deadlines this week, I’d grab my journal and pens, head for the nearest cave with a bag of pistachios and a jug of water and write, write, write!

This past week began with a solo personal planning retreat, followed by a screening of Race To Nowhere, then I led a beautiful Women’s Winter Self-Renewal Retreat and finally this weekend, I attended a Byron Katie seminar with two of my team members.

Just when I think it’s time to give up teaching the self-care message and move on, the Universe presents me with one case after another for why this work is so key and how crucial it is to our relationships (with self and others), our career paths, our emotional well-being and our spiritual development.

If I were holding an onion, self-care would be the outer layer, then a few layers deeper, I’d find self-acceptance. Then finally at the core: self-love. I see self-care as the doorway through which we must go to truly accept who we are, and ultimately, to begin to love ourselves.

I’ve been on the self-care journey for close to eleven years and I still have a long way to go.

Yet, reflecting on the gifts that have come to me from learning to love myself, I am grateful for where I am. (Friday night after returning from a long day at The Crossings, before my head hit my pillow, I entertained a bit of self-criticism: “Your energy was really low today, you weren’t as focused as usual,” followed by a compassionate reminder, “And you didn’t get any sleep on Thursday night and received an abundance of positive feedback about how meaningful the day was for those who attended.”) Self-love is definitely an ever-evolving process.

Practicing self-acceptance and self-love has helped me to:
-be more easy-going and to “go with the flow”
-see that little things stay little (my kid not picking up his toys) and don’t become front page news
-have more space around my thoughts and become more present
-be kinder and more compassionate to others (whether it’s a waitress, family member, car mechanic or business partner)
-feel and connect more deeply to God as opposed to experiencing God as a concept in my head
-react less and Live Inside Out more
-sense my connection to everything around me and how interwoven we all are

And most importantly, it’s helped me feel –more and more often--that everything is ok, no matter what happens. And ultimately, this ongoing sense of peace and well-being is what we’re all seeking, isn’t it?

Last night as I put my 8 year-old to bed, I played Long Time Sun for him (this version is from Snatam Kaur's Feeling Good Today kids CD). Whenever I hear it, I am flooded with feelings of peace and self-love. I hope he feels the same.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend a retreat/event
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Teleclasses and read my January Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: A retreat attendee enjoying the beautiful weather at Kripalu; join me April 29-May 1 in the Berkshire Mountains in MA at this amazing yoga and wellness center.

Letting Go

2011-01-18T15:30:00.060-06:00

As I write the theme for this post in the subject line above, I can feel half my body applauding loudly and the other half saying, “Really?!”

Sitting at my desk at work right now surrounded by tax forms, to-do lists, contracts to review and pistachios--I’m juggling one of our cars being in the shop after a recent costly repair last month, my almost-nine-year-old in total disequilibrium (he confessed this morning he was taking “shots” of chocolate syrup from the fridge after his breakfast didn’t “cut it”), preparing to lead a teleclass this week with my brother, doing a TV interview tomorrow, managing hormonal ups and downs, responding to staff/clients requests, training 2 new staff members who started Monday and preparing for our Jan. 28th Winter Self-Renewal Retreat and several other events immediately following.

My theme for 2011 is playful (different than “playing” –which I do quite a bit).

This theme arose from my deep desire to really take both hands off the wheel and let go in all areas of my life.

I decided that for me, letting go completely would look like being “playful” at work, at home and in relationships. I’ll keep you posted how this unfolds in 2011!

So today, as I was driving back from yoga class, I asked myself what does letting go really look like? Today, it’s:

-Committing to keeping self-care at the top of my list, even on days like today, when I feel stretched way too thin
-Surrendering my relationships with my partner, child and extended family to Spirit—a source much wiser and larger than myself
-Trusting that I will listen, allow synchronicity to unfold and be guided exactly how best to use my talents, energy, time and resources to serve others
-Allowing myself to hit the “reset” button as often as I need to, and begin anew each day
-Remembering that I’m not alone and that asking for help allows me to release control and embrace “good is good enough”

I shudder to think how controlling I was in my twenties (I don’t think I’d want to be friends with her if we were to meet on the street today!).

I got a lot better in my thirties--having Jonah helped with this--and now at 45, I’m really ready to release the need to have things go my way. Because when things "look" like they're going my way, it's all a big illusion anyway. Isn’t it? (If you're in Austin, don't miss the opportunity to see Byron Katie Jan. 28-29. She taught me a lot about control.)

One of the quotes I love that's in The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal and always gets women laughing, is “For peace of mind, resign as general manager of the Universe.” Larry Eisenberg

Baby steps. Keep calm and carry on.

I love to hear from, connect with and meet The Journey readers at our events. I invite you to:

>Find Your Tribe: Join or become trained to lead Self- Renewal Groups
>Attend my Jan. 28th Self-Renewal Retreat or another retreat/event
>Join the Dialogue on our Live Inside Out Facebook Community
>Pick up The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal from the library or buy it here
>Download FREE Live Inside Out Telelcasses and read my January Life Balance newsletter
>Take Action: Contact one of our career or life balance coaches for 1-on-1 support; receive an initial complimentary consultation
>Empower Others: Schedule Renee Trudeau for a private workshop or retreat for your company or organization
>Subscribe to my life balance blog The Journey for weekly inspiration

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly. You can subscribe here.

Photo: One of my biggest teachers on the planet on the subject of playfulness: my younger brother Kert, a Qi Gong teacher. You can always count on Kert to find humor and silliness in EVERY situation! In this photo Kert and I (ages four and three) are discussing our next Life Balance Telelcass.

I Love My Body

2011-01-10T19:24:00.023-06:00

I celebrated my 45th birthday over this past weekend. But I didn’t feel social (unusual for me).

I just felt a strong pull to nest, rest and reflect—read more—so much so that I cancelled my long-anticipated workshop with Shiva Rea and instead spent a good part of Sunday alone enjoying a massage, a hot aromatherapy bath and a long rest.

When I awoke I was overcome with gratitude for my sweet 45-year old body and was inspired to write a letter to my dear old friend.

Dear 45-year old body:

I love you. I really do. I’m sorry it has taken me so long to arrive here, but regardless, I have!

I appreciate you in so many ways.

-I love you radiant face that gets more interesting and playful the older you get (and fascinating neck--it seems as if you're developing a personality of your own!).
-I love you sweet soft belly just the way you are. And, I’m amazed by your ability to grow a child that is now almost up to my chin!
-I love you open, inviting and accepting smile (and thank you teeth for staying so cavity-free!).
-I adore you bright blue green eyes that are filled with a mixture of insight, depth and curiosity.
-I love you full sweet, strong upper arms that give great hugs, will never be willowy and were inherited from Grandma Harrison (so I’m told).
-I love you constantly changing, ever-evolving torso that has shifted through stages including: strong and sexy, pudgy and pouty, feminine and flirty, tired and disconnected and fluid and fabulous!
-I love you hands (Nonnie’s hands) and the way you have supported me in writing, painting, expressing myself musically, cooking and serving others.
-I love you strong, sexy legs and flexible hips that can move, balance and support me in dancing and doing yoga for hours.
-I love you rapidly changing, looks-different-every-day skin—in all of your various stages, colors, creases, patterns, spots and spring to summer styles and looks (I promise I’ll start wearing sun screen more often to protect you!).
-I love you amazing feet—hail to the feet! You’ve carried me for thousands of miles from Big Sur to Egypt, from Oaxaca to Ephesus and around Lady Bird Lake twice a week for the last twenty years.
-I love you sweet, healthy breasts that have helped me embrace my femininity and have brought me from maiden to motherhood to middle age (oh the stories you hold!).
-I love you sometimes cranky, but always lovable knees--especially the small crinkles that are just starting to crash the party and how they suddenly make their entrance when I do a downward dog.

Sweet body, I so appreciate how you house my soul and allow me to live fully, laugh often, embrace pleasure, express love to those around me and enjoy motherhood, marriage, traveling, dancing, hiking and wrestling with my 8 year old.

I am so grateful for your vibrancy, energy and overall health. I promise to continue to listen and respond to your needs and desires in the coming years. And above all, I will do my best to love you through all the changes and evolutions that are yet to come.

Much love and deep gratitude—your best friend, Renee

FIND YOUR TRIBE, ATTEND A RETREAT/WORKSHOP OR JOIN THE DIALOGUE: Would you like support for learning to love and accept yourself and begin to attune to your needs and desires? Join or become trained to facilitate a Personal Renewal Group, or visit our calendar to learn more about our upcoming January career workshops, retreats and events (including our free 1/20 teleclass).

We love to hear from you. Please visit and join our Live Inside Out community to read how people are living more intentionally and share how you do the same.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: Me and my shadow at Pedernales State Park, December 2010.

Nourishment

2010-12-27T20:17:00.025-06:00

The morning after Christmas Day, my husband, son and I felt a little sluggish. We needed some fuel.

So after visiting with out-of-town guests, we did some yoga at home, hit the greenbelt for a long hike and then went to a family Kirtan at the Amala Foundation (thanks Austin Big Heart Yoga and friends for organizing—we loved it!). And at the end of the day, we felt good. And nourished.

Last night, my husband and I were sitting in front of the fire remembering not-so-distant holidays where overindulgence, overspending, overeating, oversleeping and other not-so-healthy patterns were the norm. There’s nothing wrong with indulging every once in a while, but invariably these slugfest sprees were followed by periods of remorse, guilt and often low moods.

As a writer/teacher who is fascinated by how we create more harmony and balance in our lives, I know it’s natural to regularly swing in and out of equilibrium. But what I’m noticing more often is that when I’m really in tune with my needs on a *deeper* level—when I’m focused on what will nourish me physically, emotionally and spiritually—I have less of a desire to over-indulge. And the magnetic pull towards things that will elevate my mood and overall well-being is much stronger.

The New World Dictionary says, to nourish means to feed or sustain with substances that promote life and growth.

As my son gets older and we are beginning to look at how we want to allocate our resources (money/time/energy), I’ve been thinking a lot lately about my parents and how they “fed” my siblings and me.

I don’t know how they did it (other than forgo expensive vacations and a lot of “stuff”) but growing up, all seven of us attended Montessori school, took a wide variety of music lessons, participated in art/painting/pottery classes and were given “carte blanche” when it came to purchasing books or making weekly trips to the library.

Even though my parents taught me very little about self-care or how to enhance my emotional well-being, they provided us nourishment through feeding us creative, mind-opening educations, providing us with constant exposure to the arts/culture and offering many opportunities for creative expression and intellectual stimulation (something I’ve only recently begun to fully appreciate).

I think how we choose to nourish ourselves, our families and those close to us, says a lot about our relationship to ourselves and what we value most. My personal experience has been that the kinder, more loving and more accepting I am of myself, the more nutrient-rich my “diet” becomes.

I wonder how my son will describe how we “fed” him years from now? I can only hope it was a balanced diet and that we taught him to seek out what he truly needs. With the occasional side of french fries every now and again.

FIND YOUR TRIBE, ATTEND A RETREAT/WORKSHOP OR JOIN THE DIALOGUE: Would you like support for identifying what truly nourishes you and how you can begin to attune to your needs and desires? Join or become trained to facilitate a Personal Renewal Group, or visit our calendar to learn more about our upcoming January retreats, workshops and events.

We love to hear from you. Please visit and join our Live Inside Out community to read how people are living more intentionally and share how you do the same.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: Tamari-glazed green beans with toasted almonds, crispy tofu and brown rice: our lunch today and one of our family's favorite nurturing and nourishing meals.

Letter to Luca

2010-12-13T16:17:00.025-06:00

From the time I was a little, I always felt babies were special (being the oldest of seven children, I got lots of practice welcoming newborns into the world). I always believed they were much more than blobs growing into themselves (check out What Babies Want or teachings from my friend/author and prenatal/perinatal expert Carrie Contey).

They seem to hold so much wisdom—maybe it’s because they’re fresh from God. And even though it was annoying to hear from my mother time and time again (especially when I was a hormonal, frustrated 13-year old)—I do believe we choose our families … our pods.

So, it’s especially touching to me to welcome my baby sister’s child to our tribe. And, his arrival has brought up a lot of emotions, insights and revelations for me. Riding this wave, these are the things I most want to share with my one-week old nephew as he adjusts to life on planet Earth:

Dear Luca:

• Be gentle with yourself, this is a big transition. It’s kind of like moving from Mars to Venus—it will take a while to unpack your bags and adjust to this crazy world (things are a bit wacky out there right now!)
• Always ask for help—you’re surrounded by people who are here to support you. We’re meant to be inter-dependent; you don’t have to go it alone!
• I’m so excited to learn what you’re here to teach us—we look forward to benefiting from all your wisdom and the lessons you’ll be calling forth.
• Thank you for reminding me about how I truly *desire* to be with my son Jonah and for giving me the opportunity to re-examine how I communicate with and raise my son.
• We can’t wait to see and experience all the gifts you’ll be bringing forth into the world and we look forward to supporting you in sharing your talents.
• Keep your sense of humor—we’re all doing the best we can and we all mess up a lot.
• Keep cultivating compassion—towards yourself, your family and all those you come in contact with. The world needs more of this.
• Great news!! You landed with a really fun, interesting, creative group of people. We’re a little zany, but we’re all excited to share our worlds with you!
• Thank you for reminding all of us about the power of being present—and all the gifts that come from being “right here, right now.”
• Know your cousin Jonah is over-the-moon excited that you’ve arrived and he loves you so much (yesterday he wrote a list of all the things he wants to teach you when you get older).
• And deep gratitude for reminding us that “Life is not a thing to be managed, it’s a mystery to be lived”; your arrival into our family is one of the best examples of this.

You picked the best mama and dad ever—they are soooo excited you’re here (they’re fighting over who gets to hold you). They love you like the breadth and depth of the sea.

Know that I am holding the highest/best for your journey here on earth and look forward to always being here for you. The song I would sing to you tonight is the Gayatri Mantra--the "mother of all mantras"--which is very famous, calming and harmonizing. It is said to unify body, mind and spirit when you chant it; Deva Premal says her mother sang this to her while she was in utero and as an infant.

Much love and deep appreciation---Auntie Renee

Photo: My son and his new cousin Luca at one day-old. Luca which means “bringer of light,” is a derivative of my sister’s middle name “Lucia” (light).

FIND YOUR TRIBE, ATTEND A RETREAT/WORKSHOP OR JOIN THE DIALOGUE: Would you like support for focusing on self-care and learning to slow down and be more present in your everyday life? Join or become trained to facilitate a Personal Renewal Group, or visit our calendar to learn more about upcoming retreats, workshops and events.

We love to hear from you. Please visit and join our Live Inside Out community to read how people are living more intentionally and share how you do the same.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Imagine A World Where ......

2010-11-28T14:54:00.013-06:00

A few days before Thanksgiving, I attended a yoga class. As I lay on my back relaxing before the teacher began, I could hear the light, easy, excited chatter in the room. You could feel the anticipation: a holiday break was coming!

Why were we all so happy? Because a holiday usually signals to the body, mind and spirit that you’re about to slow down, to unplug a bit, to spend more time connecting with family and to live at a more “normal pace”--rather than the 24/7 breakneck speed most Americans keep.

It got me thinking … what if we lived in a world where self-care (the concept of attuning and responding to your needs/desires) was an integral part of the fabric of our lives?

What if:
-Your boss approached you when you looked overwhelmed at work and said, “You need to say no to any new projects—you look overworked and you’ve already got too much on your plate.”
-Your kid said, “Forget about basketball practice tonight Mom--you need to stay home this evening and rest, you’ve been doing too much lately. It won’t matter if I miss one night.”
-Your best friend reminded you, “Be extra easy on yourself this week—the anniversary of your dad’s death is coming up, it’s a fragile time for you.”
-Your co-worker told you after you’d been beating yourself up all morning, “Cut yourself some slack about that presentation—it was your first time to deliver the new material, you did great.”
-Your Mom encouraged you, “Ask for help and let others support you—there’s no reason you need to juggle everything on your own. Call on your tribe.”
-Your neighbor reminded you “Practice ‘good is good enough’—the party doesn’t have to be perfect. People would rather have a happy, relaxed host than a sparkling clean home or homemade food.”
-Your husband called to say, “Be gentle with yourself right now, you’re in the middle of a lot of transitions; take a day off for rest and rejuvenation. I’ll pick up some Thai food on my way home and then bathe and put the kids to bed.”

Hmmmm …imagine a world where everywhere we went, we all encouraged one another to slow down, attune to our physical/emotional/spiritual and mental needs and the practice of self-care, self-compassion and self-nurturance became part of our value system. Part of our everyday experience.

It’s hard to envision, isn’t it?

It would have been hard for me to imagine eleven years ago that I would work, live and play the way I do now. (I probably would have called the current, more relaxed Renee-- a “slacker.”)

But what I've come to know after years of mindfully focusing on self-care and all that this has come to mean for me, is that I’m wiser, more prosperous, more focused, more productive and have more fun when I put my needs at the top of my to-do list before supporting and serving those around me.

And, the exciting thing? That those closest to me are beginning to do the same. Ripple on friends …and who knows, maybe a year from now we’ll all live in a world where each of us is a bit more kinder and gentler to our sweet selves than we were before. Imagine that.

FIND YOUR TRIBE, ATTEND A RETREAT/WORKSHOP OR JOIN THE DIALOGUE: Would you like support for focusing on self-care and learning to slow down and be more present in your everyday life? Join or become trained to facilitate a Personal Renewal Group, or visit our calendar to learn more about upcoming events.

We love to hear from you. Please visit and join our Live Inside Out community to read how people are living more intentionally and share how you do the same.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to life balance and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Ritual

2010-11-15T19:14:00.039-06:00

My baby sister, now 30, was only 16 when my father died and 19 when my mother died.

Being 14 years her senior, our relationship is a blend of sister/mother/mentor. But that’s changing.

She is having a baby, and I’m over the moon! Yesterday I hosted a blessingway for her at my home. About 12 women attended—mostly friends her age—but some relatives on her husband’s side and our sister-in-law, as well.

It was very emotional for me. Now that I’m a mother, I feel immense sadness that my parents are missing all these important moments in my siblings' lives—college graduations, job promotions, weddings, personal and professional achievements, new babies. The things I can’t wait to experience with my son as he grows older.

I spent hours Sunday morning getting ready for the gathering (being about as non-crafty as they come, I was very proud when I successfully hobbled together a simple handmade flower wreath to adorn her head!). I missed my normal Sunday spiritual practice, but the process of thoughtfully and contemplatively preparing for her arrival, felt like a ritual unto itself.

The women joining us had never attended a blessingway and I have a feeling it might have been a very new and unusual experience for them to come together with other women in such an intimate way.

We gathered in a circle on the floor in our front room. I shared some stories about growing up with four brothers and how excited I was when the “surprise twins” made their entrance—much to my 40 year old mother’s surprise-- and one of them was a girl! And, I talked about the significance of women’s circles, my sister’s journey from maiden to mother, the importance of asking/for receiving help from a tribe and then we all took turns “gifting” my sister with qualities to support her as a new mother and honoring her beautiful kind, generous and wise heart. As we did so, we strung together beautiful, thoughtfully chosen, symbolic charms and beads for her to later create a necklace from and wear during labor and blessed special “birthing” candles that each woman would leave with and light as soon as they get the word that my sister’s labor has begun. I was surprised by how moved many of the women were by this ceremony and ritual.

I’m a big fan of creating moments for and experiencing sacredness and ritual as much as possible in our everyday lives. Whether it’s prayers of gratitude before meals, guided/soulful reflection at the retreats I lead, intention setting before a movement class, morning and evening meditations, family “support circles” at home or thoughtfully creating a Day of the Dead altar, I crave and regularly seek out opportunities for sacred moments and ceremonies both big and small.

I think we all need ritual and opportunities and encouragement to connect to the sacredness of life throughout our days/weeks. It helps us remember that “Life is not a thing to be managed, but a mystery to be lived.”

And just like birth—one of life’s most awe-inspiring and mind-boggling mysteries—these moments help remind us that we’re all swimming in the same big, vast, miraculous and awe-inspiring ocean.

FIND YOUR TRIBE, ATTEND A RETREAT/WORKSHOP OR JOIN THE DIALOGUE: Would you like support for focusing on self-care and learning to slow down and be more present in your everyday life? Join or become trained to facilitate a Personal Renewal Group, or visit our calendar to learn more about upcoming events.

We love to hear from you. Please visit and join our Live Inside Out community to read how people are living more intentionally and share how you do the same.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to life balance and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: Renee Trudeau--photos from her sister's beautiful blessingway. We can't wait to meet you baby G!

Right Here, Right Now

2010-11-07T19:55:00.026-06:00

Following a rich, connective one-day self-renewal retreat I facilitated on Friday, I attended and volunteered at GenAustin’s statewide We Are Girls Conference at the Ann Richards School for Girls all day Saturday. It was an emotionally intense weekend and one of the experiences I can’t shake was during a self-care workshop I led for high school girls and mothers Saturday afternoon.

At the end of our interactive workshop session where we explored the concept of self-care and what our portals are for self-nurturing and nourishment, I gave each woman a juicy Clementine orange.

I invited them to close their eyes and “fill” the orange with whatever it is they most need right now –support, the ability to say no, peace/well-being, self-acceptance, courage,etc. After this reflective meditation, I asked them to slowly smell, peel and then very mindfully, eat their imbued orange—symbolizing the act of fully “receiving” the qualities they had just bestowed upon themselves.

All of the moms in the room—except for one—were single, working women juggling a thousand daily obligations.

After the exercise, they shared how difficult it was to slow down and become that present (I could relate—I had a hard time eating just one section of the orange at a time!). One woman remarked that in her day to day life, she was afraid to slow down that much. She was so tired that she worried if she ever stopped and really allowed herself to become present and feel her feelings, she might not be able to get up to speed again to her normal ninety to nothing pace.

I think most of us resist being present much of the time. It's hard.

But I also know from personal experience, that it’s one of the secrets to experiencing more peace, well-being and harmony in our day-to-day lives.

I’m going to keep a sweet baby Clementine orange on my desk this week at work as I move into an overly-busy schedule and back-to-back events Thursday through Monday.

I’m hoping this visual will help remind me to slow down, to be more conscious, present and remember that overwhelm happens when I live in the future and anticipate all the things that lie before me.

And, the opportunity to feel peaceful exists when I stay right here, right now. In this very moment. And, then the next moment. And then, the next.

"Something wonderful begins to happen with the simple realization that life, like an automobile, is driven from the inside out, not the other way around. As you focus more on becoming more peaceful with where you are, rather than focusing on where you would rather be, you begin to find peace right now, in the present. Then, as you move around, try new things, and meet new people, you carry that sense of inner peace with you. It's absolutely true that, "Wherever you go, there you are." Richard Carlson, author, “Slowing Down to the Speed of Life” and “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff …And, It’s All Small Stuff.”

FIND YOUR TRIBE, ATTEND A RETREAT/WORKSHOP OR JOIN THE DIALOGUE: Would you like support for reconnecting with who you are and focusing on being more present in your everyday life? Join or become trained to facilitate a Personal Renewal Group, visit our calendar to learn more about upcoming events.

Also, check out our Live Inside Out community and read how people are living more intentionally.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to life balance and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: Renee Trudeau--one of the juicy Clementine's from my self-care workshop.

Feeling the Mystery

2010-10-25T10:10:00.025-06:00

I just returned from a weekend yoga retreat at the rustic, quiet Margaret Austin Retreat Center, two hours east of Austin.

The weekend was led by two beautiful, gifted Vinyasa yoga teachers from Yoga Yoga (my yoga “home”). They did a wonderful job of creating a nourishing experience for all.

I attended the retreat with a dear friend and while I have to admit I had some misgivings about sleeping in a bunk bed in a room with strangers (initially at least), I fully embraced the experience: long, nourishing yoga sessions, time alone in nature, space to quietly meditate, out-of-this-world gourmet vegetarian food, the amazingly stunning full moon, the sounds of the wind/coyotes/owls/tall grass/birds/cows and time for heartfelt sharing with my friend.

I don’t know if it’s the act of unplugging for 48 hours, the immersion in a contemplative natural setting, the opportunity to slow waaay down and not have responsibilities tugging at my sleeve or my willingness to be open to whatever wants to emerge, but I always feel different and somewhat permanently altered after I take a retreat. It’s as if the experience brings me back to the “true” reality of life. My "lens" gets re-adjusted.

Last night I enjoyed a yummy dinner of veggie nachos on homemade corn tostadas and Asian arugula salad with almonds and oranges with my partner and son.

Afterwards I took time to really savor the experience of putting my eight-year old to bed—smelling his sweet,clean,just-washed wet hair, holding him tight and feeling his heartbeat, telling him a story about an adventurous wild boy in the woods (“make it scary mama!”) and kissing his sweet soft cheeks.

Going for a walk last night with a good friend, I shared with her how everything seems brighter, sharper and more vibrant after this weekend. Smells, sounds (the cicadas in the park next to my house sounded like they were preparing to launch into Vivaldi’s Four Seasons) touch, sight—all seemed amplified. I felt and still feel more alive (read more), more attuned to the nuances of my surroundings and more connected to the web of life.

I have always deeply resonated with the quote “Life is not a thing to be managed, it’s a mystery to be lived.” (Read more.)

As someone who has always liked to “get stuff done” and has danced her whole life with finding the balance between doing and being, it’s often easy for me to fall into the pattern of deriving a lot of my sense of accomplishment and worth from how I “manage life.” And, I’m sure like many of you multitaskers—we can do this quite well!

But the deeper invitation I feel called to respond to –at almost 45 years old—is to embrace, revel in and hang out as much possible in life’s mysteries.

Because, as someone who lost three family members early in life, I know that there will never be a time when I’ll lament not having finished a work or household task.

But if I’m not mindful, I might mourn the loss of not fully enjoying a big full moon in a dark night sky, the delicious, unmistakable smell a new baby’s head, moments of quiet stillness in the early morning mist or allowing my heart to fully open to those around me.

If you live in Texas (or are able to fly into Austin), consider joining me Friday, Nov. 5th at Lost Pines Hyatt Resort and Spa (on 400 acres on the Colorado River) at my Reflect, Reclaim, Re-Balance One Day Women’s Self-Renewal Retreat. It might just change your life. Or at the very least, your perspective on life.

FIND YOUR TRIBE, ATTEND A RETREAT/WORKSHOP OR JOIN THE DIALOGUE: Would you like support for reconnecting with who you are and focusing on your self-care? Join or become trained to facilitate a Personal Renewal Group, visit our calendar to learn more about upcoming events including our November 5th One-Day Reflect, Reclaim, Re-Balance Women's One-Day Self-Renewal Retreat (bring a friend and get a discount).

Also, check out our Live Inside Out community and read how people are living more intentionally.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to life balance and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: Renee Trudeau--the morning mist hanging over the grasses at the Margaret Austin Retreat Center.

Pause

2010-10-18T20:09:00.017-06:00

I was recently visiting with a friend and reminded her I’d be gone this coming weekend to attend a women’s retreat.

I could see her pause for a while, before she replied (we had just been discussing how challenging it can be on a family when one of the parents is unemployed and looking for work).

I signed up for this retreat quite a while ago, and thankfully, it’s very affordable. But her reaction got me thinking about ALL the reasons I’m such an advocate for retreats (read more) and why I not only lead them, I regularly take them--no matter what is going on in my life.

1. As Stephen Cope, director of Kripalu’s Institute for Extraordinary Living so eloquently states: “Retreats don’t change our lives as much as they change where we stand in relationship to our lives—and our capacity to see the hidden possibilities there.” Retreats challenge--and change-my perspective, usually radically.
2. Getting out of my normal environment and day-to-day routine and going somewhere new and different while I’m examining my life and career direction, has a HUGE effect on my well-being.
3. I look at a retreat as a “heavy date” with myself. It’s an opportunity to invest in my inner life---to really pull back, pause and get clear on what matters most.
4. Whenever I come back from a retreat—whether it’s a one day solo retreat or a week-long guided experience—I’m always amazed at how calm, wise, grounded and clear I feel. For me, taking a retreat is like hitting the “re-set” button.
5. In this age of digital overwhelm, one of the things I crave is the ability to really “unplug.” Retreats allow me to tap into my creative, free-thinking right-brain hemisphere and give my busy, multi-tasking left brain (and inbox) a break! And, I’m always amazed at how often I leave retreats with solutions to problems.
6. Retreats for me are a way for me to visit the “well” and replenish my energy reserves (physical/emotional/spiritual and mental).
7. The break and time with other women feels supportive, validating and is always a great reminder that I’m not alone. In some way, we’re all grappling with the same challenges and we all desire the same things. For me, retreats affirm our interconnectedness and remind me we really are all one.
8. Stepping away and slowing down allows me to reconnect to my body’s rhythms and get in touch with what it is I most need—physically and emotionally.
9. And most importantly, retreats really allow me to connect with my “wise self”—to tap into my inner wisdom and guidance and to really feel my connection to Spirit. They remind me about the importance of trusting in that which is greater than myself.

I’ve taken retreats for about ten years now and they’ve become central to my emotional and spiritual renewal.

Like many, my October is quite full (actually too full). But over the years, I’ve learned that this is exactly when I most need to take a retreat. And pause.

If you live in Texas (or are able to fly into Austin), consider joining me Friday, Nov. 5th at Lost Pines Hyatt Resort and Spa (on 400 acres on the Colorado River) at my Reflect, Reclaim, Re-Balance One Day Women’s Self-Renewal Retreat. It might just change your life. Or at the very least, your perspective on life.

FIND YOUR TRIBE, ATTEND A RETREAT/WORKSHOP OR JOIN THE DIALOGUE: Would you like to receive support from like-minded women and be with people who hold the highest and best for you? Join or become trained to facilitate a Personal Renewal Group, visit our calendar to learn more about upcoming events including our November 5th One-Day Reflect, Reclaim, Re-Balance Women's One-Day Self-Renewal Retreat (early bird ends 10/23).

Also, check out our Live Inside Out community and read how people are living more intentionally.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to life balance and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: Renee Trudeau--Julia Pfeiffer State Park, Big Sur, CA.

Meet Me on the Mountain Top!

2010-10-04T11:20:00.022-06:00

Early last week, after our son went to school, my husband and I took an early morning walk together.

This doesn’t happen often. Like most families, the mornings are usually very full. But we feel certain my husband will be working again soon and these rare opportunities to do out-of-the-ordinary stuff will be gone, so we grab them when we can!

We caught up on day-to-day activities, but had an ah-ha that when it came to the BIG life stuff, we weren’t really synched up.

Sure, we try to schedule time for date nights, meditate together most mornings and visit in the evenings after dinner, but here we were at major life junctures-- he is exploring/interviewing for new job opportunities and I’m in thd midst of creating new ideas/projects around everyday spirituality—and we weren’t harnessing or leveraging our collective power, intention and strengths.

It’s as if we have both been hiking in the woods—intersecting at rest stops—but neither of us had met the other on the mountain top in quite some time.

So, we cancelled all of our meetings and plans for last Wednesday and scheduled a visioning retreat together from 9-2 to specifically to focus on our careers, how/where we share our talents with the world and our highest vision for what we’re manifesting in our lives right now.

We meditated and prayed together, shared and read some inspirational readings, listed and voiced our talents to one another, created beautiful vision boards, enjoyed some yoga/stretching, had a luxurious lunch and finished with a walk and visit to my parent’s memorial bench on Town Lake where we did a gratitude sharing.

The vision boards were wonderful because when we were done, we each took turns sharing what images we had chosen and why—this was a great way to get a snapshot of where the other person’s thoughts and heart are focused right now. And, it allowed us to really synch up and align on a much higher level.

We both agreed it was the best use of five hours in a long time (interestingly, my husband received five calls from recruiters between 2-4 p.m. that day!).

I once heard a success coach say that professionally, people see their friends/family ten years out from where they actually are. I agree. We do typically hold the highest/best for those closest to us and can often see who they are becoming before they can.

But often we don’t slow down enough to share this vision or allow them to do the same for us. Maybe we should. Around our house, we always love the reminder: "Be careful--don't believe everything you think!" Seems a change in perspective and a few more visits to the mountain top could do us all a world of good.

P.S. If you read my blog regularly you know I’m a huge fan of retreats (many of my biggest shifts have happened on personal and group/guided retreats). I’ll be holding a one-day self-renewal retreat on Nov. 5th for women, but I ran across this great link this morning listing many fantastic spiritual retreats centers in the U.S. Enjoy—it’s a keeper.

FIND YOUR TRIBE, ATTEND A RETREAT/WORKSHOP OR JOIN THE DIALOGUE: Would you like to receive support from like-minded women and be with people who hold the highest and best for you? Join or become trained to facilitate a Personal Renewal Group, visit our calendar to learn more about upcoming events including our November 5th One-Day Reflect, Reclaim, Re-Balance Women's One-Day Self-Renewal Retreat and our FREE October 14th Live Inside Out teleclass on Being More Present and Remembering What Matters.

Also, check out our Live Inside Out community and read how people are living more intentionally.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to life balance and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: Renee Trudeau--the view from a mountain top on the Olympic Peninsula, WA.

Exquisite Self-Care

2010-09-27T12:31:00.018-06:00

Last night we had some friends over for dinner and I ate something that I’ve been off of for about six weeks. And, it made me feel like crap. My husband would say—since my dairy and wheat intolerances manifest as emotional disequilibrium---I acted like crap, too!

This morning I woke up really thinking about the concept of exquisite self care. Not plain, vanilla, just doing the basics to feel good self-care (although this is essential). But really discerning, attuning and responding to my deepest needs and desires. Treating myself with the utmost care, love and tenderness.

For me this week, this would look like:

-abstaining from wheat and dairy and making sure my diet is diverse, nutrient/energy rich, delicious and I stay very hydrated

-attending my good friend’s Daring Divas dance class and connecting with the women in this vibrant community---no matter how busy my schedule looks

-appreciating and supporting my partner and taking time to be present with him/his challenges (this always comes back to me a hundred fold!)

-going to bed NO MATTER WHAT by 9:30 p.m. on the weeknights (after 44 years, I’ve finally figured out my very best sleep happens before midnight)

-getting outside to enjoy the amazing 71 degree weather at the park with my son, even though I’ve got mounds of work at the office (no worries, the important stuff always gets done)

-paying attention to my personal rhythms, ebbs and flows—trusting that I will be guided to know how/when/where to best take action at work and at home

-returning the expensive, but uncomfortable sheets I bought this past summer that don’t support me in having optimal sleep (I know, Princess and the Pea, but sleep is really key for me!)

My husband and son are going on a camping trip this weekend. Pause. I think I hear some whoops from the parents who know how delicious and rare it is to have time alone in your house when your beloved family is away!

In the past, my usual MO would have been to rush into planning mode—filling all my waking hours with lunches, walks, get-togethers and non-stop social activities with friends. But today, I’m really challenging myself to slow down. To go inward and ask, “What would exquisite self-care look and feel like this weekend?” And who knows what the response will be.

It might look like cleaning out my garage, sitting for a couple of hours and coloring mandalas, blasting some blues and dancing in my living room, going on a vigorous walk/run or sitting on my back porch swing soaking up the decadence of unscheduled time. I have no idea.

But, I do plan on choosing how I spend this time very intentionally. Really reveling in this concept of what exquisite self-care might look and feel like to me.

I’ve learned that not only is self-care crucial to our well-being, to our sustenance, to feeling “alive”—more and more, it’s become my spiritual practice.

Because I find that when I listen and respond to the whispers in my heart about what I most need to love, nurture and nourish my physical and emotional well-being, I feel more connected to my Source, to God. Often, if I listen closely, it’s as if I can hear an invisible voice cheering me on, saying, “Yes, this is how you’re supposed to live--how you were intended to live. You are worthy and deserving of this level of care. And, when you honor and love yourself, you honor and love me, your Source.”

And I believe that sense of interconnectedness is what most of us live for. I know it is for me.

FIND YOUR TRIBE, ATTEND A RETREAT/WORKSHOP OR JOIN THE DIALOGUE: Would you like to experience connection and community and receive support from like-minded women? Join or become trained to facilitate a Personal Renewal Group, visit our calendar to learn more about upcoming events including our November 5th One-Day Reflect, Reclaim, Re-Balance Women's One-Day Self-Renewal Retreat and our FREE October 14th Live Inside Out teleclass on Being More Present and Remembering What Matters.

Also, check out our Live Inside Out community and read how people are living more intentionally.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to life balance and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: A desert flower in an oasis in Big Bend National Park, one of the places my soul gets nourished.

What the World Needs Now

2010-09-19T09:55:00.071-06:00

Even though I come from a large family, growing up, I often felt isolated.

My parents were big seekers. Much of their energy was spent on their personal quest to find or experience God---and they encouraged us to do the same.

Yet, in the midst of all this spiritual exploration-- we often lacked connection to a larger, extended community. And to be fair to my parents, I know the desire was there, but the knowledge of how to actually do this seemed to be missing. (I think this is common among many; I hear the question, "How DO you create community?" quite often as I travel around the U.S.)

I'm sure this is why I'm so passionate about fostering connection and community for myself, my family, and others today (the joke with my husband when I’m headed out the door to an evening or weekend gathering, is “which women’s circle, mastermind session or group are you going to —or starting--today?”).

Last night I had the opportunity to gather with some of the wonderful women and their families from my good friend Dr. Deborah Kern’s Daring Diva community. Earlier this month, in honor of my maternal grandmother’s 100th birthday, I gathered with a small group of women to honor/celebrate the gifts we have received from our grandmothers—living and deceased. This coming week, I’ll be meeting with a small sister group on the Fall Equinox to share insights from a teleclass we’re all participating in (on the same evening, another group I started for entrepreneurs in 2005, will be gathering).

And, for the last 7 years, I’ve been pouring energy into helping women reconnect with who they are, focus on self-compassion and attune to their need/desires through our global Personal Renewal Group Program. And, I am very committed to continuing to regularly create and facilitate women’s retreats.

Why does it seem that now, more than ever, we’re all craving opportunities to gather in small, intentional gatherings and explore what matters most (Live Inside Out provides more insight into this)?

~I believe we’re one another’s teachers. And, we were MEANT to be interdependent not uber-independent (a common modus operandi for many of us); on the deepest level we know this to be true.
~Often when I’m going through a challenging time, when I gather with like-minded friends for authentic conversation—I feel validated, supported and more often than not, discover we’re having similar—and sometimes even identical--experiences!
~Friends that care deeply about me and hold the highest/best for me, remind me of who I *really* am—and help me remember my stuff isn’t the “biggest thing that’s happening to me,” it’s just the “biggest thing in the moment!”
~We’re much more interconnected than we could ever imagine. And when we gather in groups, we’re reminded of this in profound ways.
~So often when we hear someone in a group articulate what we’ve been trying for months to put words to, we have an immediate shift in perspective or ah-ha moment.
~The practice of being real, vulnerable and deeply authentic in front of others—as my mentor says, “showing up warts and all”—can be amazingly cathartic.
~More and more research is illustrating the positive effect gathering in groups has on women—specifically our immune systems and serotonin levels get a boost and we release oxytocin—which results in us feeling calmer and happier overall (and yes, men need this, too!).

The power of groups, never ceases to amaze me. I truly think it's what the world needs now.

And as I launch a new group experience this week on Self-Care as a Spiritual Practice (my first ongoing women’s group in three years), I move into the next phase and evolution of my work, knowing that the gifts that will come from this journey will be unfolding for years to come.

It’s just a feeling I have. And usually, my hunches are right on.

FIND YOUR TRIBE, ATTEND A RETREAT/WORKSHOP OR JOIN THE DIALOGUE: Would you like to experience connection and community and receive support from like-minded women? Join or become trained to facilitate a Personal Renewal Group, visit our calendar to learn more about upcoming events including our November 5th One-Day Women's Self-Renewal Retreat and our FREE October 14th Live Inside Out teleclass on Being More Present and Remembering What Matters.

Also, check out our Live Inside Out community and read how people are living more intentionally.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to life balance and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: Whether in groups of 3 or 300, from Africa to Atlanta, women from around the world have understood the power that comes from gathering in groups for thousands of years.

Whirling Dervish

2010-09-12T18:17:00.015-06:00

This morning I could feel that familiar fall sensation rushing through my body of “too much to do.”

Supporting my husband through his job search, helping my son with school activities and easing into 3rd grade, carving out time to connect to family members/friends, training/transitioning new and old staff members, launching new programs/events, supporting clients and our team, navigating technical challenges at work, crawling out of email overwhelm, meeting my physical/emotional needs and ... well, you know the story!

I had a bit of rare, quiet time to myself earlier today and as I came out of my morning meditation, I could not shake the image of the whirling dervishes (great video!) I had seen in Turkey years ago.

The whirling dervishes practice a form of moving meditation connected to the 13th century Sufi mystic and poet Rumi.

They go into a trance-like state where they experience a deep connection to the Divine while spinning feverishly in a rhythmic motion (and they never appear dizzy or lost).

When they dance, the right hand opens to the skies in prayer. The left hand, upon which their gaze rests, is turned towards the earth--their home, the place where they serve.

To me, the twirling dancers seem to inspire or ask, “How can you stay connected to your source/God—what really matters—and still be active, productive and engaged in the world?”

It reminded me that my doorway to experiencing this kind of balance is practicing self-care.

When I attune and respond to my deepest needs and desires—taking time for dance or movement, building in a daily 20 minute meditation, wisely choosing who I spend time with, ensuring I create space for time alone/with my partner/with my family, saying “no” to “shoulds,” taking time to let nature heal me--- my connection to that inner wisdom is stronger, more intact.

And, I’m able to move through my day and week—at whatever speed I choose—without losing my balance.

At least not as often. And, I’ll take that any day.

JOIN A GROUP, ATTEND A RETREAT/WORKSHOP OR DIALOGUE WITH ME: Would you like to learn more about the power of self-care and receive support from like-minded women? Start or join a Personal Renewal Group, visit our calendar to learn more about upcoming events including our November Self-Renewal Retreat and our FREE October 14th Live Inside Out teleclass on Being More Present and Remembering What Matters.

Also, check out our Live Inside Out community and read how people are living more intentionally.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to life balance and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: by Reza--a dancer at The Dervish school of Mowlana.

Risking It

2010-09-02T19:45:00.035-06:00

My wonderful brother Kert, a Qi Gong teacher, is 14 months younger than me and is a constant source of inspiration (read more about some of Kert’s adventures).

He’s currently studying a special form of Qi Gong from a Taoist Priest in the Wudang Mountains of China (see photos of the mountains on this blog I stumbled across).

He plans to be there for six months. He left knowing no one and not having any idea what to expect (the schedule is intense, he’s up at 5:00 a.m. each day to begin his practice with other men and women from around the globe). His gut told him to take this leap and he listened.

He’s always been comfortable taking risks, much like me.

I think we got this risk-taking streak from our maternal grandmother, who died at the age of 94 (she would have been 100 on Sept. 1st). We were very close to her.

Born in 1910, our “Nonnie” grew up on the oldest dairy farm in Texas.

She got an undergraduate degree in education, received a graduate degree in her twenties, traveled with her girlfriends to Europe while she was single, asked for a divorce and became a single mother in her early thirties, bought land and opened/managed a soda shop (and was proudly the first in the state to serve “soft serve ice cream”) while teaching school, actively invested and was infamous for the amazing trips she took me and my six siblings on in the 70’s and 80’s. One of my favorite photos is of 69 year-old Nonnie and me riding camels next to the Pyramids of Giza (yes in Egypt!).

I have been reflecting lately on the gifts that I have received from my female ancestors—especially my grandmothers.

I believe that when I honor these gifts—such as risk taking from Nonnie—I call them forth, strengthen them and breathe life into them.

And I believe that risk taking really asks that we be visible (when I cashed out my 401K in 2007 to open a small publishing company, there was nowhere to hide!). And showing up and being seen is no small feat for many.

The older I get, the more comfortable I get taking all kinds of risks. I find that when I step out of my comfort zone, jump off a cliff or tread down an unknown path because I felt “guided” to do so-- I feel alive.

And as I think of Kert eating congee every morning for breakfast in China while I eat my homemade soy yogurt parfait, I smile at the photo of Nonnie next to my bathroom sink and wonder what she’d have to say about all of this!

JOIN A GROUP, ATTEND A RETREAT/WORKSHOP OR DIALOGUE WITH ME: Would you like to learn more about the power of self-care and receive support for taking risks in life? Start or join a Personal Renewal Group, visit our calendar to learn more about upcoming events including our FREE September 9th Live Inside Out teleclass on Strategies for Balanced Living.

Also, check out our Live Inside Out community and read how people are living more intentionally.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to life balance and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: My sister recently gave me these beautiful red wrap sandals from Spain. I love them because they remind me to take risks and to show up big and be seen!

Unexpected Gifts

2010-08-23T06:33:00.036-06:00

"Life isn't about waiting for the storms to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain." - Vivian Green

I’ve been writing a lot lately about living in the unknown, the process of birthing “what’s next” and the gifts that can come from being in a state of flux because that’s where some of my closest friends, family and clients are hanging out these days.

My husband was laid off this summer from his job and is in the middle of a job search.

When you’re in the middle of a big life or career transition, it’s really easy to fall into the “we’ll be happier when …” mindset or to constantly wish things were different from how they are.

But I know from past experience, happiness is an inside-out job. I’m sure of it. And, I believe that it’s just as possible to experience joy and well-being in the here and now as it will be a few months from now when my husband is working again (meditating together each morning before we start our day has really helped remind us of this).

Saturday morning, rather than rush off to my favorite yoga class and the farmer’s market, I headed out with my family for a walk on our neighborhood nature trail before the temps got unbearable.

I love to walk with friends and family. I think it’s one of the most nourishing activities in the world: soaking up nature, heartfelt connection, sweating/feeling your strong muscles, synching up to your walking partner’s rhythms and slowing down to enjoy life at a pedestrian pace (rather than the “human race” speed most of us are in much of the time!).

As we walked and our son trailed us on his bike, we began to talk about what good things have come from my husband’s recent job loss.

He shared he’s appreciating getting more time with our son, he’s enjoying learning more about my businesses, he’s getting in better physical shape (he started running again) and he loves that we’re getting to meditate together each morning after our little one goes to school.

I love that I’m becoming more conscious about how I spend, I'm getting more child care support which is allowing me to do some things I normally can’t, I’m getting more help with meal preparation and overall --even though it sometimes drives me crazy to have my husband at the house when I’m working from home-- it’s nice to have the company and someone to enjoy tacos with in the middle of the day.

I just had the opportunity to lead a weekend self-renewal retreat in the Berkshires of MA at Kripalu for 54 amazing women ages 25-70, many of whom were navigating major life transitions.

As the women opened up to me individually and shared where they are-- contemplating divorce, healing from a lover’s suicide, recovering from a life-long addiction, putting together their life after a major job loss, finding a path to wholeness after a debilitating disease—what struck me was how much healing and empowerment they were deriving from these challenges. For the most part, they shared they felt stronger, wiser and were becoming aware of all the “gifts” that have come from their recent struggles.

Their courage touched me deeply and reminded me that most of us are navigating some type of challenge or transition right now.

They reminded me we always have a choice about how we choose to perceive a situation.

And, sometimes what we think may be the “worst” thing that could have ever happened to us, might just bear an outcome greater than we have imagined was possible.

JOIN A GROUP, ATTEND A RETREAT/WORKSHOP OR DIALOGUE WITH ME: Would you like to learn more about the power of self-care and how being kinder to yourself can change your life? Start or join a Personal Renewal Group, visit our calendar to learn more about upcoming events including my Aug. 27th Career Strategy Workshop: Find a Fit, Create a Plan, Love Your Workshop and our FREE September 9th Live Inside Out teleclass on Strategies for Balanced Living.

Also, check out our Live Inside Out community and share how you create balance in your relationship.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to life balance and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: Renee Peterson Trudeau. Monk's Pond at Kripalu, a beautiful, quiet pond sitting atop a hill behind the main building.

The Void

2010-08-09T14:26:00.019-06:00

One of my dearest friends in in the void.

She is gestating “what’s next” in her life, but to her, it just feels like she’s stuck. And restless. And bored. And dissatisfied with everything-- work/relationship/home. And she might even be a little depressed.

Can you relate?

As a society, Americans in particular are not fond of being clueluess, without direction, not having the answers or being lost (even if it’s just in the grocery store parking lot). Read more on Living In the Unknown from my recent newsletter.

As I watch her—along with thousands of our clients, PRG Facilitators and members, friends and colleagues and probably many of the women that will be at my retreat at Kripalu—I find myself wishing things could be different.

Wouldn’t it be great if we had all evolved to a place where when one of our brothers or sisters was in the void and having a hard time seeing the big picture—that their “unknowing and dissatisfaction” are a beautiful, essential piece to their journey—we would all give them a big hug, say bravo, well-done, hang in there, you’re exactly where you should be on your path?

Or at the very least, we would stop what we’re doing to be with them, listen whole-heartedly to what they’re experiencing and reflect back to them who they really are? So that they don’t feel quite so lost and alone. And in hopes that they might even begin to relax, trust and allow themselves to believe that what is being born from the void is so beautiful and magnificent, it might just take their breath away.

JOIN A GROUP, ATTEND A RETREAT/WORKSHOP OR DIALOGUE WITH ME: Would you like to learn more about the power of self-care and how being kinder to yourself can change your life? Our Kripalu retreat sold out last week, but keep checking The Crossings web site and visit our calendar to learn more about upcoming events including my Aug. 27th Career Strategy Workshop: Find a Fit, Create a Plan, Love Your Workshop and our FREE September 9th Live Inside Out teleclass on Strategies for Balanced Living.

Also, check out our Live Inside Out community and share how you create balance in your relationship.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to life balance and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

SPACE IMAGE: A beautiful new image of two colliding galaxies has been released by NASA's Great Observatories. The Antennae galaxies, located about 62 million light-years from Earth, are shown in this composite image. The Antennae galaxies take their name from the long antenna-like "arms," seen in wide-angle views of the system. These features were produced by tidal forces generated in the collision. They were born from the void. Read more.

Inspiration

2010-08-02T14:47:00.035-06:00

Art is the only way to run away without leaving home. -- Twyla Tharp

I finished my writing sabbatical on Friday and felt some sadness.

I could have kept going. Maybe I’ll take another break this fall. I’m definitely feeling ripe around some themes that are brewing, emerging and calling to me right now.

It’s been interesting to keep expanding the boundaries of the themes I speak a lot about—self-renewal and life balance—and taking these teachings into other realms. Like peeling away the layers of an onion.

During the last week of my sabbatical, my husband and I attended a benefit concert for the Midwives Alliance of North America. Iron and Wine (and Calexico) played. I had just been introduced to Sam Beam (singer for Iron and Wine) through Austin City Limits and was really blown away by his songwriting and artistic ability. His poetic music really moved me (I love the Trapeze Singer).

During that same week I finished Crossing to Avalon (a chronicle of a woman’s spiritual pilgrimage) by one of my mentors, Jean Shinoda Bolen. I was transported to Glastonbury and the Chartres Cathedral felt like I was walking besides Jean as she rounded labyrinths, crossed seas and explored these ethereal sacred sites.

And yesterday I spent the day relaxing in the cool waters of the Guadalupe under the tall rock wall at Guadalupe State Park with some friends. The natural beauty of the river, thousands of different colored and shaped rocks and hundred year old trees lining the banks were so delicious, I almost felt stuffed--as if I’d eaten too much.

Since I unplugged last month, I’m much more attuned to sounds, colors, smells and aesthetics. Last week, I couldn’t get enough art, music, books and found myself experiencing sights and sounds like I never had before.

For me, a central component of emotional well-being or balanced living is living an inspired life.

I think we all have moments where we feel like we’re in a black and white movie and our actions seem rote, but when we take the time and energy to breathe color, vibrancy, poetry and passion into our lives, we feel inspired. And often, we remember who we really are.

And for me, that’s what it’s all about.

P.S. August is a great month to take a retreat. I just shared some tips in my latest life balance newsletter on how to create a “pause” in your life. Check it out if this speaks to you.

JOIN A GROUP, ATTEND A RETREAT/WORKSHOP OR DIALOGUE WITH ME: Would you like to learn more about the power of self-care and how being kinder to yourself can change your life? Join us in the cool Berkshire mountains in MA, August 13-15 at the beautiful Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health for our Self-Renewal Retreat. One of my favorite spots on the planet and the retreat center that I visit when I'm ready to make a huge life shift! Visit our calendar to learn more about upcoming events including my Aug. 27th Career Strategy Workshop: Find a Fit, Create a Plan, Love Your Workshop and our FREE September 9th Live Inside Out teleclass on Strategies for Balanced Living.

Also, check out our Live Inside Out community and share how you create balance in your relationship.

The Journey, a blog about coach/author/entrepreneur Renee Trudeau’s personal journey to life balance and living life from the inside out, comes out weekly.

Photo: While on the banks of the Guadalupe River, this stunning bird (I later found out it's called a painted bunting) visited us while we lounged in the shade. We couldn't take our eyes off of her.